I bought my friend her first coach now she doesnt even care.

Louiebabeee

Louiebabeee

O.G.
Sep 30, 2008
2,338
8
#1
One of my best friends, who I have been friends with since we were freshman in HS just graduated this year. Her mom and sis are big on the fake purse thing, and spend like $80 on really really fake coach/prada/chanel purses. She has a bunch they gave her but has never used them, she says she thinks its just stupid to have a fake bag. So i went on vacation a month ago and bought her a small coach bag. I didnt have that much money, infact her bag was all i bought! Well of course she really like it, i gave it to her a few weeks ago when i got back. Today was her graduation party but i was sick and couldnt go. She just sent me all these pics of this huge coach bag her aunt got her, she texted me pics and then went " so this is what my aunt got me for graduation..its 100% real and its huge, she knows the person who work there so she got a discount too(at the coach outlet), she gave me the tags and the receipt that says how much it was so yeah its very real" And i just said ohh sweet now you have two=p ...well then she says" yeah i love the one my aunt got me, it ssoooooo big and nice" .

uhm hello..is she TRYING to make me feel bad or what???
 
#2
Only you know your friend. If she's a sucky person in general, than yes, she's trying to make you feel bad. If she's a great person, than no, she's probably just excited about her gift.
 
#3
^I agree^, I think she's a sucky person. :yes: She has no couth.

Even if she may be unthinking in the way she stated how much she loves big bags, she should eventually rethink how she treated you and apologize.

I weed people who are not nice even if we've been 'friends' for years. It is just not worth holding onto a friendship when you're the only one holding it up.

Sorry you went through that. It was very generous of you to think of her and get her something. This act puts the spotlight of kindness on you and puts her in an egocentric black hole.
 
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#4
buttercup784eve said:
Only you know your friend. If she's a sucky person in general, than yes, she's trying to make you feel bad. If she's a great person, than no, she's probably just excited about her gift.
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I agree that only you can know your friend well enough to know if she's being mean/rude/ungrateful.

It's possible that she is a "big bag" person more than a smaller bag. A purse is a very personal thing to buy someone (at least in my opinion) because people have different tastes.

You did a very sweet thing to get her the first real Coach :smile:

I have to disagree with the poster above me though. I wouldn't end the friendship over this one thing. If she has a long history of making you feel bad, etc then it probably isn't a healthy friendship, but she may not even realize that she hurt your feelings.

Maybe in a day or so, talk to her about it. People aren't telepathic - just like we shouldn't expect our SOs to read our minds, we shouldn't expect our friends - no matter how close they are- to read our minds either. If she's a good person, she will probably apologize for hurting her feelings and tell you it was unintentional.
 
#5
I don't think she was saying it to be spiteful, just unknowing that what she said would hurt your feelings. At least she was excited about sharing with you that it was an authentic bag.
 
#6
grayxie said:
I don't think she was saying it to be spiteful, just unknowing that what she said would hurt your feelings. At least she was excited about sharing with you that it was an authentic bag.
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I agree, I think you feeling way too defensive about it. I'm sure she loves your bag and the thought you put into it.
 
#7
Well in ths past she has been very mean and we actuily didnt speak for about 8 months one time. but that was a long time ago. She just called me and was seriously acting like a brat, i was like uhm..ok. I know what your saying about her liking big bags, thats how i am...but she likes small bags! She always goes on about hateing big bags and all she likes is a bag that will fit her phone, lipgloss and gum and shes good. o well whatever.
 
#9
Louiebabeee said:
Well in ths past she has been very mean and we actuily didnt speak for about 8 months one time. but that was a long time ago. She just called me and was seriously acting like a brat, i was like uhm..ok. I know what your saying about her liking big bags, thats how i am...but she likes small bags! She always goes on about hateing big bags and all she likes is a bag that will fit her phone, lipgloss and gum and shes good. o well whatever.
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So you guys are like frenemies?
 
#10
yeah. I guess there it is. Whatever...I should have known better, Im always doing really nice things for people though they never do them back. I guess i should have learned by now. obviously not.
 
#11
Louiebabeee said:
yeah. I guess there it is. Whatever...I should have known better, Im always doing really nice things for people though they never do them back. I guess i should have learned by now. obviously not.
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Well you really shouldn't go through life expecting people to do nice things for you in return. And I'm NOT being mean here, or saying you're not a good person or anything, but you will be less likely to be disappointed in life if you do the nice thing and then let it go.

It's a hard life lesson to learn, but people suck sometimes. Don't let that change who YOU are.
 
#12
buttercup784eve said:
So you guys are like frenemies?
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no were not frenemies. We were best friends for a year and then she started hanging out with two really snotty girls and i became friends with them too...untill they decided they didnt like me, and told her if she wanted to hang with them then she better get rid of me. She just was mean to me so id leave her alone. Well they didnt leave it at that. For the entire rest of the school year (this happened in september) the two girls, my friend and their whole snotty group did whatever they could to get at me...i had girls i didnt even know follow me in the bathroom and just talk about me and say mean things that were not true at all. they spread the most horrable rumors about me and everyone believed them. I ate alone almost the entire year. even then they didnt leave me alone. anyways my senior year i had classes with her and those two girls turned on her and did the same thing, i told her now she know what i went through for a whole year. She apolagized and we talked about it alot and have been good friends again since then. lol sorry about the long story.
 
#13
buttercup784eve said:
Well you really shouldn't go through life expecting people to do nice things for you in return. And I'm NOT being mean here, or saying you're not a good person or anything, but you will be less likely to be disappointed in life if you do the nice thing and then let it go.

It's a hard life lesson to learn, but people suck sometimes. Don't let that change who YOU are.
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no i know your not trying to be mean..and i dont expect people to do nice things in return..i just dont expect to have them be mean in return. but i know what your saying.
 
#15
hm that could be i guess, but the bag i bought her wasnt thattt small..its a little bigger than the bags she usualy has. but anyways...well i guess i dont really know what she was trying to do. Maybe she was just mad i was sick and didnt come, or she was just in a snotty mood. Anyways i was just really mad and venting. If she acts like that when i see her next im definatly going to say something though.
 
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