What changed after you got married?

  1. What things changed once you and your SO got married (or the equivalent of getting married, such as moving in together, sharing $$)? Is there some things you used to do before you got married that you can't really do now, because of lack of time or other reason? Did getting married change the dynamic of your relationship, and for better or worse?
     
  2. I honestly think that when we first meet our SO ..there is a lot of buzz..and yes..it simmers down...BUT we also grow closer together thru all our experiences(good and BAD!) and still remain best friends! My hubby..despite his PHH title is a super sweet guy and an amazing daddy...Our relationship changed when we had a child..BUT only in a different way.I was amazed at how great a daddy he was and so proud of the way he looks at his daughter(yes..she is a tad spoiled!). We change and do things differently than when we met...but only for the better! I have learned...from good and bad...that respect and trust are the glue behind a marriage.If you dont have thoses 2 things...DONT GET MARRIED!I would never ever doubt or not trust my hubby ever....and I love him..even after 10 years...more than ever.
     
  3. I wouldn't say marriage itself changes things, but CHILDREN definitely do. You have much less time for each other since it's devoted to the kids. Some marriages can't handle that.

    I must say that one thing that's helped my marriage (7 years so far) has been seperate bank accounts. What's his is his and what's mine is mine. We split all the bills and whatever we have left, we're free to do with what we please.
     
  4. Me and my partner haven't had chrildren (yet!) but we moved in together only 5 months into the relationship. Risky I know but we were madly inlove.
    Our love has gotten stronger. We also have HUGE fights but much bigger happy times. I can say we are 95% happy and 5% of the time we argue.

    I have never felt more happy, secure and mentally stable in my life. We have become best friends, where if we do not share an experience or tell each other what we/saw/hheard/laughed at/ate its not quite complete. We have been together a mare 10 months, but we are together everyday and most of the day. Our sex life hasn't sufferd eiter, the way people said it would.

    I know it is the begining, the honeymoon shall we say, of the relationship but we spend 20hrs of the 24 a day together 7 days a week. And it's wonderfull. We plan to marry begining of next year. I can't wait.
     
  5. I married my best friend so it only got better! I am sure that being friends first (I'm talking strictly "friends" - nothing at all romantic for years) helps our marriage because we know each other so well inside and out.
     
  6. well my hubby and I moved in together very soon after we met , then ended up having our first baby before we were married so nothing really changed once we did decide to get married. We still decided to get married because we loved each other though. Not because we thought we had to. I guess we did things in the wrong order but it worked out!! And we are still happy after 5 years now.:smile:
     
  7. We definitely take problems more seriously. When people just live together, there is a more flippant attitude about working on relationship issues because of the ease of just being able to walk away. When you're married, you both have more invested emotionally and otherwise so I believe you work on the relationship and tackle problems more readily (in healthy relationship at least).
     
  8. Wow, everyone has such nice things to say! And everyone else who can probably name a bunch of bad things are keeping their mouths shut...very wise! :biggrin: including myself... We're so great together la la la la la *skips through a field* hehe
     
  9. I think the things that changed are how i see myself and it's funny in many ways I'm more independent since I got married like I'll check in with my husband if i'm out late

    but then again i work full time and in grad school at nite so late is 11pm and he knows i'm not a party girl
     
  10. I became happier than I've ever been in my whole life! Every day just gets better and better!

    I feel so blessed!
     
  11. Since we lived together for a number of years prior to getting married, there weren't many changes. I pretty much knew what I was walking into and did it anyways because I love him so much. I will be honest, we have definitely had our share of difficult times, but (not be cheesy) the love we have for one another keeps us together.:heart: We have never in our ten years together fought about money, which I think is a miracle.

    The biggest change we experienced was having our son. My husband had never even held a baby before ours and he was not helpful for about the first 6-8 months.:mad: That caused a major rift between us. He did eventually get better and is now very good with him.

    We have many married friends between the two of us and we are almost the only couple who is not separated or getting divorced.
     
  12. How have things changed.....Less sex, more housework! LOL

    Just kidding my DH is great I have managed to pretty much break any bad habits I couldnt live with. Husbands definately dont come from the factory ready to go, they take alot of fine tuning and tweeking! LOL
    Selena
     
  13. I can't say much changed for us, since we lived together for 3 1/2 years before marraige. I just think there was a deeper sense of committment.
    Arguments (not that they were ever excessive) became more like discussions, since neither of us really wants to go anywhere. I guess I feel like we face challenges and decisions a little more unified. Also, both of our families have accepted the fact that we have a permanent relationship. We had some rocky roads with my mother as previously discussed.
    My husband still likes to drive me crazy teasing me and at times we are still in the "fine tuning and tweeking" stage as Selena discussed above. I wonder if that ever gets completed, it may be a life long process.
     
  14. For my husband and I, A LOT changed. We had not lived together previous to our marriage--and he is in the military so we weren't really even used to a normal relationship at all. We were always apart, so a lot of things changed.

    We both noticed a lot of things that we didn't notice before about each other. Like the fact that I am the most spoiled brat ever:love: . lol. I don't think he realized how messy I was and how I never pick up after myself and I never realized what a neat freak that he was. Nothing major--just things you kind of expect, you know?

    AND when you fight, you realize that things are either a BIG deal--or they mean nothing. You don't fight over stupid things as much...because you're married and you realize, there's really nothing you can do. Lol you're STUCK. Haha. jk....kind of....lol

    And of course my parents won't buy me bags anymore--so now I have to talk him into doing it instead.
     
  15. This was a really interesting thread to read!