How do you know?

  1. My heart is breaking right now. My Mathilda is going into a decline and I am afraid that The Ultimate Decision is just around the corner. She does not appear to be suffering acutely but then again she is obviously not the kitty she used to be. Am I being selfish when I say that? How do I know she's not suffering? Just because she isn't crying out in pain? just because she purrs when I stroke her? If she isn't suffering, should I just let nature take its course and let her die peacefully at home? I'm so afraid of doing the wrong thing----having her put to sleep "too soon" or waiting "too long". I have read someone's post that said "better one day too soon than one day too late" and I agree 100% with that---until it's my own baby. How do you know?

    I am taking her to the vet today...maybe they will have some advice for me. This is truly agonizing. To all of you who have lost pets recently, please accept my utmost heartfelt condolences and I am sorry if I did not respond to your individual threads, I have just been trying to avoid thinking about this to be honest but I can't anymore. This is so hard.....
     
  2. ^^^ I feel u. My dog is very sick now. His got a tumor near his nose.. Now his head is like twice wat it was. I do not wanna "give him the jab" but im afraid he might have difficulty breathing 1 night and suffer tremendously before he dies.. Tough!!
     
  3. Chpwhy, I hope when the time comes you can be at peace with your decision no matter what it is. That's what's so hard---trying to do what's best for your pet instead of being selfish and wanting to keep him/her around just a little bit longer. Like, I'm so afraid that I'll keep Mathilda home to "die in peace" and she'll suddenly go into resoiratory distress in the middle of the night. The nearest emergency vet hospital is easily 45 minutes away from my house. I would just hate for her to die in the car on the way to the vet, KWIM?

    I had a cat when I was very young (20's) who got feline leukemia. He started decompensating and we finally took him to the vet's where he got some steroids and some fluids and they basically sent us home and told us to come back if he got worse. Well, he got worse and finally I said, I can't take this anymore, let's go back but he died in my arms on the way. I will never forget that.
     
  4. Oh, madamefifi... It is NEVER an easy thing to go through when you have to think about saying good-bye... I went through saying good-bye to my cat Rocky almost 3 years ago and it was the hardest decision ever. He passed away with end-stage kidney disease. With him, I decided that saying good bye at home was the best thing for all of us. I agree, I think taking a cat to the vet can be such a tramatic event in itself... Does your vet have such service or can refer to another vet who can grant your wish to say good-bye at home?
    Some of us may need the encoragement from others to say 'This may be time time'... And some of us can't handle having we be the last person their cat sees...so they say good-bye in all kinds of ways.
    I always feel to those who have such special bonds with their cat(s), they will let you know when. So, I strongly believe whatever decision you make is the right one for Mathilda and you. Your vet can advice you what a she may be going through depending on the illness she has... (I am sorry, I don't remember what specifically Mathilda is going through...)
    I am just so sorry you are having to go through this process right now... My thoughts are with you and Mathilda...
     
  5. We just went through that with our beloved cat Nimbus this past year. He started to get thin and his usual picky eating became HUGELY not eating. We took him to the vet and they ran tests and did xrays and he was in last stages of kidney disease - they were GONE and his toxin levels were OUTRAGEOUSLY high. She said that he had a week to a month.

    We brought him home. It was 3 weeks before christmas. We put of the Christmas tree and he started drinking the tree water like usual (he had stopped drinking) and he perked up. We didn't want to make a decision or have a death over the holidays because our 10 year old at the time was SOOO distraught. So, we took their suggestion of subcutaneous fluids to make him feel more comfortable. We did it ourselves at home every day.

    It made a huge difference, and while he initially started eating again, that eventually stopped too. He still followed us from room to room and purred and even played a bit, but he was wasting away.

    This cat was a HUGE cat. Most of his life he was about 18-20 lbs. When we started the SC fluids he weighed 13 lbs. We weighed him in May and he was down to 10 something - he was emaciated - completely.

    But he just didn't seem to know he was dying - he groomed daily, purred, etc. but there was NOTHING left... he was sleeping more and so on. Finally, I said, when this bag of fluids is gone, I think we need to say goodbye. For those next few days I think I waffled on that decision at least a 100 times. Was he ready? He still seemed to want to live. Did we already wait too long? But... we all agreed - even the 10 year old- it was time.

    We made the appt. (this was June) and we just spent the day loving him and crying and saying goodbye. We went in and decided to stay with him. He was so far gone, they couldn't find the back leg vein and then it collapsed on them. He didn't even fight the vet... he was just too weak. Normally he was so feisty. They moved to the front leg, found the vein and a second later it was over. I still get teary think about it. God, we loved that cat - we got him just months after getting married. He followed us everywhere and slept at our feet and crawled in our laps...

    I still wonder if we waited too long when at the time I wondered, is it really his time yet? When they just slowly get ill, it's hard to pinpoint WHEN is too much suffering. While we have two lovely cats now... I will miss Nimby for a long time.
     
  6. i'm sending good vibes to you and your kitty... what did your vet say? is your kitty still eating and drinking?
     
  7. -Hugs- Keep us updated.
     
  8. madamefifi, I am so sorry - my beloved dog is aging, too, and I am terrified of finding myself in a similar situation. Try not to worry about making the wrong decision - you'll know what is best for her. <HUGS>