10 years down the line & I am still stuck, would love to hear from others
I think that is a bit longer than what is to be expected. What gives?
WOW!! Any additional details? We are here to HELP!!!
I had two bad break ups and it sucks. But the most helpful thing for me was to try to get into the head of the other person and understand their perspective. It is hard to move on sometimes and my heart goes out to you.
Yes I agree it is too long but I cannot get over it & have no interest in meeting anyone. I suppose it's the way I was brought up marriage is for life n all that LOL
he is with another woman with 6 kids now I am just so angry all the time he appears to treat them so well & treated us so bad, beat my kids etc I think that is why I cannot move on still so angry
Hi Christine, Thanks & Sorry you have gone through this twice. You would never get inside the head of this guy he is so twisted I never knew him
P.S. My handbags keep me sane
Oh Roz. I got tears in my eyes just reading your post.
You just have to learn to open your heart again. I can't imagine what you have been through, but if you can open your heart and mind again, good things will come. Easier said than done, I know, but an open and willing heart should attract another...
I know my cliche words are probably not much help, but I am thinking of you!
"Yes I agree it is too long but I cannot get over it & have no interest in meeting anyone. I suppose it's the way I was brought up marriage is for life n all that LOL
he is with another woman with 6 kids now I am just so angry all the time he appears to treat them so well & treated us so bad, beat my kids etc I think that is why I cannot move on still so angry"
One more thing to add regarding the post above:
I totally understand about marrying once for life, as I was raised with a Mom that had strong religious convictions regarding that subject. But don't you think that vows like that become null and void when there is violence involved? I couldn't imagine higher power )whichever higher power you believe in) that would want any of his children being treated like that. You deserve a second chance. Let yourself have one!
Again, easier said than done.
He is living his life with his new family and you suffered when you were with him, and now without him? You deserve some happiness too.
Sometimes I sit and think "What if I had done this and this differently" and think about how our future would have been together. Sometimes I do miss his smell, his kisses, his hugs, and the way he made love to me. I am completely, 100000% happy with the man I am with now - but I was with my ex for so long it's hard to accept that our relationship ended as abruptly as it did. We still remain friends and talk every once in a while...and I do have to admit, I miss him.
I am with someone else now, and I really love him....but my ex-husband did things for me that I know no one else in the world will ever understand me well enough to do. Simple things....look into my eyes and know that I need a kiss at that moment, read my mood, rub my feet in accordance to what shoes I wore that day without even asking.....sweet stuff.
You have to know that if this ex of yours was abusive to you & your kids, he probably is abusive to his new family....things are not always as they may appear. I think once youe meet that special someone it will happen....but you are going to have to open your heart to the possibility. Good luck.
BagAngel, protect yourself and your children. That's the best thing you can do. Surround yourself with positive people and come up with positive things to do with your children. As bad as you feel, your kids may be having trouble getting over what happened, also.
You're in a very powerful position right now: you have the power to put your new family (meaning yourself and your kids) on a positive course of action. You can show your kids what a happy family is by starting to do happy things with them. Cook together on certain nights of the week, have fun "movie nights" at home, do something nice for them and their friends...Make home life happy for them. Give them something pleasant to look back on. (The payoff is HUGE for you.) I speak from the child's perspective because my parents broke up for similar reasons. After the divorce, it was just mom and me...and somehow, she made home so pleasant. Interesting things start happening when you put all of your energy into making others you love happy: you start feeling better, you realize who really matters and loves you, you love yourself more, and other people (many are often men) notice and want be a part of it.
Ah thanks Siri, but I don't think I could ever trust another man. true that the vibes you give out attract I would say mine are stand clear LOL I never go out anyway thats why it is so great to have found new friends here
Glad that you have found someone that you are happy with, good that you can still talk to ex we haven't spoken in years, very acrimonious break up.
Glad that you found someone. I really don't miss anything about my ex only "being married" he was a cold & cruel man.
the thing that hurts is that he is not abusive in any way to them & they describe him as loving, caring & kind. This blows my mind as they say Leoparsd don't change their spots but he obviously has! So even though he did all the bad things I am left feeling it was my inadequacy.