My mom sent me this the other day and thought it was cute... hope you enjoy! "True Friendship" (With none of that Sissy Crap!!!!) 1. When you are sad -- I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you that way. 2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you. 3. When you smile -- I will know you finally got laid. 4. When you are scared -- I will rag on you about it every chance I get. 5. When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining. 6. When you are confused -- I will use little words. 7. When you are sick -- Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don't want to catch whatever you have. 8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass. 9. This is my oath..... I pledge it to the end. "Why?" you may ask? "Because you are my friend". Friendship is like peeing your pants: everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth. And remember....when life hands you Lemons, get some tequila and salt and THEN call me!