http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/femail/article.html?in_article_id=487371&in_page_id=1879 Camilla's hair goes white ... Is it because of the 'third person' in HER marriage? By GEOFFREY LEVY and RICHARD KAY - Last updated at 21:38pm on 12th October 2007 By now she should have been comfortably established in the royal tableau, perhaps not loved but the object of quiet and even warm acceptance, growing on the nation. But two-and-a-half years after marrying the Prince of Wales, that's not how it has turned out for the Duchess of Cornwall. The cordial relationship she briefly achieved with the people has reverted to being decidedly uneasy. Her relief that their resentment had receded has been replaced by renewed fears that they see her as a usurper. Only now it is worse, for she is seen to have supplanted "the best mother in the world" - in 23-year-old Prince Harry's emotional words. How right the former Mrs Camilla Parker Bowles was when, months ago, she confided to her friends: "This is becoming Diana's summer - how will I get through it?" That observation has already become a serious understatement. For as the inquest into the death of Diana and Dodi sets itself to rumble on week after week at the High Court, it is already Diana's autumn, is becoming Diana's winter and will be Diana's spring as well. Those who prefer the power of fate over coincidence may even find a touch of poetic justice in the possibility that the inquest jury's verdict could come, with all its attendant headlines and hysteria, around the time Charles and Camilla celebrate their third wedding anniversary on April 9. None of this would be the case but for the bizarre decision to disturb the oil liberally poured over the Royal Family's troubled waters during the preceding years by holding a memorial service to mark the tenth anniversary of Diana's death. It may have been William and Harry's idea, but future historians will have a field day dissecting the muddled thinking of palace planners, the Prince of Wales's determination to have Camilla by his side in the Guards Chapel as Diana's life was celebrated, and Camilla's 11th-hour decision - undoubtedly forced on her by public opinion - to stay away. How eerily silent the Duchess seems to have been since that day six weeks ago. Since then, she has been barely visible. A disappearing duchess whose appearance yesterday with Charles at the dedication of the Armed Forces Memorial at Alrewas, Staffordshire, was her first formal public outing for weeks. Scroll down for more ... Princes Charles and Diana on their wedding day. Diana famously said she felt there were three people in her marriage .... ... Could Camilla, pictured here on the day of her own wedding to Charles, now be feeling that there are three people in HER marriage? While getting over the Guards Chapel crisis, she has been doing a lot of thinking, some of it at her old home, Raymill House, which she insisted on keeping when she married Charles. It has become her occasional bolt-hole from the restrictions of royal protocol and Charles's pernickety habits. Since the Diana service debacle, she has spent time both alone there and with Charles at Birkhall, in Scotland, licking her wounds and recovering her composure. Becoming a grandmother has helped. Her son Tom and his wife Sara had a daughter, Lola, on Tuesday, and daughter Laura is pregnant. It is said to have been in the relative tranquillity of Raymill House that the former wellington-booted and scruffy-haired Mrs Parker Bowles decided she had to try to make a fresh start with the British people. That would please palace advisers worried by her slip in public regard. And, as with most women, the obvious way to start was with her hair. For years she opted for the style favoured by Charles - a conventional blonde, modelled on the style of Hollywood star Farrah Fawcett from her Charlie's Angels days. Ten days ago, accompanied by Laura, the Duchess arrived at her hairdresser's in London's Mayfair. When she emerged three hours later, her hair was so many shades lighter as a platinum blonde that, for a moment, onlookers thought she had reverted to her natural grey. It is no coincidence that Camilla admired Helen Mirren's platinum tresses on television when the actress stepped up to receive her Oscar for playing the Queen in the film that depicted the Royal Family-during the tumultuous week of Diana's death. That, too, was an episode when she stepped into the wings and kept diplomatically out of sight for weeks. So has that age-old female confidence booster, a new hairdo, helped? According to one of her close friends, the answer is a gloomy "No". Camilla is already regretting it, and friends say it "makes her look ten years older". She was 60 in July. "The service for Diana was a disaster for Camilla, but in her mind the inquest is even worse because it seems to be endless," observes one close figure. "It's Diana, Diana, Diana all the time." Yesterday's dedication of the new memorial was, of course, a solemn occasion; hardly a day for the Duchess to attempt to breach the widening gap between her and the public with smiles and her usual easy banter. But the sombre mood was fitting for other, rather more personal reasons. For - unusually for the couple whose love affair began 35 years ago - behind closed doors there have been frictions between her and Charles. "There are tensions that never existed before," says one figure. "These can be so unpleasant that she keeps out of his way. They see less of each other. And when things are really bad, she has Raymill House to go to. "You could almost say the problem is because there are virtually 'three people' in her marriage. "These days she only has to hear Diana's name to disappear - she can't bear it. And she blames Charles. She feels that if it wasn't for him insisting on her accompanying him to the Guards Chapel, she would never have got into that awful mess that has caused her so much embarrassment and heartache." No one is suggesting the marriage is in serious difficulties, merely that they are going through a rocky patch that has its roots in the Diana service. says an old friend. "And when Camilla sulks, nothing much gets done."