Why Does The Popular Girl Get It All?

  1. It's like any stereotypical school environment... obnoxious girl rules all. There's this girl I have a couple classes with and I can't STAND the sight of her! There's nothing really particularily special or attractive about her... she's pretty you could say, but in a very conventional way ie: blue eyes, golden hair etc. But then again I also have blue eyes and golden hair so this doesn't really mean anything. She's not outwardly friendly or anything, and if anything people feel uncomfortable around her, because she's one of those uptight people where everything has to be just so. She played on the varsity volleyball team, she's in national honors society, has a GPA higher than 4.0 etcetc. Just EVERYTHING about her makes my skin crawl and I don't know why. I feel like a horrible person for saying this but I can't help it. She has this demeanor about her, like an heir about her, kind of like she carries herself in a way where she sees herself better than other people. She's one of those people who'll only talk to you in certain situations, or if she thinks you're "good" enough to talk to. One of the lucky kids who got to have a nice car to drive to school in everyday in highschool.

    But back to my point, WHY does she always have everything? All of the guys at her feet wanting to talk to her. I've read before that a man likes a *****y girl because she puts him in his place, but WHY?

    I feel like the REAL beautiful girls with a warm heart and genuine spirit are the ones that are overlooked. And I can't stand that I have to see her several times a day. I cringe every time I see her. What's so special about her that makes her better than every other girl? What has she got that I haven't? I know that that's just life, but I can't stand the reality... it's hard to accept.

    SOMEONE please tell me that after high school/college none of this will matter anymore. My mom told me that growing up she dealt with this quite a bit. She said that there were the same type of people in her graduating class as the one I just described. And my mom also mentioned the same discomfort in their prescence. She also told me that at her 30th highschool reunion, she found that most of those "it" girls had amounted to almost nothing and ended up marrying rich businessmen out of convenience. They had satisfactory jobs but nothing spectacular, even though she was sure that they'd come out on top in the real world just as they had in their little highschool bubble.

    Oh, and for the record, my mother one-upped most of those girls anways. She is an NC STATE and UNC graduate, and was accepted into Harvard although she didn't go. She's a successful dentist and mother of 4 kids. If only that could be me someday as well! What a nice comeback, huh?:yahoo:

    Someone tell me I'm not a horrible individual for cooking up these spiteful thoughts...
     
  2. You are not horrible at all! I went through a similar experience in high school and one day I got the nerve to stand up to the "obnoxious, evil popular girl" and it was the most proud day of my life to date.

    She realized how awful she was treating people and finally stopped bullying people she thought were beneath her. Unfortunatly that kind of behavior doesn't stop in high shcool, I have learned from being in the "real world" for only less than a year that even in a professional work enviroment, women are still catty and mean.

    Good luck and standing up for yourself is the best defense you could ever use!
     
  3. Thanks for your response, princess! And you're right... standing up for yourself is the best defense! But you see, she doesn't outwardly bully me or anything else. It's just her demeanor that bothers me. And the fact that she's "in" with that small circle of the popular crowd. She has no real reason to be on top of everyone else. I'm just oblivious to it, maybe. I don't know.

    But I'd LOVE to hear your story of how you stood up to the class snob. Good for you! :tup:
     
  4. Trust me -- not a lot of people will tolerate this girl's behavior in the "real" world after high school and college.

    If you go to your high school reunions in 10 and 20 years, you will see that she hit her "prime" in high school and then hit rock bottom shortly thereafter. When I went to my last high school reunion it was so evident who peaked early and who didn't -- and those who didn't were the more successful ones with good careers, spouses and families.

    She is very short-sighted and she doesn't realize it. Someday it will hit her like a freight train. Mark my words!
     
  5. Believe it or not, you are going to come out with a more realistic and wise view of the world as a result of not feeling like you had it made. You're more prepared to handle the rotten stuff of life than a girl like that is. But you just won't know it until later in life.

    There's nothing I can say to make it better. Some people find their 'niche' -- something they are good at but these wonder-people are not. Just stick with it.
     
  6. You really need to change your perception of this girl.....because she is nothing special. It is that one can somehow be intimated by her that gives her the power. If you act like she means nothing to you, she does not have power. So you can actually talk to her but don't fall into the trap that she is all that.....
    Funny thing is that these so called "IT" girls of high school college are usually the ones that did nothing with their lives. Once they got in the real world they realized that people did not give a crap about them because they had nothing to offer as a person..... If you go to your high school 10 year reunion, they are the ones who are trying to recapture high school glory and usually married a guy who was a has been of the football team and their life really is not very exciting, while the other people who have had kindness and compassion for people they meet are surrounded with a great group of true friends, have interesting careers and a good family life. They only look towards the future and the good things it brings them.
    Don't waste your time worrying about her......move on, she is so not worth it.
    With age comes wisdom and you realize just how silly some things are when you thought they were so important to you when you were younger. You learn by experience, so move on.
     
  7. After high school when she enters college( or even if she does'nt go to college) she will realize and so will everyone else that SHE NEVER WALKED ON WATER................then time will pass and people will think to themeslves
    " Who was she? and what was the big deal about her and what does she do now?"
    Don't waste your time thinking about this girl, she probably lives for the
    idea that everyone would like to be her friend, .....be yourself and have a great time in high school, time goes by realy fast.
     
  8. I'm just going to add a little bit here. In my high school it was an "it" boy. He had everything. He was the prize winning pianist, he was the best singer, he had the highest GPA, he was an accomplished gymnast. The kid cound do everything and he knew it and most people couldn't stand him.

    it wasn't that he could DO all those things, but that he wasn't humble about them... Skip forward to 20 years (that's my upcoming HS reunion this summer) and he's been a Christian singer with local success. Somewhere along the way he came to a point where he WASN'T all that.

    I think that is the key. I kind of feel sorry for these "it" kids (I know, you don't get that), but I do. They aren't learning the lessons they NEEEEED to learn - how to treat people, how to deal with rejection, how to deal with failure. They don't EVER learn it or they learn it the hard way in college when it's truly sink or swim sometimes. Some really do learn and become "normal". Others just live in the past and never do much with their lives.

    I must say it is one of the BIGGEST reasons we moved to the school district we did. I have an exceptionally smart son. For the first four years he was the smartest in his class and we did NOT want him to get cocky about it or an uppity attitiude. Now he's in a Gifted full day program with the public school and he's NOT the best in everything which is making him be a better student and person. He's learning that NOW instead of later. it's why we insisted he stick with piano even though it frustrated him. He NEEDED to learn to deal with not getting something immediately and needed to learn that practice is important.

    Now, there is another question I wanted to address: Why do boys flock? Two reasons. One, she is the "it" girl, so like all "it" people, being associated with her raises her status. TWO, and more importantly, boys and girls are drawn to confident people. BELIEVE THIS. Even if you are fat and ugly (not saying YOU are, but just saying) but if you feel good about yourself and project confidence, you will be found attractive. It took me a long time to learn this for myself, but I did... The only reason I can explain why an overweight 23 year old was able to attract an "it" guy of sorts for my own mate. (though of the more intellectual "it" side! LOL)
     
  9. Unfortunately you will encounter these kinds of people at all stages in your life. The key is to just ignore it and work on your own personal success. I didn't see much of these kinds of kids in high school, but encountered a LOT of them in college. There were trust fund babies who relied on daddy's riches to get by in life. I was jealous to an extent because they had everything, but I soon realized that having a normal life is far more rewarding. When I purchased my first car I was so proud of myself for working so hard for something I wanted. So, it may suck now, but you have a much better head on your shoulders and will most likely succeed much more in life than the "it" people.
     
  10. I know exactly what you are talking about... Back in high school I felt the same thing, there was a girl who was blonde, beautiful, smart, homecoming queen, with the perfect clothes, came from money etc

    People like to cliche that status of being "cool" gets evened out when you get older and lots of times it does but sometimes it doesn't. I googled her and turns out she's still hot (didn't get fat or anything), plus she ended up marrying an NFL player who makes millions, plus she was working on her masters degree... She definitely didn't hit rock bottom, she's still gorgeous and has everything going for her.

    Personally, when I was younger I was always envious of those girls, I always wanted to be the hot, pretty, popular one, but I couldn't because when I was growing up we didn't have a lot of money so I wore ugly out of style stuff to school, and my mom never bothered to take me to the hairdresser so I ended up cutting my own hair and going to school with jacked up crooked hair. Also I was shy and weird. Obviously I wasn't the popular one.

    Now that I'm older (29) I found that money is a great equalizer. FOR ME at least (only from my experience, not a universal truth). I feel a lot better about myself now that I can buy expensive clothes, bags, pamper myself... It makes people think that I am cooler than I really am. I am still not "popular" and still don't have a lot of friends, but I think when people pass me by they don't think I am "uncool" anymore because I transformed myself. I also look very young for my age so I'm reliving my youth by buying things and enjoying finer things I couldn't when I was a kid.
     
  11. I know exactly what you are talking about too !!.

    I have just left High school for college and when I was in High school there was a girl exactly like this, so fake and annoying.

    Everyone would be so nice to her and say "I love your..." everyday. It annoyed the hell out of me. She also liked making a show of people infront of others and would do a false smile to EVERYONE.

    Now that I have left school I do not have to put up with her, she doesnt even go to the same college as me. One of my friends who goes this girls college says that she isnt the same girl she was, she met dozens of girls like herself in college and she is just the same as everyone now. Also I heard she was walking round in something VERY Unfashionable...made me laugh just thinking about it.

    I used to allways want to be as popular as this person when I was at school but now that I have left I know its not something I want. As long as I have friends then thats good enough for me. here in the UK we have to wear school uniforms so in school I couldnt come in dressed very nice but now Im at college, everyday is a fashion show for me LOL and there are alot more styles for me to wear. Im happy in college with my friends and how life is going :tup:
     
  12. Of course, some people really do seem to just "have it"...I know I'm biased, but my Dh is quite amazing. First, he's brilliant (PhD for the top business school in the world and he was considered one of the BEST students to go through). Two, he's a talented writer (for fun only), chess player (for fun only). He's funny and, to top it all off, he's handsome!!!

    His MOM is the worst. He's an only child and she is sooooooo full of him - centers her life around him. Yet, somehow, he's grounded. He's a great father. He's taken lower paying jobs just to do what he wants (not to gain fame and fortune) and I didn't know about all his "stuff" (successes) until WELL after I got to know him. It wasn't important to him to flaunt it.

    he is very confident and I suppose some people might find him overly confident, but only really insecure people. Most people really like him. I guess his only "can't do" thing is that he is a klutz and not an athlete - maybe that saved him from himself?

    I kid him.... he really is the kind of guy probably most high schoolers would hate... but for some reason they didnn't. I had a couple high school friends like that too... Somehow some stay grounded... while others get an over inflated ego.
     
  13. Don't worry... in a few years, this won't matter anymore, and usually the "studs" in high school are the ones who end up being losers and slobs later on! ;)

    Just be your true self, and the RIGHT people will realize that. You don't need anyone other than those people who appreciate you for who you are. Quality is better than quantity!
     
  14. In college/after college, it will mean nothing. I speak from personal experience. I wasn't *****y or rude like that in high school; I was friends with everybody and didn't have any enemies to speak of; but at the risk of sounding stuck up about it, I was in the "popular crowd." I did varsity cheerleading, drill and varsity softball and was on the homecoming court, etc. BUT. It was different at my HS, though; it was a very small school and everyone knew everyone and there wasn't any of this horrible haughtiness. Very small town, you get the idea.

    But once you get to college none of this "popularity" stuff matters. It doesn't matter how pretty or popular or "cool" you were in high school once you're out in the real world. For example, I went to the largest University in my state. The Homecoming Queen at the U of A wasn't "popular." Most people didn't even know who she was! I know I didn't. Universities-- and the world at large-- are just too big for "popularity" to become an issue.

    In the real world, your wits, talents and personality will carry you further than anything else, don't ever forget that!
     
  15. Did you see Romie and Michelle's High School Reunion? If not, go rent it. I love that movie.