"The Family Ring" what if you don't like it?!?!

  1. Hey girls, I was just curious on your thoughts concerning recieving "the family ring" as your engagement ring (as in your husband's mother's ring) which has been passed down. What if you really don't like it and its dated and really not your taste. How would you react. Also, if your mother in law is giving up her ring, what is she left with??? Stories, thoughts, responces?:confused1:
     
  2. Hmm.... Is it possible that you can take the diamond out of the older ring and put it into a new setting?

    I think your mother in law to be would be insulted if you turned down her ring... but in the end, it has to be YOUR ring.. that YOU have to wear... maybe express your feelings to your fiancee.
     
  3. Just say that you couldn't possibily take it because then what will she wear? Also I think you should just tell your finance its too 'flashy' or too 'simple' for you and that you've always had a certain dream ring. If they insist have the stone reset.
     
  4. that's what i would do. i might even wear it for a while and have it reset for an anniversary. then it's more "look what a wonderful present i got" not "i hate your ring"

    i think it would really hurt her feelings if you didn't take it. plus she could have been looking forward to this for YEARS...it might be the only way she can get an upgrade from HER husband without hurting HIS feelings, you know?
     
  5. ^^ Haha, didn't even think of that! Good points
     
  6. Just take it with a HUGE smile and lots of appreciation. Then talk later about resetting it or getting a new one as a valentine's gift or something.
     
  7. NEVER change the diamond because it isn't big enough, though. That would be a big slap in the face to his family. It's supposed to be this great honor your fiance is giving you a ring that's been in his family. If you're not too fond of the ring, maybe change the setting into a pendant or something.
     
  8. I would love that. OMG b/f's mothers ring has beautiful. Dont think its going ot happen anytime soon as its still on her finger :sad:
     
  9. What kind of ring is this anyways? Honestly you're the one who has to look at it everyday, she got to pick out her ring, why can't you pick yours?
     
  10. repeat!
     
  11. "It's just too much, with my haphazard mind I would be so scared to absent mindedly loose such an important family heirloom, especially when just last week I lost my college ring (or another ring that is of importance to you and she seen you wear, or another piece of jewelry.),and I couldn't live with the guilt. Maybe can you hold onto it for a while, and when you truly feel like I'm ready for such a precious piece of your own family history, instead of being between husband and wife, it could be a ring I can wear to symbolize the bond I have with my mother in law" although you can tone it down to whatever she'll believe lol. :flowers:
     
  12. I ended up with my husbands grandmothers diamond she passed it to him before she passed away. It was reset but it is gorgous! They don't make them like this anymore, flawless, crystal clear and over a carat! I wouldn't trade it for anything! :love:
     
  13. First, the common sense advice:

    What do _you_ want to do with it? Have you spoken with your husband about it? That's what I'd do. I'd get some ideas and present them to those with whom I felt the most comfortable bringing it up with first -- husband, mother-in-law...

    I'd also keep in mind, though, that it _is_ a family heilroom, and be respectful of their feelings as well. Worst case situation, you could ask your husband to buy you a second ring "for daily wear." ;)

    That's what my cousin is doing. He's given his fiancee the standard one stone engagement ring, which he figures she'll think is too flashy to wear, and then a more conservative three stone ring for daily wear.
     
  14. I'd take it with thanks and a smile, then pick out a fabulous wedding band that I loved and wear only that daily after marriage. ;)
     
  15. I LOVE Antique and Estate jewelry. I platinum engagment ring and wedding band are both circa 1920s and are simply smashing. I get more compliments then you could ever imagine.