The Megan Meier Myspace suicide case *Update: Conviction overturned* see page 23

[Speedy]

It wasn't just that comment, it was also "Everyone in O'Fallon will know what a slut and mean person you are" (I'm paraphrasing here) AND her parents anger and non-chalance at what happened with "Josh". But the woman who made the profile and mesaged her to add "him" as a friend and played on her senses is responsible (again, IMHO) for driving her to suicide.

I'm guessing you've never had self-esteem/depression/ADD issues.

[devoted]

Originally Posted by Speedy

It wasn't just that comment, it was also "Everyone in O'Fallon will know what a slut and mean person you are" (I'm paraphrasing here) AND her parents anger and non-chalance at what happened with "Josh". But the woman who made the profile and mesaged her to add "him" as a friend and played on her senses is responsible (again, IMHO) for driving her to suicide. I'm guessing you've never had self-esteem/depression/ADD issues.

No ADD. But yes, typical teenage agnst, nothing worthy of needing medication....Lots of people have self esteem and depression issues, they don't kill themselves over being called a slut and a mean girl. Since Megan had such severe depression, how could her parents ever think that meeting strangers on the internet might benefit their daughter? Especially cute strangers who are showing a keen interest in her but refuse to meet her? I don't know, the parents should have suspected something. Psychos will always exist, in the end it's the parents job to protect their kids from them.


and i agree completely about the woman being responsible...just trying to view things from another perspective

[DamierLover]

What a nightmare! I don't understand why nothing can be done...

[Jadore]

I hope the bully dies in hell, what a low life would do that, children are so innocent,especially one that has issues... I hope that person gets the best of Karma!

[keodi]

This is insane! it's sad that nothing is being done. I'm going to contact the DA's office...

[vanojr9]

I can't comment really on the story, because everything I feel has been said - rage, sadness, the need to legally prosecute the mother. But I do want to add that I know several people who work for a company that runs a forum and myspace-type website for tweens and teens. It has a team of mods that read every post, every private message, every profile, constantly screening for this sort of stuff (as well as any sort of solicitation). It's a paid, full-time job. The company (a large conglomerate) does so because it's the only way to responsibly manage a website that encourages participation from teens. So it's not uncalled for, or even unimaginable, that MySpace be held to a similar standard if it wishes to market itself to teens.

[PinkSuadeSoho]

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21844203/?GT1=10547
Unless they had the story up earlier, here it is again. Just complete sadness.

[PinkSuadeSoho]

Originally Posted by Roo

So how do you feel about predatory pedophiles on myspace? Should myspace be a free-for-all with absolutely no monitoring or regulating at all? I guess what I don't understand is that if you read the article, the parents of this child WERE monitoring their child's use of myspace. What they were not prepared for is the fact that an adult would go to such lengths to stalk and harass their child. The problem with myspace is that there are no checks and balances. There are no controls. I personally think myspace should not allow underage children on it AT ALL unless they are willing to take the steps that are necessary to make sure the environment is safe for them. It's clear they are not willing to do this. How many times does something bad need to happen before they take responsibility? Case in point: here where I live, an 18 year old young man met an underage girl on myspace who lived in his area. It turns out they had mutual friends in the small town where they both lived. He invited her to a party and she snuck out of her parents house in order to go with him. They went to the party and on the way home (seemingly) from the party, he took her to a remote area, raped her, shot her and left her for dead. This young man had a myspace page in which he had detailed elaborate fantasies about raping and mutilating women. The page was reported to myspace numerous times. The media got wind of this and did a story on it. The reporter doing the story also reported the page. After two weeks the reporter got a canned reply from myspace that the page did not violate any terms of service. THEY ARE NOT DOING THEIR JOB at myspace and there is a reason. It's called MONEY. Eventually they will have to answer to the lack of responsibility. I have a feeling at some point in the near future the government is going to get involved and they will have to answer to a Congressional committee about why they allow this behavior to go on under their noses.

Thanks for putting this story out! Your post is

[Neeya]

I'm sure it has already come up, well, maybe, but I'm not reading back...

"driven to suicide by myspace" is horribly inaccurate. She was driven to suicide by a team of irresponsible and terrible parents, by an crude game, and by her own depression...but not by myspace. I dislike myspace as much as the next person, but people need to take responsibility for their actions, not place the blame on a social engine. If myspace didn't exist, that parent could have done just as much damage in another way, if not by that website. I agree that absolutely no children or teens under the age of 18 (hell, I say 21) should be allowed on myspace, BUT...

Honestly, the girl, though tragic as it may be, was very much unstable. A number of things could have set her off in the exact same way. A HS friend of mine had the same issue- a single text message from a student he'd never even spoken to set him off.

How do you completely screen myspace? Honestly? People can lie, finagle, and manipulate their way around and go undetected. There are a ton of bizarre profiles on myspace that are being utilized by perfectly normal people (musicians, artists, entrepreneurs, all doing a bit of self-advertising). Even if myspace screens every bit of writign, they certainly can't catch every little psychologically harmful comment. Most people don't want a big-brother in their private conversations! They don't screen AIM, and I've seen plenty of hurtful convos come out of that, and it is just as easy to misrepresent yourself there (and you can locate someones AIM name in plenty of ways, leaving you open to a world of strangers). If you plan on taking the stance that myspace should be completely regulated and screened, I hope you take a similar stance on free speech and big-brother, because if not, your values are a bit off-kilter from one another.

Limit myspace to significantly older teens (though they are just as much at risk), mourn for the child who lived with such a terrible mental burden, blame the cruel perpetrators, and question the parents until your sure that they were truly responsible regarding their child's mental health and her hobbies. That's my stance.

[helium]

Originally Posted by Neeya

I'm sure it has already come up, well, maybe, but I'm not reading back... "driven to suicide by myspace" is horribly inaccurate. She was driven to suicide by a team of irresponsible and terrible parents, by an crude game, and by her own depression...but not by myspace. I dislike myspace as much as the next person, but people need to take responsibility for their actions, not place the blame on a social engine. If myspace didn't exist, that parent could have done just as much damage in another way, if not by that website. I agree that absolutely no children or teens under the age of 18 (hell, I say 21) should be allowed on myspace, BUT... Honestly, the girl, though tragic as it may be, was very much unstable. A number of things could have set her off in the exact same way. A HS friend of mine had the same issue- a single text message from a student he'd never even spoken to set him off.

I agree that it is not myspace's fault. It's easy to blame myspace because it's not a person if that makes sense, so you're not hurting anyone, and if they came out with an apology it's easy: it's just a sentence, a formulaic statement that some PR guy wrote in two minutes. People just avoid conflict with whoever was in the wrong, either that or they just can't accept it themselves that they may have done something horribly wrong. It's sort of like when school shootings happen and they blame video games, I know lots of people think video games and media are to blame.These things are not to blame, they may be catalysts but they're not the cause.

[Roo]

Ok, so taking the 'don't blame myspace' idea a step further:

Would this child still be alive if myspace did not exist?

Probably.

[Baby Boo]

this story brought tears to my eyes. those paretns are HORRIBLE people and they belong in jail!

[rubylola]

yes, myspace has to shoulder some responsibility (though not culpability) for creating an environment where a group of adults and children could group together and masquerade as a handsome teenaged boy to bait/manipulate/abuse- a young girl.

Posters have said that the adults could have found another way to mistreat the child and didn't need myspace to do it, but without such an environment, short of hiring an actor to play the part of the teenaged boy, I don't see how they could have carried out the deceit that they did.

When people are unable to hide their identity it makes them more accountable for their actions and their worst behaviour will be curbed accordingly.

[Speedy]

Originally Posted by Roo

Ok, so taking the 'don't blame myspace' idea a step further: Would this child still be alive if myspace did not exist? Probably.

I agree. Very much so I agree. While I do not blame MySpace for this at all, it was a tool for the woman to use and she used it knowingly to hurt this child's feelings. While I also don't feel MySapce is responsible, I liken it to owning a gun. The gun doesn't kill a person, the human holding the gun and pulling the trigger does. Again, it's a tool.

And many, many people deal with demons a lot deeper than "typical teenage angst" in thier lives. If one section of society isn't cruel to someone, you can bet there will be another section who will. All one needs to be is one of the following: Poor, a person of the wrong color, the wrong gender, in the wrong job, have made poor life choices, disabled or disfigured, of the "wrong" sexual orientation, wrong religion, said the wrong thing for people to hear/read/know, on and on.

Google "Teen Suicide" and you'll see bullying, cyber and IRL, is the most common reason for a child to take his/her own life. Yes, words DO kill.

[Neeya]

Originally Posted by Roo

Ok, so taking the 'don't blame myspace' idea a step further: Would this child still be alive if myspace did not exist? Probably.

That is a HUGE stretch.

Would she be alive if this happened on AIM?

On Facebook?

On any other messaging/connection site?

You can't change the fact that the girl was suicidal and depressed in the first place. What if the parent had decided she would attack the girl via another system? The same result would more than likely have occurred. So what do we do? Shut down all social internet sites, to avoid internet-threats/insults to those with fragile mental states? It is surely a tragedy, what has happened, but this isn't the first time someone who is depressed has committed suicide at the hands of other's cruelty. This time, however, the difference was that it was done on a website that is a popular media target for criticism.

And come on, the internet is the PRIME place for hiding your identity. You can do that on ANY site or forum. Example: I could deliver a nasty blow (I certainly wouldn't!) to someone on here via PM (s), and if I picked the right target, a similar result could occur if I persisted in the same sort of manner as that woman did, and my picture may not be real, my location may be made-up, and you'll never know my true identity (disregarding IP addresses).

My puppy from 1991 would have been alive if there wasn't such a thing as cars. Understand where I'm going?