imposing members

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. i realise that this is probably totally against the rules and will get closed or deleted within minutes but i have to say- after the drama of the get it off your chest thread in the LV forum it seems tht more and more members are becoming judgemental and trying to force ideas onto others. im pleased the thread was closed because it was not developing in a healthy way, certain members seem to think they can tell others how they should behave. as far as i could tell the "negativity" in the subforum was just people expressing their true feelings. is this wrong?

    as the thread went on it felt like some of the more established members were trying to preach to others and that made me feel very uncomfortable. i loved the forum for its individuality and the fact that you could get honest answers about anything, this seems to be wanning and the rules are getting more strict.
  2. You know, I somewhat agree with you. I hate to say this, but honestly, from when I first joined to now, things have changed on this forum, and I don't know if it's for the good. While the majority of the members are great people and some very sweet individuals and I have met some truly awesome people here, I sometimes come across members who are constantly throwing around personal attacks, being rude, etc. And not only one time, but it is repetitive, and what I wonder is why something isn't done about it. I have found myself being hurt by some comments, and I know others have, too. If someone goes against the rules, then why isn't something done about it? Honestly, I know the mods and admins are busy at times, but it seems when a PM is sent about a problem or another instance, the situation isn't handled like other very similar ones, or sometimes a general PM is never answered at all(don't understand this.) I cannot tell you how many times recently I have began to type a reply to a thread, but then deleted it in fear that someone is going to critcize it or attack it in a hostile way, it just brings you down when some members do this. Because of this, I have been hesistant in posting, and instead I have been mostly just reading and browsing threads rather than posting my comments. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE this forum and I learn so much here on the latest in handbags, but it just seems that a few bad apples can spoil the bunch, kwim? And I agree how in that mentioned LV thread, how there is a difference in expressing your thoughts in a polite way and a rude way, now what I don't understand is that was brought to attention and thought about, but, imo, far ruder things have been occuring. I really hope no one takes this post the wrong way, I just know that feedback is always welcome, and I am just expressing my concerns and thoughts on this issue. I don't mean to be problematic or anything like this with this post. This is just something that has been bothering me. Maybe it's just a misunderstanding on my part.
    Thanks for listening.
  3. I only read the first three pages of Twiggers's thread and then lost interest in it. I did not know it caused drama and was deleted, but I could have seen that coming.

    Anyway, I know what you, op, mean. However, if any poster here thinks that his or her opinion matters more, because they own more LV than others, or because they have been tPF members for a longer time, than I have to say they are pathetic individuals with too much free time on their hands. This is just an internet board devoted to handbags and fashion, nothing we write about (except maybe the relationship forum) here is really of any importance for our real lives. Personally, I also do not care if I belong to the in-crowd of any forum, because I am an adult and have a fulfilling real life as well, this board is just tangential to my life. The gist of this paragraph is: tPF is not real life, LV is not the most important thing in life, but if a person thinks they are, well, then they have a problem.

    Regarding posting dissenting or critical opinions and facts about LV, I have no problems with that. In fact, I did so in the past and will continue to do so. I will voice my opinions/concerns/whatever (in a polite manner of course) and if someone else does not agree with me, they are more than welcome to post their opinion; for I appreciate an intelligent and polite discussion very much. However, if a poster chooses to attack me, I not only get a good laugh from that, but I think that such foolish behaviour sheds a worse light on the other poster than on me. The same applies to any attempt of forcing their opinion onto me.
  4. I understand what you are saying. Some of the comments lately have been hurtful. I can not say this enough. If it is something that is truly innappropriate PLEASE report it. If its a rude comment that you feel you can handle on your own, than address it in a mature way and if it gets out of hand, report it. We do our best as mods to help keep the forum a friendly, smooth running place. We do not catch everything all the time, but we try! The forum is huge and reporting is the best way to get to us. Some of the mods get so many pm's per day that it is hard for some them to answer right away. I think if we all respect each others thoughts and ideas and think about what we type before we type it...Lv will work itself out. There is alot of picking and very defensive ideas flying around at the moment. It will calm down again. (if we all pull together).
  5. Just come over and visit the family and relationships forum, LOL!! What I was trying to get at was that most posts/posters in that forum discuss quite emotional and sometimes controversial topics, arguments and debates get heated sometimes but people who discuss there almost always state their (very individual) opinions really well. It's a prime example of a place where many people with extremely different opinions and thoughts on how to handle things interact and exchange ideas quite well.

    ...and maybe hanging around in there for a while will teach people some good lessons on how to behave on a message board!!
  6. That is so true Merika...thats why I love the relationship forum. Debates can be had without name calling or attacking. Also true problems are talked about with LOTS of different ways of thinking just flowing. I love that.
  7. its not that people are getting mean that agravates me. its the more established members who are not mods who think they can tell us how to bahave and how to reply to posts.
    just like purple kitty i have been posting less and less because it seems that if you dont agree with the majority you get shot down. and one member in particular makes me feel very patronised.
    we are all adult enough to understand if someone doesnt like a bag so why is it such bad thing to voice our honest opinions in the LV forum right now.
  8. Then you can respectfully disagree with the person who appears to patronize you. Each and every person has their own guidelines as to what is acceptable behavior and what is not. I personally go by the criteria that I'm not posting as an anonymous poster, but talking to a person face-to-face. If I cannot say what I post to the poster if I'm talking face to face with them, then I don't say it. There will always be people who sound preachy (like me!!), but whether you listen to them or not is entirely your own choice!

    This is an example where some people had differing opinions about threads in GD forum (before relationship forum was set up). Everybody had their opinions about negative posts, positive posts (happy vs sad posts) etc:
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.