sharing your H bags

"She used to work at Saks 5th Ave and everytime the employees would have double discount wkds, OMG she and i would stock up on handbags galore!!!"

She can't be all bad if she shared her discount with you? :sad: Or was this before she moved in? Either way, must be hard. So more reason to let loose and PARTY!!!!!!:wlae::lol::upsidedown::yes:
 

She can't be all bad if she shared her discount with you? :sad:


I agree. She also cook for you and your DH too. I would not want to live with MIL or FIL or My own parents. But since you have to live with her, you should make her love you and try to win her heart. Not by lending her your bags, but do something nice to her once in a while from your heart. :heart: And I am sure she will see it. The way she is now is because she is jealous of you taking the love from her son. It's like you both competing with each other without knowing it. But you have to show her that you love her like your own mom and I am sure everything will get better.

I am asian and I got so many complaints from my own mom with all of her four DILs. I know all she needs is just for DILs to care and respect her and be nice to her, buy her something sometime. And she would not complain much anymore. (but still complain) I understand sometimes it's too much but just do it for your DH. I know you are a such a sweet person but please try a little harder. :yes:

I think it is a good idea to buy her an Hermes bag. Maybe tell your DH to pay for it and tell her it is from you. :tup: Eventhough she wouldn't take good care of her bags, it's ok, they're hers. But don't lend any of your bags to her. Tell her nicely that you don't like to share your things. :yes:

I hope I say it right here. I just want you and your family to be happy. :smile::smile: All the best! :drinkup:
 
PBC: Awww, I feel ya sweetie--you are amazing and I'm sure your DH understands what a challenge having MIL live with you :heart: And the crab pic is funny as hell! I can imagine my MIL asking the same thing.......but she'd ask me to put them in my bag!!!

My DH is 1 of 5 kids, however he is the F A V O R I T E (DH is Philippino and shares his father's middle name...so considered the Jr.). I was even warned by his sisters when we were dating that he is the favored and he is a mama's boy too--and he will do anything for his mom---that has changed slightly over the years! He won't drive to her apt. at 10pm at night to help her with her VCR now! However we are lucky that we don't have her living with us----yet. She still has her own practice so she is very dedicated to her work....however, she NEEDS to stop working or at the very least slow down A LOT--she still works 6 days a week 10 + hour days and her health is drastically suffering because of those hours. Anyway, we are the only one's she has casually, asked to live with. Almost asking like, SHE'D be doing US a favor to move in---when she is ready----and on her terms. In fact my one SIL is giving us MAJOR MAJOR grief about us moving to China for DH work and how this is going to be too hard on MIL and how she (my SIL) will have to handle MIL now (she tries to do as little as possible when it come to her mom---they DO NOT get along).


So keep your chin up. Maybe you might be able to find a red bag for her while in Vegas! Or maybe you might be able to find her a used Kelly on Ebay.
 
I don't think this is specifically about H bag at all, as pbc feels that the MIL only want her bag just because it's hers. Buying a H for the MIL will only cure the symptom for a while, but won't solve the root of the problem. I mean, LV suhaili & bottega etc are really high range bags too, I'm sure it's not about the money.

I have a thought. Maybe she is just trying to strike a conversation with you, pbc? By using a topic that you like? In which case that's not so bad, yeah?

I have to deal with my MIL too and am slowly exploring the ways to get along. :hysteric:Actually for me, buying things for her just makes her get on my case more often, so it backfired. :cursing: Thankfully DH is on my side, so I have it easier than you, pbc.

Best wishes!:drinkup:
 
PBC, hang in there! I understand as I have a judgemental/manipulative MIL as well (oh, she's also super-frugal, doesn't like to eat out, vacation, etc.) She basically thinks our lifestyle is too "extravagent" just because we often eat out and have a house-cleaner/landscaper. Imagine if she knew how much I actually spend on bags! Thankfully, we don't live together and she's a lot closer to DH's younger brother. My SIL is just dreading the day when she'll move in with them, as it's pretty much a given when she gets older. My DH doesn't take her bull and is a "tell it like it is" type of guy, so she doesn't really like to come around our place too much.

Getting back to your question on bags, HELL NO would I let her or anyone else for that matter, borrow my H bags.
 
If my MIL would have ever asked to borrow any of my bags (EVEN CROC) I would have said YES IN A HEARTBEAT without even thinking of it. I love her so much and material things do not replace the love I have for that woman. It's the same as asking if you would ever lend a bag to your mother.

To me that would make someone selfish. She gave birth to the man that spoils you, no matter what you think of her or how you feel about her the bottom line is she is your husbands mother. Thank her for giving you such a precious gift.

I know MIL's can be testy but it is up to you to learn to deal with them.
 
If my MIL would have ever asked to borrow any of my bags (EVEN CROC) I would have said YES IN A HEARTBEAT without even thinking of it. I love her so much and material things do not replace the love I have for that woman. It's the same as asking if you would ever lend a bag to your mother.

To me that would make someone selfish. She gave birth to the man that spoils you, no matter what you think of her or how you feel about her the bottom line is she is your husbands mother. Thank her for giving you such a precious gift.

I know MIL's can be testy but it is up to you to learn to deal with them.

Baggs, I couldn't have said this any better:love:. Your MIL is sooo lucky to have a dil that loves her as much as she probably loves you.
 
Baggs,

You are definitely the voice of reason. If either my Mom or my MIL asked to borrow one of my bags, I would definitely let them. Why not let them enjoy the pleasure of carrying an H bag too? They would give me the world, if I asked...
 
I agree with Shakespeare:

From Shakespeare's Hamlet, 1603:

LORD POLONIUS:
Neither a borrower nor a lender be;
For loan oft loses both itself and friend,
And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.

(I think in this case, husbandry means: careful or thrifty management; frugality, thrift, or conservation and the management of domestic affairs or of resources generally.)
 
ITA, saligator, although I wouldn't mind sharing with my sister if it meant she'd share her lot with me- she's got more inventory! We're both pretty anal about our H bags, so it could theoretically work. Still, if something happened to that special little exotic she let me borrow, I couldn't live w/ the guilt...
 
I think I would worry too much if something would happen to a bag I loaned out. It would have to be to someone I really trusted to take care or it would have to be a bag that was virtually indestructible.

I loaned a bag to my mother several years ago for a family event and she never gave it back to me. When I last visited her and had to look in her closet for her, I saw it and I was so upset! It was a patent leather bag and the hot climate and lack of care had completely ruined it and I literally threw it in the garbage! That got me to wondering about all the bags I had given her for birthdays etc. and what shape they were in.
 
my MIL is about to go on a trip with us this wknd but will continue on to another trip to visit my SIL in cali without me and DH. not excited that she decided to go with us last minute, but doubly excited that she'll be gone for 20 days afterwards! muhahaha

anyways, i was cleaning out my closet (getting ready to move to our new house!) and had lined up all my handbags (minus H) on the couch, each resepectively in their sleeper. the next morning i woke up to find all my bags were out of the sleepers and kinda scattered all over the couch. of course, this royally p*ssed me off but what can i do? typical MIL stuff i have to deal with. so it turns out MIL was trying to figure out which bag to "borrow" during this 20 day trip of hers. thank goodness i didn't have my H bags out there, so she ended up picking a chanel bag.

so this got me thinking....would i have allowed her to borrow any of my H bags if she had asked or seen them on the couch as well?? how do you say no without hurting their feelings?? is this selfish of me??? would you share your H bags with anyone else?? would you trust anyone with your H?
I think I missed something. Um why is this something you have to deal with? Can't you just say no? I know I only have one or two people that can borrow my bags. That's it. And I don't fel bad about it. Other people will never really take care of your stuff the way you will.
 
Nuh - uh. Am I the only one here who knows the Power Of The Asian Mother-In-Law?

If my (ex) MIL wanted something of mine and I didn't give it to her, hubby would hear about it. My mother would hear about it. My aunts would hear about it. My cousins would hear about it. My next door neighbor would hear about it......I'm not sure if she wrote to the president about it, but she might as well have!

This is SO TRUE!!! Not just the relatives but especially the immediate ones. My DH's sisters are so catty and gossipy too when someone outside of the family does something. Ironic thing is, they do it too but it's ok but when someone is "married" into the family, not ok. :nono: They got that personality from none other than my MIL.