WTF should I do? my Best freind has changed! (and just got me a fake?!)

  1. I have had this best freind fo ryears litterally since i was 5, we allways got along (obviously had a few tiffs) but we were allways had a strong strong freindship. last year he finished school (i am two years behind him so im still at school) He got a good full time office job doing HR in the city, since then he had been way way too busy to do anything with me or even call me! Now i felt i am understanding and when he blew me off for his work i thought ok he is busy (aparently he also takes his work home with him, i didnt know HR jobs were so involved but ill give him the benefit of the doubt since i dont personally know)
    So, we meet up about once a month for what is supossed to be lunch, but when i arrive he is sooo flooded with work that he only has time for coffee, (he doesnt eat lunch beacuse heis flooded with work and dieting) now i still give him the benfit of the doubt and think well, why would he lie? i dont think he has anything to achieve from standing me up, im just very PO becuase he tells me that when i have arrived in the city after a 45 min train ride, purely to meet up. I even had a fight with him over this, he promissed to put more effort into the friendship(i.e calling once a week or so) but i t hasnt really happened he started and now stopped doing it
    On the few times that we do meet up, i have noticed he has changed, he has taken on an arrogance, belittles me and is totally superfical. e.g. he would say; 'gosh im tired', I would say; 'yeah i know what you mean school gets tireing for me i allways have heaps of tests and assignments to do, I'm dreading going home cos i have so much'. he then would reply with something like, 'Well i work full time now so i get up at 5 and finish at 8, do you know how tireing that gets? its nothing compared to school gosh you have it soo easy there.' now thats him being nice!
    He then will talk about his work, and how he was invited to an internaional conference for his bussiness where the wokpaid for him to stay at a 5 star hotal for a week, and he was able to meet other workers around the world, and he go tone of the best rooms in the hotel .... and even bunked with the CEO! (the after sayign that he further belittles me by saying 'oh you know what a CEO is right?' as if im like 5!!!!) somehow i fail to belive that someone working in HR, in a bussiness for 4 months would get that kind of treatment but still i give him the benefit of the doubt, beacuae in some highly unlikely chance he could be telling the truth,
    He recently went on a trip to europe, and when he came back the only things he could tell me what how much he blew on this trip staying at the best hotels in paris, and blowing $10,000 shoping ($500 just on designer hats etc.), he even tried to convince me that he stayed at the 'Berj Al Arab' (the worlds only 7 star hotel, which pricing starts at around $10,000 pp per night) (mind you he make $40k a year so if he is telling the truth he should be in debt by now)
    the worst part of it is when he came back with presents, now i didnt ask nor expect any, but after smsing me and telling me about the fact that he splurged and bought me a prada wallet (meanwhile got me so excited about that) he comes hom eand when he gives it to me it turns out to be fake!, Now he knows where i stand on fakes and im honestly offended that he thought he could pull the wool over my eyes about this! I know i have expencive taste but that doesnt mean everyone around me is expected to match that with gifts they get me, he then furthermore claims how nice he is for getting me the wallet and that is was sooo expencive. what should i do? i dont know if i want to loose him as a friend but we are not the same as we were before Im not enjoying spending time around him, this is really hard becuase we have been friends for 12 years!!! and now this i hope he can snap out of it. sorry fo the long post i need to get it off my chest
  2. Since you guys have been friends for 12+ years, I think it would be a shame if you drop him. Try talking to him about this and see if he'll change his attitude a bit. It does sounds like he's being stuck up just because he's 2 years ahead of you and making $ while you're going to school. Chances are once you get out, you'll probably beat him financially. Then what will he say about that?
  3. yeah i see what you mean, i dont want to loss him as a friend but i feel like im not talking to the same person i knew last year, I rarely see him and when i do its very quick, i will probly confront him next time i see him.
  4. I so understand. The same sort of thing has also happened to me. I had this very good friend of many years, we were great friends and equals, but she suddenly got very jealous about me and my life and that's why she constantly started mocking my lifestyle and putting me down. She said I didn't understand her current situation in life and I could never understand, because I hadn't "experienced" as much of life as she had.

    I think your friend might be doing the same thing, and even though you have been friends for long, people do change and you don't deserve that sort of behavior from him. He is obviouslu constantly (but sneakily) putting you down. I don't think he has any respect for you. You should confide in him (even if it is for the last time) and tell him how you feel (very honestly) and if he doesn't listen, you should break of the friendship even if its hard. :sad: Im so sorry for you!
  5. Omg ruusu, that is exactly how i see it, i think he is jelous of me (i dont want to sound arrogant or anything but) i allways felt he was jelous of me because my family is a little well off, (he would compare his cars to our cars, homes to homes etc. when they really were not on the same page) but that has allways been around, and he allways tries to outbeat me, i.e. his family bought a brand new tv and watching tv was a whole better experience fo rhim than me, three years later we get a plasma, dvd recorder and surround sound, (which were better than his since the technology had evolved) when i told him he said 'finally, you splurged on a tv'. i just dissmissed the coments he made like that. but back then the friendship felt liek so much more. Maybe he feels that his job now puts him in a equal/higher place than me now, not that i care i try to remove my family and my financial situation from my friendships and almost all parts of life i try to be as down to earth as possible.
  6. well the burj is in dubai so if he said that's in europe :roflmfao:

    what ruusu says is good advice though.
  7. oh yeah i know its in dubai, sorry i forgot to mention that he stopped by dubai for 3 days on the way to europe to stay at the Burj. apparently
  8. wait are you a guy or a girl??? maybe he has feelings for you
  9. Im a guy, even if i wasnt can you explain what you mean?
  10. If you have been friends for years and years....that is priceless to me...fake wallet or not. I would say...are you serious dude??? Why did you give me a fake walllet?? Oh well...I love you anyway...Next time get the real thing...its a damn you love him??? Is his friendship worth working out??? If it...the material **** is so not important.
  11. maybe he likes you but he knows that it is impossible to start a bf gf relationship with you so he tries to push you away by being mean, but since you are a guy forget about it:jammin:
  12. obviously you didnt read the entire comment sunshine (i dont blame you its bloody long) its not the fact that he got me a fake wallet that i care about, it the other things he has changed he beltittles me and i dont enjoy spending time with him anymore. the fact that he got me a fake wallet offends me i feel as though he underestimated my inteligence to think that he could plam a fake wallet as a real one esp. with the superfical way he is acting, but all and all its not the wallet that im angry about its him
  13. If you've been friends for 12+ years you should know each other and be comfortable enough with each other that you can call him on his crap. Just be upfront and tell him you feel like the way he acts around you has changed and it makes you feel ________.

    Also, try to use statements that express how his attitude makes you feel. I learned a long time ago when my school made us all take "Conflict Resolution" classes, that people tend to get on the defensive mode if you say things like "You are acting arrogant, you never listen, you have changed". But if you give it a spin like "I feel that you aren't hearing what I'm saying" or "I become very disheartened when I feel like you're trying to act better than me" people tend to accept this news better.

    If he did care, in a romantic or friendship way, he would realize how his attitude is hurting you and feel bad.

    Good luck! Try and work things out. but sadly, sometimes people change and their priorities change...and suddenly 12 years of friendship can begin to mean very little.
  14. I read the entire thread....oh was just my opnion...if you are sick to death of him...then dont try and work it out.
  15. I think it time to for u to start pullung apart,seems u are not getting anything out of thei realtionship ...Sometime people changes