Frustration

[Mrs.Clark]

I've been looking around on TTC for awhile now and have read many of your posts. I've had the urge to post this many times but, for one reason or another, chickened out. I feel like I need some advice or, at very least, words of encouragement. Here is our story...

In November 2006 my husband and I decided to try to get pregnant. We got pregnant RIGHT away! Yay! We told our families on Christmas and everyone was ecstatic. Then, on January 25th we miscarried. We were told "This happens to so many women and you will have a healthy baby in no time!". We took a couple of months to heal and re-group. We started trying again at the end of March. We didn't get pregnant again until November 2007. The story repeats itself at this point, only our miscarriage happened on January 27th. We were beyond grief-stricken. I went to the doctor had a full lab work-up and they didn't find anything wrong so we, once again, started trying. The doctors told us that they don't become concerned until you've had three miscarriages. We have yet to have another pregnancy. Last Monday I went to my gynocologist, who happens to specialize in infertility, and she had me go on Wednesday to have blood work done again and my husband also submitted a sample for analysis. I was impatient for the results so I called on Friday and the nurse said they had my results but the dr hadn't reviewed them yet so she couldn't tell me what they said. It is now Thursday and, even after SEVERAL phone calls to the Doctor's office, we haven't received any answers. At my initial appointment she said that I need to have an HsG test on day 7-10 of my cycle. This would be next Mon, Tues or Wed. I've yet to have a nurse call me back to schedule the test. I'm afraid we'll have to wait another month. We live in an area of Colorado that does not have very many REs. I googled it and the closest one is thirty minutes away and then the rest are more than an hour away.

I guess the worst part of all of this is that I don't feel like anyone I know can relate to what we are going through. Everyone around me is a fertile-mertle. Both of my sisters had two healthy babies before 18. I get super emotional everytime I see either of them with their kids, which I then feel guilty about. I am typically an upbeat person with a positive attitude but lately I've felt defeated. I see how much support you girls give to one another and it is so refreshing and encouraging.

I saw a post on here about "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" so I ordered that today. Hopefully it will help us. I apologize for the length of my post but it does feel refreshing to "get it off my chest".

[jenniletv]

First of all I am truly sorry about your miscarriages. I do understand the frustration of not being able to get pregnant right away. I have a very dear and close friend who had 4 miscarriages in a row. So the Drs finally figured out that she needed to be on a blood thinner and she would have to give herself a shot everyday the next time she got pregnant. Well she got pregnant again for the fifth time and she carried for 21 weeks and then when they went to see what they were having the baby had died. It was apparently a fluke, some chromosomal abnormality that could have happened to anyone. There was nothing they could have done to sustain the pregnancy had they found out earlier. It was a horrible experience for them and for all of us. She is now pregnant again - almost 7 weeks and she is doing the blood thinners again and will be monitored more closely. I guess I shared this story to tell you that there is hope and not to give up. But I know you don't want to hear "You will have a baby soon" or "your time will come". Sometimes that does not make anyone feel better about their situation. Trust me I know this. I just want to say please try to keep your head up and think positively no matter what the results.
My story is different. Dh and I starting trying in December 2007. I bought that book "taking charge of fertility" and began charting and taking temps, etc, like the book said. I even bough ovulations strips to tell me when I was ovulating but nothing. No positive pregnancy test for over a year. Then starting with my cycle in February of this year I said enough. I quit charting and trying to think about it and was even getting ready to make my infertility appointment when I got my positive test in May. I am not sure what was going on all that time before but it just happened. I think it was our time. God had a plan for us, like he does for everyone.
Please feel free to vent here all you want. That's what we are here for!

[LV Luvr]

^^ any update? I'm so sorry you had to go through that. I hope they contacted you back.

[Mrs.Clark]

Thank you for checking in LV Luvr I had my HsG test shortly after my post and everything looked ok. My left tube did look a bit blocked but not enough to cause concern (so says my Dr.). Fun little side note: my husband passed out when they were doing the test. He recovered quickly and gave us something to laugh about.A full five weeks after my blood tests and my husband's SA we finally got our results. I literally called three times a day...everyday...until they called me back. The nurse that finally called me back said that my husband has a low count and low motility. She told me we should seriously consider a local fertility clinic for IUI. She said there was almost no chance of us conceiving on our own. I thought that was weird given that we had conceived twice before on our own. Granted, those ended in MCs but we did conceive. Anyway, I finally got the Taking Charge of Your Fertility book in the mail and I have learned a TON from that book thusfar. We've decided to try for another year without medical help. He's taking vitamins, given up caffeine and stopped putting his laptop on his lap. Hopefully that will help. We are still young (24) so we have some time. After this next year, if we still haven't conceived we are definitely looking for another doctor.