What would you do?

  1. Hi everyone so in my other thread i asked everyone which name to pick Gaetano Nino and so on..So now i have to tell you guys a story and ask you guys what you would do !! I'm very upset about this and i need to get it off my head..So my cousin's wife was pregnant and having twins..I was at her baby shower which she didn't come because she was on bed rest..So when we were there my aunt went up to my daughter and asked her so whats your brothers name and my daughter told her Gaetano..And my aunt was like that is so cute she says it so perfect and all my other cousins and aunts asked me so did you and steve pick out the name and i say yes we picked Gaetano and everyone was like oh ok..So anyways my cousin's wife had her twins today they had a boy and a girl and they named the boy Gaetano WTF!!!! I'm so pissed i cried what would you guys do? Would you still use the name or find something else i'm just so mad because when i told them at the shower what i was naming my son no one said oh we were thinking about that too..I can't believe this and my husband is so mad..I just can't believe they would do that to me they knew..My mom told me to just still name the baby it if thats what i want (Which again is my mom's dad's name) because i'm not the one copying them but i feel like i am..Please Help!!! :crybaby::crybaby::crybaby:
     
  2. I say go ahead and name him Gaetano, you love the name. that would probably irk me a bit too.
     
  3. Honestly, you don't know if they "stole" the name or not. They could have been planning on that name too and that mom could have been in tears that night too thinking "What do we do, we both want that name!" You just don't know.

    My question is: do you have a lot of contact with this family and will the kids be mingling a lot? If yes, you may want to think of a nickname to use for your Gaetano, but really, you don't need to change the name.

    This happened to a friend of mine and she actually KNEW the name was 'stolen' and she was upset about it for quite awhile... and it wasn't the name so much, but that there was no discussion about it, like, "X, when I heard the name you liked and wanted to name your child, I just instantly fell in love with that name. I can't stop thinking about it... I know I don't need to ask permission to name my daughter what I want, but I don't want there to be hard feelings about it." and then letting things unfold from there.

    In your case... was there much time between this shower and the twins' birth? Probably not!

    I'm sorry it happened, but really it's not the end of the world.
     
  4. How frustrating! You chose a nice name, a bit unusual, which is nice. Just proceed as you plan, but be open to other possible names. Maybe you will find a different one that you like. If not, grin and bear it. Your children will be different reflections of their name.

    I had a similar situation with my dear sister -- every time she heard I was trying to get pregnant, she got pregnant first!!!! 3 times!!! Each of her kids is a few months older than mine. Even my mother said she was trying to "steal my thunder."
     
  5. Awww That's a shame! I would be pissed, especially if you think she did it on purpose. I don't know what I'd do if I were in your situation, but if you really love the name, just go ahead and do it.
     
  6. I would name him the name you picked out for him, no matter who else was named that.
     
  7. That would make me angry and upset too. However, like berryblondeboys says, maybe they had 'picked' the name too - but if that was the case then someone should have said something at the shower.

    I say go for it and still use the name, it's obvious that you and your husband love the name and have probably gotten used to calling your bump that already. Don't let it put you off.:flowers:
     
  8. I'm just a little upset because that was my grandpa's name and my dads name is Gaetanino and i was doing it in both there honor..And to Berryblondeboys for you to tell me it's not the end of the world yes sorry for me it is a big deal when i'm at there shower and they ask me what name did you guys pick and i tell them and they don't say like oh we were thinking that too..If they would have said that then i wouldn't be so upset but to just do the name after i told them thats a slip in the face!!! So yeah i'm sorry but it is kinda a big deal to me when it's my grandpa's name and my dad's name..It hurts because it's not like my cousin not to say anything like oh really we were going to do that name too he is very kind and respectable but not his wife she is a you know what so thats why i say they did it after i told them the name..I just can't understand..Everyone tells me to just do the name anyways but does that look like i copied them? Thats how i feel :crybaby:
     

  9. Thank you thats what i'm saying why didn't any of my aunts or cousins say oh they were thinking of that name also then it would be ok..But for no one to say anything not even the father that is you first born son your telling me that he wouldn't say we picked that name..Yeah and we have been calling my bump it and my daughter calls it too..She say my little brother Gaetano all the time..And everyone kept getting a kick out of my daughter saying the name at the shower asking her whats your baby brothers name and she says it..
     
  10. I would be upset too. It was an underhanded thing that they did. If you and your hubby love the name, still go ahead with it. She's probably expecting you to name your son something else. Don't do it. Its a beautiful name and it means more to you than it does to her.
     
  11. Was this be her grandfather too? IF that is the case, she was just trying to do what you did - honoring her grandfather.

    I agree.. it's not nice that she didn't tell you and that's what I said... if she would have explained or handled it better, then maybe.

    Why don't you call her or go see her when you've calmed down. WHATEVER happens with the name, hard feelings have already been created... the longer neither side talks, the worse it is.


    I
     
  12. No she is my cousins wife..Yes that is my cousins grandpa not her grandpa also and i can understand that he wanted to do the same thing but when i was at the shower he asked me "So did you and Steve pick out a name yet and i say yeah we picked Gaetano we love the name and my daughter is sticking to that name also". And he was like thats good me and her can't come to agreement on a name. So if he had that name in mind why didn't he say oh really we were talking about that name also..Thats not like him to not say anything he's very kind and sweet which makes it very odd to me..I really wouldn't be pissed if they said they were thinking about the name also. But last night when i get a texted message saying boy and girl boy name Gaetano what would you think!! I just cried..
     
  13. Boy... I keep trying to think of a way to see the other side (it's what I always try to do) and it's getting harder and harder.... it really does seem like they heard the name and thought Wow... what a good idea!

    is it POSSIBLE that your cousin didn't tell his wife that it was a name you were considering? He just kind of said, "hey, what about naming him Gaetano after granddad?

    And to be honest, I bet you, if he did that, he didn't think TWICE about having two babies in the family with that name. Guys don't get uptight about that stuff like women do... and if she didn't know your intentions... then... she woul dprobably say "OK - sounds good"... and hurting you without realizing it. Now, if she knew too... Boy... I would be crying too.
     
  14. The thing is she is a total ***** my cousin wishes he didn't marry her and he says it because she thinks she is a princess and she always has to get her way and when i say always i mean always..She tells him what to do thats why i think she was like oh well i can give a **** i can see her doing that..I bet my cousin had some other names picked out but knowing her she was like i don't like them the only one you can have is Gaetano..Because knowing my cousin he wouldn't of picked that name he would have picked his dads name which is Ron. He is very close to his dad and i know that was his first pick and she said no..
     
  15. I am so sorry that you are going through this! I know I would be really really upset if the same thing happened to me. I even felt kind of annoyed when one of my friends "stole" my favorite little girl name for her dog (and I'm not even pregnant yet)! I think you should stick with the name you picked - it is beautiful and meaningful to you and your family. And there will be so much more to your son's life than hanging out with that one family member with the same name, know what I mean? He will probably grow up to be so proud to have such a special name that it won't matter to him (or anyone else) if your cousin's wife copied it from you. :flowers: