Yet MORE wedding DRAMA!

  1. Ok…. My lovely man and I are planning our wedding … (this does involve lots of drinking and possibly valium ….) Planning these things is NOT easy, I have found that even tho your parents say “ It’s your wedding … whatever you kids want …” blah blah blah ……TRANSLATION : “whatever you want as long as its STILL what WE want” I am insistent about my Buddhist ceremony albeit . So far it’[s a real laid back plan , we are renting a house on the beach for the week, a sweet short informal ceremony, then a great big party with heavy appetizers all evening, something that reflects US . We are very lucky to be comfortable in life , and I am very grateful, of course there are always things we WANT but in reality I don’t need any more china , I have my Grandmother’s antique set, I don’t need bed linins or other things like that, I just was thinking that instead of our guests getting us gifts I announced to my Mom and Dad that I wanted to set up a fund for the St. Francis Society ( A No-kill shelter for cats and dogs ) that our guests can donate to , so they can give as much or as little as they want, so some of my friends who are still living pay check to pay check don’t feel bad about buying us the Ice Cream scoop. Mom Mom freaked out … she said it was the dumbest Idea she had ever heard … “ you just register at Saks … you will find things you need” I am surprised, I also got this reaction from many people …… what do you guys think ? Are folks really that materialistic? I mean is a wedding just a big lot fest even if you can afford the things yourself? :amazed:
     
  2. I think your idea is lovely! Stick to your plan! Stress how important this is to the two of you. Ultimately, it IS YOUR WEDDING! Make it what YOU want it to be!:yes: (If you don't, you'll regret it later)

    And big congrats!:flowers:
     
  3. I think your idea is WONDERFUL! :yes:

    Weddings are NOT about "how much loot can I get?". Weddings are about a commitment to each other and you guys clearly understand that.

    I love your idea. :flowers: If that's what you want to do..do it!
     
  4. I sat stick to your guns. So what if your mom and everyone freaks out? They'll get over it. Its your choice and tell them if anyone buys you anything your'e only going to get your money back and give it to the fund anyway. Bravo for such a noble choice BTW!
     
  5. Celesus, I think you had a wonderful idea and your parents should be happy with whatever makes you two happy. It is your wedding and you should celebrate your special day the way you want.

    Not only the found will do a great help, it gives your guests the opportunity to give as much as they can without feeling the need to spend a lot on an "appropriate" gift. I never thought about that. It's a great idea.

    You could try to explain to you Mom that you are happy with what you have and it would make you happier to help animals in need. Maybe she will understand. If not you will still enjoy your wedding ;).
     
  6. Congratulations on your upcoming wedding. I think your idea is wonderful. I am surprised you are not getting more support from your friends and family. I may be assuming, but it sounds like you are trying to focus more on the marriage than the wedding. I think the idea of the "marriage" gets lost for some when making wedding plans. Your idea of donation is so refreshing.
    Many well wishes and have a great party!
     
  7. Congratulations on your wedding!

    The problem with weddings nowadays is that many younger people getting married have different ideas than their older parents and relatives. This causes a lot of conflict.

    I think the charity idea is wonderful- but remember etiquette. Etiquette (if you think that's important) states that you should never assume you are receiving a wedding gift from someone you invite to your wedding. It is assumed that attendance at the wedding is enough of a gesture. For that reason, gifts or the lack thereof (ie "we prefer you donate to charity in lieu of gifts") should never be mentioned in the invitation. If people ask, then you can tell them informally. Bear in mind, there are older people, especially ladies, who take utter joy in buying a gift for the bride and groom. This may be what your Mom is driving at, even though she may not have articulated it very well. :p

    I wish you all the happiness in the world- and please, do an old broad a favor, please write thank you notes for any gifts you receive. It is a pet peeve of mine right now. I have been to several weddings in the past year, including that of our nephew and we have received not ONE thank you note from any of the couples. We gave generous gifts, one being of a substantial sum of money and I am :censor: insulted by the lack of acknowledgment. You sound like a thoughtful person so you probably already know better!
     
  8. Do what makes you happy! I plan on registering at LV if I ever get married. lol
     
  9. Gosh, registering was half the fun in the wedding planning. LOL :smile:

    As a wedding guest I LOVE going to the register to get gifts. I'd probably get a gift AND donate to the fund set up. Because I love to give gifts. So you might as well register for a few things to give people an idea as to your taste. Otherwise who knows what you'll get.

    But it IS your wedding! And it is just one day in the rest of your very long lives together. =D
     
  10. Celesus, congrats! Your idea is simply wonderful. Perhaps you could ask your family and friends (those who do not like your idea) to watch this slide - please turn up the volume:

    http://www.mirescue.com/

    Warm regards
     
  11. I think your idea is beyond sweet. If I was to be one of your guests, I be more than happy to give money to that.
     
  12. lovely idea. we've been to a number of weddings with a similar request and i am always happy to oblige (and impressed)!
     
  13. I think your idea is very sweet, and kind! I think if you really want that then stick with it, yes, your mom, and friends can freak out, but it is you who is getting married not them.So if want that, go for it, if you want to register at Saks, or any place you want go for it, as long as you are happy about it! Oh Congrats on your wedding!
     
  14. that is a great idea...:heart:
     
  15. Sorry i was away for so long ... I am happy that you guys are so supportive ! :shame: I know alot of tradition goes into weddings , and i am from an Old southern Family , i do agree with just going with what we want.... you ladies know it gets hard sometimes when you are the only girl ! LOL