Hello this is my first post, although i have been reading the forum for just over four months
I need some advice I dont know where else to go and am so upset and shocked I cannot even bring myself to talk to my girlfriends onthe phone.
I have suspected my husband of seven months has been not altogether honest with me for a couple of months. He is always on a internet forum to do with a soccer team in england and because it is local he often meets a lot of them in when the team play. He has also been running a football team and most of them are involved. One of the girls has been getting lifts from him and watching this football team for a while, i found out by accident. My gut instinct was something was going on between them or had the potential too.
This girl has been sending him private messages via the internet forum and everytime i come into the room or am on our PC is on MSM trying to speak to him, sending little crying smilies if he doesnt say goodnight and she has been texting him.
I know this is really wrong what I am about to admit to but about a week ago i was really suspicious and looked at his mobile/cell phone and found they had been texting each other some of the messages where really personal for example off her: I am just going to get in the shower, babe, will call you soon and off him Ok honey
Very sadly one of our friend died suddently in an accident last week which was really was really upsetting and he had a lot to do witht he internet forum and lots of people knew him including her (not very long though only a couple of months, me and my husband had known him for a number of years) I let it go because i knew everybody was upset. we all met up last week, prior to this i had seen this girl about but she had never spoke to me and her face when I walked into the meeting place was a picture, it dropped and she avoided me. Last week i told him i felt insecure about his relationship with her and he told me not to be silly, he could understand how i felt but she was just one of the lads, and no threat. so i felt better....... till this week
My husband drove quite a few people to the funeral service on valentines day. this guy who died was 38 so understandibly, everybody is really upset. However outside the church, she was the first one after the service he went over to to hug and console. There was a wake which the family put on and he stayed out and his sister came to pick me up and drive me home cause i was tired and had work early the next day...He came home at 3 in the morning.
Last night she was on MSM all the day and he was respoinding back, so when i come home from work tonight I looked at his private messages, i am wrong to do so, i know i have totally invaded his privacy, but what i have found has made me feel sick.
one message said from her that she was in work, tired and bored and wanted to go to bed to sleep and he responded with " lets be honest if it was my bed you wouldnt get much sleep" and then there is more about how he would have a pillow fight with her after he has sh*gg*ed her, i am sure you can understand what I mean.
I am sitting here shaking and crying, he is a cab driver and apparently in work, but there were things said that are making me think he is meeting up with friends and she will be there later tonight.
I dont know what to do i am heartbroken and cannot believe this is happening, to be fair, it is him being more suggestive than her. i am sorry this is my first post but i honestly cannot think what to do and how to handle this?
Can anybody advise or help me please?????
I need some advice I dont know where else to go and am so upset and shocked I cannot even bring myself to talk to my girlfriends onthe phone.
I have suspected my husband of seven months has been not altogether honest with me for a couple of months. He is always on a internet forum to do with a soccer team in england and because it is local he often meets a lot of them in when the team play. He has also been running a football team and most of them are involved. One of the girls has been getting lifts from him and watching this football team for a while, i found out by accident. My gut instinct was something was going on between them or had the potential too.
This girl has been sending him private messages via the internet forum and everytime i come into the room or am on our PC is on MSM trying to speak to him, sending little crying smilies if he doesnt say goodnight and she has been texting him.
I know this is really wrong what I am about to admit to but about a week ago i was really suspicious and looked at his mobile/cell phone and found they had been texting each other some of the messages where really personal for example off her: I am just going to get in the shower, babe, will call you soon and off him Ok honey
Very sadly one of our friend died suddently in an accident last week which was really was really upsetting and he had a lot to do witht he internet forum and lots of people knew him including her (not very long though only a couple of months, me and my husband had known him for a number of years) I let it go because i knew everybody was upset. we all met up last week, prior to this i had seen this girl about but she had never spoke to me and her face when I walked into the meeting place was a picture, it dropped and she avoided me. Last week i told him i felt insecure about his relationship with her and he told me not to be silly, he could understand how i felt but she was just one of the lads, and no threat. so i felt better....... till this week
My husband drove quite a few people to the funeral service on valentines day. this guy who died was 38 so understandibly, everybody is really upset. However outside the church, she was the first one after the service he went over to to hug and console. There was a wake which the family put on and he stayed out and his sister came to pick me up and drive me home cause i was tired and had work early the next day...He came home at 3 in the morning.
Last night she was on MSM all the day and he was respoinding back, so when i come home from work tonight I looked at his private messages, i am wrong to do so, i know i have totally invaded his privacy, but what i have found has made me feel sick.
one message said from her that she was in work, tired and bored and wanted to go to bed to sleep and he responded with " lets be honest if it was my bed you wouldnt get much sleep" and then there is more about how he would have a pillow fight with her after he has sh*gg*ed her, i am sure you can understand what I mean.
I am sitting here shaking and crying, he is a cab driver and apparently in work, but there were things said that are making me think he is meeting up with friends and she will be there later tonight.
I dont know what to do i am heartbroken and cannot believe this is happening, to be fair, it is him being more suggestive than her. i am sorry this is my first post but i honestly cannot think what to do and how to handle this?
Can anybody advise or help me please?????
while I am not going to spew any ******** about it making you stronger or being good for you, even that faded hurt will melt into wisdom and empathy for your little sisters all over the world for whom that place waits, and who will, like you, scramble up over its slimy walls and back into the light.