i feel bad for my friend [long post]

  1. My friend came from Las Vegas a week ago. In her last week, she and her mum went to LV [I'm just not sure what store]. But anyway, when they went inside, she saw the Mélusine [sp?] shoes in pink. And since before she always told me how she's head over heels with LV. So she asked her mum if she could have a pair. Her mum said she can't because she was afraid she might only use it once. Fast-forward, her mum went to Gucci. And since my friend had money anyway, she thought, why not buy it? And she did. When her Mum went back to see her, she was shocked to see her toting the brown paper bag. So she asked what was inside and she said the shoes were. Her mum got so mad she shouted at her IN THE MALL ranting why she bought the shoes when she said she shouldn't. She got so mad she returned it quickly while my friend ran away back to the hotel crying. When her mum came back she went like "You don't follow my rules anymore! You are such a stubborn @#%&$!" and then my she answered back, "Don't give me all your menopausal rants because I don't give a &#@%!" and her mum slapped her. My friend was crying to me over the phone and told me everything. I just feel so sorry for her. And I just had to share it to you guys.

    Any thoughts?
     
  2. Frist of all I am sorry for your friend that she had to deal with this. It sure would be nice to have no problems with your parents, especially ones that go to this level

    I have gone through huge things with my mom too. It has gone so far as getting slapped. Now though, my mom is my best friend and all that is in the "teenage past."

    Just be there for your friend. She is going to be mad, and so is her mother. They will eventually get through it. Nobody said growing up was easy!

    What your friend said was terrible but I understand how you can get heated. Her mother also shouldn't have made her return the shoes if it was her money. Ppl have to make their own mistakes. Especially when it comes to money. In the end though..if her mother told her no and she did it anyway...that is a problem and you have to see where her mother is mad. Still, no excuse for saying what your friend said. You just should NOT disrespect your parents like that!

    We can't judge them though because we aren't them. Like I said before, just be there for your friend to vent to. That is all that YOU can do!

    :flowers:
     
  3. Wow. It sounds like your friends' mom needs to give her some space. How old is she [your friend], if you don't mind me asking?
     
  4. ethan's mommy,
    true. people really have to make mistakes. we're not created perfect after all. i told her the same thing, she shouldn't have said that because first of all, it's her mum! but i can see that was a really hard situation for her, and her mum for that matter.

    john 5,
    she's 17 :smile:
     
  5. Well, a) she disobeyed her mother, b) she opposed her mother's authority and c) she was impertinent. Her mother's reaction was warranted.
     
  6. i don't think your friend deserved to be slapped. but i always felt that as long as i was living under my parents roof, i had to follow their rules.

    your friend probably should have tried to discuss it further, since it was her own money. sorry it had to happen that way.
     
  7. Wow, is that your friend's own money? If it is, she probably could have bought it but needed to explain this without buying that behind her mom's back and yelling profanities at her mom.

    If it isn't her money, then she definitely shouldn't have bought. You should probably reassure that we may do silly things when we see such gorgeous products, but after it's out of sight we can calm down and realize what we could have done differently to avoid the confrontation.
     
  8. Sorry to hear that :sad: Hope your friend feel better soon :sad: :heart:
     
  9. ITA. A little more communication can go a long way.
    I get along great with my parents and it's because we talk about things and believe me, my mom especially has talked me out of buying certain things she doesn't think I'll use and interestingly enough, she has been right.
    I also think your friend bought the shoes just to show her mom that she could. Not really the smartest move IMO as it seemed to escalate the problem.
     
  10. I think that its wrong for the mom to slap her daughter and speak to her in such a nasty manner..all over some stupid purchase....I think that she could of handled it much, much better....and the yelling in the mall is over the top....

    The daughter was out of line with her comments too, but it feels like the mom was taking things out of context...could of been a simple thing to fix.....
     
  11. i will tell her about this. she will be so grateful for all your comments :smile:

    anyway, it was her own money. also, when her mum came back she never gave her back her money.
     
  12. I agree with many of the posts. The mother was wrong to hit her daughter, but the daughter should have respected/obeyed her mother no matter how strongly the daughter disagreed.
     
  13. I think the mother could have dealt with that better, her daughter will remember that for a long time.
     
  14. Rule #1_ never call your menopausal mother menopausal...it only brings out the true menopause...
     
  15. I feel really bad for your friend and her mother. I have a 25 year old daughter and remember one of those episodes where she (at age 12) wanted something I didn't feel she should have and told her 'no'. She informed me that she would simply go and ask her grandparents to buy it for her, since she knew that they would. She claimed that all the other kids had this item and that their parents let them. I sternly but calmly explained that I didn't care if every parent on the face of the earth bought one for their child, and that I would destroy the item if her grandparents did buy it for her. Boy, was she angry! To this day, we laugh about this incident, and she thanks me for setting boundaries, beyond those that money can afford. I pray that your friend and her mother will develop a healthier relationship.:tender: