I'm Scared - My Husband Was Just Diagnosed With Diabetes

  1. Hi everyone. Like some wives, I've always bugged hubby to eat better, exercise and whatnot without sounding like a nag. After all, my life would be empty without him - we're a very tight family with four great kids. Anyway, he really needs to lose about 30 pounds....has a fatty liver which he's getting biopsed next week and is on cholesterol meds. His cholesterol is pretty good right now, but I was shocked at how low his HDLs are.

    I'm not the perfect person - I could stand to lose 30 pounds myself, but I'm reeeally into eating well. Genetically I make a ton of cholesterol, and recently went on meds myself (Vytorin) as well as a serious effort to take my 2TBs of flaxseed meal a day. Well, my cholesterol dropped from 267 to 193 almost overnight and my trigylcerides went from 227 to 168. Anyway, I'm all about salmon, wheats, healthy foods - I love it all. I don't have much of a sweet tooth - just a carb fettish.

    Anyway, my hubby who's 47 (I'm 41) just found out that his diabetic test read 8.2 when technically someone who doesn't have diabetes it should be between like 4 and 5. I'm completely new at this and being that I'm a worrywart from the get-go, I am so afraid of failing organs and horrible problems that diabetes can trigger. I hope that this will scare him into being a more healthy person - he's really a positive person, always seems to have the good side of life on his side...I told him he HAS to call the doctor TODAY to discuss the results. He's very depressed because he said that he'll never enjoy another meal again and he's just going to be hungry and miserable for the rest of his life. "Thanks a lot" I thought to myself - and "don't be so effing selfish - we need you..." but I understand it's a lot to digest (pardon the pun).....he has to stop dumping 15 gallons of salad dressing on his salads, he needs to stop eating so many carbs...I KNOW THE DRILL - I try to get him to change it - but I know that ULTIMATELY, it's HIS decision....

    When I'm upset or worried about anything, I TALK. He MULLS. So talking to him about this just makes him really cranky and upset. I know he needs his space to think about it all, but I feel like I'm going insane. I was up most of the night on the computer, sleeping on the couch - making sure we got up early so we could be together before he went to work. He was more upset about my being up all night than his diagnosis.

    Does anyone here have diabetes? Or know someone with diabetes? Positive thoughts? Any suggestions? Is it a death sentence?
  2. it is not a death sentence. You just have to take care of your body right. My mom and my dad (RIP) has diabetes.

    My mother's doctor gave her a diet to follow on. not to much carbs (rice, noodless) it all really depends on what type of diabetes as well.

    you and your husband should do research and eat according to that. does he like veggies? no? well why not make homemade soup with veggies.
  3. I'm so sorry... I know how scary it must be for you. I have a couple of Aunts that are Type II Diabetics, and I had gestational diabetes. The diet isn't too bad at all! You basically eat what you should have been eating all along.

    Since I was pregnant when I had it, it almost was too much food for me. You balance a healthy portion of protein with lots of leafy, colorful vegetables. I was hypoglycemic (low blood sugar) not the normal high blood sugar form of diabetes so they wanted me to eat lots of fruit and more carbs that I normally would.

    Use this time to look up diet plans and recipes. I'm sure you'll be able to find some really yummy stuff online. Your DH will stop feeling so depressed once he finds out how little his diet will have to change after all.

    (Does he eat a lot of sugar or junk food? That's pretty much the only thing that has to go.)
  4. I know alot about diabetes, but I could really make you fall asleep.

    My advice is to do alot of reading about it. The more you read...the more you will learn. You will also retain important information that will help. Maybe you can try reading online a bit or pick up the book Diabetes for Dummies. There is a great deal of information out there.

    Initially, there is alot of changes that have to be made. You can't compare yourself to others. One body works different than another. You have to learn how much you can eat, what you can eat, when you can eat and how it will change your numbers. Once you figure that all out things fall in to line a bit more.

    Life does not end, but you do want to take it seriously. You don't want to get to the point that you have serious trouble with your organs. It is not a death sentence. This is a wake-up call to make changes and to take care of yourself. Actually, this is a good thing. The longer you go without knowing that you have diabetes the worse things can be for you.

    Look at it positively and tackle the issue that way. I wish your husband strength to work through this and I also hope it helps you moving forward. Maybe you will both make lifestyle changes that will help your overall health.

    All the best!
  5. Cheer up!! Diabetes is not the end. Several people on my mom's side have it, and they've led perfectly normal lives. All your husband needs to do is realize the problems this might bring later on if he doesn't start making the necessary adjustments in his life. Maybe go over this together?

    Some people need to be a little scared in order to change. I know I do! I would've never started losing weight if I wasn't threatened with surgery unless I did.
  6. I'm guessing you mean his A1c is 8.2. That's not too bad at all. Mine was over 14....
    Supposed to be under 7, or so my doctor told me.

    Take a deep breath, and repeat after me - "There are worse things that can happen. This is treatable."

    More than likely, he'll be on oral meds, and have to watch his sugar/carb intake.
    Adding in some execise will help a lot.

    Do you know what his fasting blood sugar was? That's supposed to be between 80 and 120. Ummm, mine was 288. I've seen mine as high as 400 when I first found out I was diabetic.

    Sounds like his isn't that bad - he's lucky. There are a lot of good books out there.
    I think I read like 5 when I first found out I was diabetic.

    Yeah - it kind of sucks. But you have to deal with it. It's not a death sentence. But you have to manage it, or things later in life will really be bad.

    PM me if you want to talk. I was doing really well for a while, then had a herniated disc, and back surgery. A month or so of living on pain pills, plus having a doctor I hated, made me go "off the wagon", and ignore my diabetes for about 2 years. I'm working on getting my blood sugar under control again. Slowly getting there ;).
  7. Hi there--I have diabetes type I and A1C should be under 7 for a diabetic. I had a very scary experience a few months back (you could probably search my posts).

    If you want to pm me to talk- please do, I will be more than happy to help and answer any questions you have
  8. My mom's is at a 7 so maybe that's why she doesn't take it so seriously. She's on oral meds for now. I say that only because she hasn't changed her eating habits at all, she doesn't care whatsoever. She eats cake, chocolate, and ice cream all the time. My grandmother gets so upset with her and they have constant arguments but my mom says it's "her life":rolleyes:
  9. My step dad is that way too....but he's 77, and a high blood sugar reading for him is 160. His medication seems to be working, and keeps his blood sugar in a normal range most of the time. Dad says the same thing.

    Breads, rice, pasta, seem to effect me more than candy does. Granted, I don't eat a lot of candy - never did. Or let me eat pizza - lol! That's what put me up to 400 blood sugar before.
  10. MY DH is 60 & he alternates between having it & not. Depending on what he's eaten.
    A change in diet, especially at your DH young age might help out alot.
  11. With his current levels, it is quite possible that if he loses some weight, exercises and improves his diet he could control his diabetes with no meds at all.

    My dad had type II diabetes and never took it seriously. In cases like his, it CAN cause life threatening complications. But you cannot expect your health to improve when you have diabetes severe enough to require insulin injections and still hide candy bars in the workshop!

    So I've researched this a lot, given that it runs in my family and had a big hand in my dad's death. It IS controllable and you really do not have to give up on having a very satisfying diet. You are all lucky that it was caught early and once he gets over the shock of the diagnosis, it is likely he will realize that he can adjust his life and make this negative into a positive.
  12. Like everyone has said just do some research on it. My father has had diabetes for over 30 years now adn still healthy. Diabetes is life changing and it is scary, but I think I don't think yous hould panic. I feel like diabetes in a way saved my father's life, he would have been eating unhealthy and drinking soda all the time. He eats really healthy now and goes out to jog 2x a day EVERYDAY, never misses and takes his insulin shots. He looks like hes 50 when hes 67. He is still healthy and does everything he needs to do.

    As long as you eat the right things and exercise and take care of your body.. he can totally take the diagnosis and turn it into something good. I wish the best for your family and your husband. I think the fact that you are posting this and reading what everyone has to say is providing great support for your husband.
  13. I'm sorry about the news :sad:

    I am sure your husband is shocked too, whether he expected the result or not.
    I don't have any advice...
    A few of my relatives have diabetes, they don't follow any of the doctor's recommendations aside from meds, and it really pains me and makes me feel so helpless because I know that with proper care, diabetes is a manageable condition.

    Best of luck to you and your family.
  14. Like Kellybag, I too know a lot about this disease and could bore you to death but I wont, Ill try to stick to a few key points.

    An A1c of 8 is obviously not great but it could be so much worse. You dont know how many horror stories I hear of people being in the high teens. The key is to NOT let it get there and to make those lifestyle changes NOW. Obviously the higher he goes, the harder it may be to get the numbers down later.

    Excercise and diet are key, a working muscle is the only time our body uses glucose without the need for insulin so its an awesome way to help lower blood sugars, losing weight will also really help lower his insulin resistance. However, dont be afraid of pills. So many people are afraid of them, dont wont to resort to them etc etc but if it can help lower your blood sugars IN COMBINATION with diet and excercise then you're only improving your chances of avoiding complications associated with diabetes. Pills are not a crutch, they are a compliment to the lifestyle changes your husband must make. (although if your doctor prescribes a secretagogue like Glyburide or Gluconorm etc. I wouldnt take it, they just force more insulin out of the pancreas, which leads to beta cell deterioration and eventually tires the pancreas out so it, also hypoglycemia is a common side effect. There are better meds out there that dont do this)

    At the end of the day. Type II Diabetes is TREATABLE. It kills me when I see people ignore their disease "oh, whats a little high blood sugar". If you're doctor told you you had Cancer you wouldnt sit back and do nothing so why do people do it with Diabetes? Im not speaking about you though when I say that, it sounds to me though like you are on top of things and recognize that your husband needs to make some lifestyle changes. The best you can do is be supportive, maybe make those changes with him, join a gym together, eat the same foods etc. Get a glucometer, continue to test his sugars at home so there are no surprises when you go to the doctor and again, if your doctor prescribes him something, dont be afraid, its going to help him in the long run to keep his blood sugars down. Diabetes is progressive, making these changes will help slow down that progression and prevent the complications you are worried about.

    I could go on even more but I wont. Feel free to PM me if you have any questions.
  15. Well, we're supposed to meet with the doctor next week. I read up a lot on stuff and know now about how 15 grams of carbs is 1 carb choice. But how many carb choices are you allowed per day - or does it depend on the weight of the person?
    Tonight we had a good healthy dinner - and I went out and bought whole grain items for him. I'm really into cooking, so it's sort of like an adventure for me - and frankly, after reading so many recipes for diabetics, it really just is a very healthy way of living...half your plate should be veggies, 1/4 should be a starch, 1/4 should be a protein.
    I'm just so overwhelmed with how I feel so responsible for his health now. Like I'd better get real educated real quick. He's working so hard - it's a lot for me to expect him to now get completely knowledgeable overnight....:s