venting

  1. I have to vent.

    I guess my hubby is also unhappy. He was the one who introduced me to the world of luxury bags and I think he is now regretting. :sad:


    I know I am starting to love luxury bags and one bag costs a bomb. I know that bags are bags and they are just bags. I only hope (and I really hope I only hope that) to get one nice luxury bag for work.

    Eversince we started looking at high-end bags, he started to make hurting remarks. Remarks like 'this is not expensive enough for you', 'I should hide the price tag.', 'nowadays you only look at expensive bags.', 'not good enough for you because it is not expensive'.... etc etc.:crybaby:

    I feel so sad whenever he says that. It has been at least 4 occassions he said that. Sometimes I brushed it off, sometimes I feel like crying. Like now. I talked to him before on this, but words like these didn't disappear.

    I haven't buy one luxury bag myself. The only high end bag I have is from hubby. If I ever buy, it will be my own money. And he knows that I won't rely on him.

    Can't guys be kinder in words? I have a brain, I can think. Is there a need to use to such hurting remarks? I know words like these are truths. But it is really hurting.

    Am I over-reacting? :cry:
     
  2. I don't know if you're over reacting...I would probably be upset too. My exboyfriend used to say the same thing to me when we were shopping, because I said on a few occasions "Oh, that bag is so cheap!" and "God, that cheap bag is so gross!". I didn't mean it to come across as "it wasn't good enough for me", I meant it more in the way that the quality wasn't something I would want to spend my money on :sad:
     
  3. Obviously, he just doesn't get it. If you can handle your bag obsession on your own (meaning you have your own disposable income and it won't affect him in any way if you indulge every once in a while), then perhaps the bag thing is something that you should enjoy alone. If you depend on him for expensive bags, then unfortunately, you'll probably have to be subjected to his opinions/remarks until you find a way to get the bags on your own.
     
  4. You need to make it clear to him that he's hurting you by saying these things.

    Honestly, my boyfriend used to say hurtful things about bags too...

    Now I buy my own stuff and he has no say in what I spend my money on.
    Plus, if it makes even just one minute of your day happy, then why not? Money is meant to be spent on things you'll enjoy.


    This is also why I dont' think we'll be getting joint bank accounts anytime soon LOL
     
  5. I think some men just don't get the whole handbag obsession. I would tell him, kindly, to knock off with the comments.

    On a separate note, I was at Kohl's over the weekend with my husband. I wandered over to the handbag department and some of the bags were $16. I went to the dressing room, where my husband was trying on clothes, and reported there were handbags in the store for $16. He was thrilled and thought I wanted one. When I told him otherwise, the man in the dressing room next to him started to laugh.
     
  6. My BF would only say something like that if it's really pricey or out of my range or he knows I will think about how it cost later on. I bought most of my bags with my own money. A handful came from him as gifts and I appreciate that.
     
  7. I believe you and ur husband is a team and i'm sure he doesn't mean to hurt you.. maybe just being sarcastic.. my DH always remark on my limited edition LV obsession and now Hermes!.. when we go shopping and he point out a nice lv bag he immediately remark "oh wait its not limited edition!!" and i just say.. no its not!.. i try not to take his remarks in a negative way cause I'm sure he's just being sarcastic but not hurtful!.. in the end if your husband is the one buying high end bag then he knows u only deserve luxury bags :smile:

    Just a thought.. maybe its just you feeling guilty about bag obsession.. its the same with me.. but then i brush it off with a list of how to save money without putting my DH into deep debt lol
     
  8. thanks, everyone, for your replies. :heart:

    I know he doesn't mean to hurt me, just that words didn't come out friendly from his mouth.

    And yes, Pinkish_Love, I feel guilty for wanting these luxury bags. We both know I can afford these bags but I guess perhaps he didn't like the idea of me 'chasing after' these high end stuff.

    Strangely, hubby is more supportive when it comes to jewellery and watches.

    Just hope I can cool off soon.

    **hugs** to you lovely ladies for being here
     
  9. men are idiots.

    my husband makes comments about my bags. he also gets crazy when I buy a new purse.

    I don't think it's a rpice tag it's about in context and also realizing that the comments and things may bother you but he would talk the same way to his friends.

    I find with my husband that there are timeswhere he is so comfortable with me that it angers me because i find what and how he says things completelty unacceptable.
     
  10. maybe that is his form of foreplay
     
  11. Unless he's saying it in a bad tempered way, I think he's just teasing you.

    Find something about him (shouldn't take too long, if he's like most men! ;) ) and tease him back! :biggrin:
     
  12. Giggle**
    Good idea, chloehandbags! And Prada, you made me smile. :smile:

    Hubby apologised yesterday and explained that he was teasing me. I told him it was not funny. :rant: And he promised not to do that anymore.

    So I guess we are fine now. The art of marriage............ so difficult!! :p
     
  13. Glad you've both worked out your differences! :biggrin:

    Still think you should tease him back, just a little, though! :lol:
     
  14. Kkekkekeke.... I feel so too. :roflmfao:
     
  15. My boyfriend has a hard time keeping his mouth shut, he really doesn't like the bag purchasing I do all the time. He's threatened to "stage an intervention," and it's hard to know when he's kidding and when he's serious. I know he could say more than he does, and I appreciate the self control he imposes to choose more important battles than this one, but sometimes he can't contain it and he just goes off. Your hubby may not be able to help but make little comments because either he genuinely worries about the cost or he might just think the whole thing is silly. I'm sure he doesn't mean to hurt you, and I'm glad you guys seem to have worked it out.
    I agree that you should find something he does that you find silly and tease him back a little. Give him a taste of his own medicine!