quoted in the Times magazine

  1. Jessica Simpson is quoted in the Times magazine (whatever the hell that is) saying that her ex husband Nick Lachey … ummm … lets see … how to sugarcoat this … has virtually no penis. Yeah, turns out there’s no way to sugarcoat that.. Jessica says:
    "Nick didn't pack too well if you know what I mean, but I got over it."
    And two days ago, she is quoted as saying:
    "Nick's small package

    "Nick's small package was a problem sometimes, like the first time we had sex, to tell you the truth, I didn't really feel much, I faked the whole thing, I really felt sorry for him, I still loved him though."

    When asked about this, a top mental health doctor said, "Nick should probably kill himself. We rarely recommend that, but, seriously, she said she couldn't feel anything." This is also another reason I desperately want to sleep with Jessica Simpson. I'd be following an infant.

    She'll think I'm huge, almost no matter what. Whereas if I was about to have sex with Paris Hilton, I would tie a rope around my waist . Have someone on the other end, work out some kind of code. Two pulls on the rope means I'm in danger, one means I need more air, that sort of thing. And when I yell "on belay" he needs to tighten up.
     
  2. Wow jessica you really are bitter that Nick has moved on. Personally i think its the smartest thing he's done.:yahoo:

    I hope she's happy because KARMA is going to BITE her hard.. :roflmfao:
     
  3. aww how embarasssing :push:
     
  4. Ouch!
     
  5. He needed a little one to fit into her tight . . . okay, you know what? I'm not going to finish that sentence. You all know what I'm trying to say. (I HOPE)
     
  6. :roflmfao: :roflmfao: :roflmfao:
     
  7. If he wants to say this is not true, he could always pose and we would all know the truth.
     
  8. That's so wrong for her to say that in an interview. :yucky:
     
  9. I hope Playgirl calls him up soon. :graucho::graucho::graucho:
     
  10. That's harsh..no matter how jealous or upset she might be that personal stuff needs to be kept to yourself.
     
  11. If that's true. . . what a B*tch!!!!!!!!!!

    She was a virgin!! Who teh hell is she comparing him too when she syas some of those thigns!
    That's seriously LOW and so degrading. . .
    as if it could be, my opinion is even lower of her now.

    She must be grasping at straws before her celebrity drowns.
     
  12. Nick...if you're reading this...

    If it's true, you can still come to MEEEE!!! I'LL GIVE YOU ALL THE LOVING YOU NEED!!!! :heart:3333
     
  13. WOW, what a BITTER *****?!?! its so underhanded to attack someone in this manner.....shows she has absolutely no class. i dont think wut she said is true, and i dont think nick needs to respond neither. he shouldnt even waste his time to entertain such stupidity.
     
  14. Wow I cannot believe she seriously came out and said that! :wtf: Poor Nick..... that would be a deal braker for me too...:yes: She sounds like an advertisement for pre-marital sex.... :roflmfao:
     
  15. LOL wow!!! That's some bitterness right there isn't it?! Oh well, she's saying that to be hurtful, I'm sure it worked, and I'm also sure there is no truth to it. Just extreme pettyness.