Rude Obnoxious Men. Crying. Please post.

DiscountDiva

Member
Oct 21, 2006
154
1
:crybaby::crybaby:Hubby started having problems with his laptop last night and had a lot of work to do. Hard drive was spinning and causing everything to move slow. He needs a new laptop anyway. I was up really late sort of keeping him company (I couldn't fall asleep with him in the other room typing anyway).
Today I am very tired. He still has his work to do. After work, we take the metro to the mac store to get a new laptop for him. He wants anti-glare screen, not glossy. We purchase and leave. didn't check the box. We get home, he opens the box and "*&$#%, this is glossy." I'm already in my D&G catsuit lounging out because it's so comfy. I don't want to put something different on, but I need to cover it up a bit. I have an old Victoria's secret keywhole pantsuit that I threw over it with a little black jacket, so my whole outfit is really stretchy and then the only boots I have that are high heel enough to deal with the length of th VS pants are my bronze stuart weitzman crushables, which are only really visible at a bit of the toe because the VS pants are so long. I throw on a dark green courdouroy hat. I feel a little dark, so I grab a red patent leather bag and throw a colorful bracelet on. We head out. I realize, crossing the street that my pants are still really too long. He says he'll go without me, it's okay. I say okay, and head back to the apartment hoping concierge is still sitting there. Here's where it gets awful.
A young, heavyset man says, wow, black really suits you, you look nice. I say thank you, but I don't make eye contact. I feel like it's rude and would probably embarass him with his friend there if I ignore him. I know I am in trouble when he says "wow, she actually responded to me." the other guy says, yeah... uh, she's married. And I just kind of look at them exasperated because I'm really tired and I was just trying to be polite. My concierge isn't there, so I wait in the airlock. I feel like I'm not in a good position, so I kind of hide in the airlock. The heavyset guy actually opens the door to the airlock. I say, dude, thank you, but you've really got to go (because I mean, he's following me!) and he tells me he has a place here and keeps talking (and he's scaring me). And I say I was just trying to be polite and he repeats my statement and then tells me I look like a crackhead anyway. I just said, you're a really weird person as he finally left. I was terrified for the next five minutes waiting for the concierge to come back and started crying to him when he asked me what was wrong (hubby and I know concierge pretty well). I think I am crying because he scared me. Why do people have to be so awful to people who are just trying to be nice?
 
Defense mechanism. He seemed shocked that you even responded to him and then when you did he was getting too friendly. As soon as you said you were only being nice then he probably took huge offense to that.

Some men just don't know how to act and henceforth probably why the guy was surprised you spoke to him. Just how people are, which sucks, but I would have been scared too.
 
Because he's probably a ADHD, Bi-Polar, Narcisistic Personality Diordered psycho like my ex, who I still have nightmares about!! CREEP-EE!!!
There's a ton of messed up people in this world and many who live in dilusion. Trust me I had my fill of one for all I could stand which was about a year and a half. And when I say I still have nighmares, I'm not kidding!!!!
Your best bet is to ignore those types of people because they just don't think rationally. My ex is such a bizarre freak a zoid that he would send gifts to my work, send money and gift cards in the mail, beg my friends to talk me into taking him back WEIRD STUFF that never ended until I sent a certified letter threatening legal action as I was advised by legal council..... but the kicker was that all the while he lived with some other chick who he now brags to our mutual friends that he's boffing another girl on the side!
Trust me,I have made a very strong effort to NEVER, EVER regret anything I've done and always walk away thankful for the lessons that I've learned from what I thought was the right thing to do at the time. But he is the one thing in my life I regret, the one thing I wish I could do over and the one thing I would take away if I could!

People are F**KED UP!
 
You'll feel better after a couple of days, it usually takes me that long to stop feeling like crud after someone's upset me like that. :sad: it's just one of those things that happens occasionally, a stranger harrasses you on the street for no reason then kicks off when you don't act like you actually are there for their entertainment. You didn't ask for it to happen, it was all unprovoked. You probably just looked really nice and the guy thought he'd try his luck. :s
 
I'm sorry this happened to you, it's really upsetting and scary, I know. :sad:

He obviously fancied you, thought he had a chance because you were polite enough to respond and then felt so rejected, when you told him you were just being polite, that he tried to get his own back by insulting you.

I think most women go through this from time to time; often, on numerous occasions.

The worst time this happened to me was when I was out with friends and a guy I'd never seen before approached me in a pub and told me it was his birthday and could he have a birthday kiss, I smiled and said 'Happy Birthday!', but politely refused the kiss and tried to carry on walking back to our table.

The guy got in front of me, blocking my path and kept on pestering me for this kiss.

I eventually said 'No, sorry.', in a slightly firmer tone of voice and he tipped his, full, pint of lager over my head!!! :shocked:
 
I'm sorry you had to go through that. We all have, at one time or another, and it sucks.

I was lucky, I learned at a young age the trick of assuming such an unapproachable and imperious air that I can even accompany a cordial "thank you" with an eye contact that leaves no doubt in the gentleman's mind that I am a lady, he is a gentleman, and the interview is over.

You can do it, too. Practice in the mirror, even with a friend, although she will laugh and laugh until you get it right, and then she will tremble.
 
With a lot of guys, you have to have a slightly *****y air because some guys will read that as to mean 'please make out / have sex with me!'


I remember once, on Kwajalein, I was riding my bike home from the movies one night. I was about 12 at the time. I rode past a guy who had fallen off his bike. I stopped to see if he was okay. (At the time, I noticed he smelled like beer. Later on, I came to realize he was drunk.)

We got to talking, and at some point, he said, "Can I have kiss now?" and I think he even touched my ass. I broke away and screamed "No!" and rode home as fast as I could.

I remember being so scared at the time.
 
I'm sorry about the jerk. Do not take it personally because you did not invite his attention. I think some men simply do not understand how awful they are capable of making women feel. I remember one afternoon walking home from our downtown area and unfortunately having to pass by a few local bars where men are always hanging out smoking and very drunk. A few sort of hollered at me and one said, "Nice t-ts! You could lose the shoes though!"
I was so angry and just kept walking. But, the more I thought about it the angrier I got. How dare he comment on my body...but my shoes? Some men just suck.
 
what a rude immature loser!!! i had a guy that acted just like that and i told him you follow me anymore im calling the police.

you should be very flattered however that you attact so much attention, even if it is negative, it means you are very attractive.
 
With a lot of guys, you have to have a slightly *****y air because some guys will read that as to mean 'please make out / have sex with me!'

Cannot agree more. Unfortunately most girls find this out the same way you did. Once you answer they seem to think they've been given the all clear and procede to chat you up. Once I was walking home late and looked back as there was someone walking behind me. The guy saw and reassured me that he was a 'good guy', then went on to walk beside me chatting about random things. He then asked me if I was married then got angry when I wouldn't give him my number. I had to take his number just to get him to leave :yucky:

I was talkin to a coworker about this topic and both she and I came to the conclusion that we're too nice for our own good. Our job requires good customer service and sometimes guys take our friendly behaviour to mean we like them :rolleyes:

You sound like you're too polite and nice. Advice I was given was that sometimes you had to be mean. Maintain politeness but don't be friendly. Now to you it may seem mean and rude but to guys it won't (they're used to it). Other women act cold and aloof to strangers and guys take that behaviour as standard. It means "not interested".

Oops, I just reread your post and noticed you said you didn't make eye contact. (Ignore my previous advice. I'll keep it unedited though because it's still good advice for chronically nice girls.)

Obviously he was a sad man who cannot get a girl. The fact that you didn't even make eye contact or smile should have told him to backoff. It doesn't mean you have to be rude in the future to all guys. He was just a once off weirdo. Unfortunately, many girls do adopt the *****y air and when you said thank you he wasn't expecting it. *hugs* to you girl, men just don't get it sometimes.

I think ShimmaPuff needs to make a video recording of her amazing reply so all us girls can learn it!
 
my best advice is to not respond and be as arrogant as you can when it comes to a man who comments on your outfit while you go back to your apartment.

this already tells you that he isn't a gentleman or anything bec you are a lady alone and he is there with his friend. if he had any sense he would know that you 'd get scared...

sorry you had to go through this kind of trouble.
 
So sorry you had to go through that! Can you report them? Why was your concierge gone for so long? This shouldn't have happened! And the weird guy has a place there? What a creep! Take good care and I hope you file some report to your building manager. *hugs*