True eloquence from Larry the cable guy!

  1. thought y'all could use some goofiness :p

    The wisdom of Larry the Cable guy.......
    > >
    > > 1. A day without sunshine is like.. night.
    > >
    > > 2. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
    > >
    > > 3. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
    > >
    > > 4. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
    > >
    > > 5. Remember, half the people you know are below average.
    > >
    > > 6. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
    > >
    > > 7. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
    > >
    > > 8. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the
    cheese
    > in
    > > the trap.
    > >
    > > 9. Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.
    > >
    > > 10. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
    > >
    > > 11. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
    > >
    > > 12. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
    > >
    > > 13. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.
    > >
    > > 14. OK, so what's the speed of dark?
    > >
    > > 15. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
    > >
    > > 16. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
    > >
    > > 17. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
    > >
    > > 18. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines
    > >
    > > 19. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?
    > >
    > > 20. Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
    > >
    > > 21. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering, "What the
    > hell
    > > happened?"
    > >
    > > 22. Just remember -- if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off.
    > >
    > > 23. Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear
    bright
    > > until you hear them speak.
    > >
    > > 24. Life isn't like a box of chocolates . it's more like a jar of
    > > jalapenos. What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
     
  2. :yes: :yes: :yes: LOVED IT!
     
  3. lol, good laugh!
     
  4. Very funny. Thanks for posting!
     
  5. These are my faves! :roflmfao: :roflmfao:
    I saw this guy at a comedy club here. He was hilarious!
     
  6. Who doesn't love jokes from the world's richest redneck? :p
     
  7. SO funny!
    i like the one about the mouse in the trap.
     
  8. :lol: thanks for sharing this!
     
  9. that's fantastic!!! thanks for posting!
     
  10. :roflmfao: :roflmfao: :roflmfao: :roflmfao: Too funny! Thanks for sharing!
     
  11. Fantastic!! Thanks for posting that.
     
  12. I love Larry the Cable Guy. Thanks for posting his quips.
     
  13. :roflmfao: :roflmfao: :roflmfao: Thanks for posting!
     
  14. Thought the Forum could use some lightening up!:yes:
    Hope it made you smile! :biggrin:
     
  15. ^^thanks swanky! :lol: