How do you deal with cheap boyfriends?

  1. So my boyfriend of 2 years had his birthday a few months ago and I went all out and got him this really nice watch he's had his eye on forever but couldn't get bc it was so expensive along with some clothes from high end boutiques. I seriously planned ahead for MONTHS to make sure the presents were all perfect and put so much thought into it.

    So flash forward a few months and it's my birthday. And guess what he gets me? A COACH SKINNY MINI that he picked up at the mall the WEEK BEFORE!!! (Now don't get me wrong I LOVE Coach, but a skinny mini for your girlfriend's birthday present? You can pick one up at the outlets for like $25!). And then we ate BURRITOS at Chipotles to complete the wonderful evening.

    Am I being completely superficial?? I just really wanted something thoughtful.. or even no present and just dinner or dessert somewhere nice where we both dressed up. I'm not really that high maintenance. Every time we eat out at restaurants, I usuallly foot the bill bc he pays for the gas to drive up to visit me (he lives in another city).

    I just really really wanted ONE perfect night for my birthday where everything is romantic and sweet...but I guess I'll have to settle for a skinny mini and a burrito :cry:
     
  2. ugh guys can seriously be so inconsiderate and totally oblivious...........i'm still working on training my boyfriend (and it's been five years) and i swear with patience and gentle (or not so gentle :lol:) pushing they learn.....i hope you feel better about this year :sad: but maybe for your next birthday or event just start early, dropping little hints here and there about what kind of night you'd like (or talk about your friends/their boyfriends and how they celebrate) and stuff.....of course nothing too obvious but gentle hinting throughout the year might sort of make him think it's his idea..........my boyfriend used to never ever ever make reservations for ANYTHING......made me sooooo :mad:......3-4 years later he finally picked that up.....thank goodness :nuts:

    oh and thanks to me he finally (kinda) mastered the art of gift-giving
     
  3. Aw, I'm sorry Sparkles... my hubby was a little "rough around the edges" when we were dating, too. I, too, am very thoughtful when it comes to presents, celebrations etc. and I often remember feeling a little let down when he didn't do the same for me. It's taken some time, but now he's "learned" and really tries to do nice things. Why not give your BF some subtle hints about what you like? I bet he'll get it eventually... ;)
     
  4. If it makes you feel any better, my husband has NEVER given me a gift!!! He always tells me to go and pick it out and then he pays for it. It doesn't matter if it's a birthday, anniversary, holidays, etc. I like it this way because at least I get what I want and I don't have to make a fake happy face if it was something I wasn't thrilled with!!!:lol: :lol: :lol:
     
  5. I know exactly how you feel :suspiciou ugh! I mean, I'm not very materialistic, but sometimes its like he doesnt even try or care. That really hurts my heart sometimes, especially when I do a lot for him. He always tells me he doesnt have any money, which I completely understand, but he could at least try (he does, but he's disappointed me a lot in the past) :cry: It's the thought that counts and its like nothing at all goes on in that head of his [sigh].
     
  6. i don't know about all of you but i always have horrible birthdays. can't remember the last decent birthday i had. maybe when i turned 20. hmmm. as for cheap boyfriends, that does totally suck. my bf of 3 years is totally clueless on surprises and gifts. so now i just give him a catalogue with things i want circled and let him choose. hey it works!! it's a semi surprise but at least you know for sure you'll like it. and if that doesn't work, don't know what else to tell ya!
     
  7. oh and i forgot to say, you are so funny with "but I guess I'll have to settle for a skinny mini and a burrito [​IMG]"

    LOL. i feel your pain.
     
  8. Awwwwwwwwww. I'm sorry. Maybe he's really tight with money? Maybe he really doesn't have that much right now. I'm sorry your birthday wasn't what you thought it would be. =(
     
  9. I've dated both guys who have lots of money and guys who make just enough for rent and car payments. In all honesty, the guys with "just enough" were better in the long run. Personally, I'd be satisfied with a Mini Skinny, but I don't really like getting gifts so I suppose that works. When I'd be dating a guy who bought me oodles I felt a little inadequate. Lol. That's just me though.

    Sorry to hear your big day was a little less than satisfying. It's a bummer, I know :o(
     
  10. If that happens to me, I'll dump him... I don't like cheap guys.
     
  11. oh btw, i love your avatar, it's the ceiling in the bellagio!! jellyfish so pretty, i took a pic of it when i went there, let me see if i can find it.
     
    bellagio%20celing.jpg
  12. You ladies are so wonderful :love: All of your all's stories are making me feel so much better to know that he's not the only guy that's dysfunctional when it comes to getting gifts & planning nice dinners.

    I just hate the idea of having to spell things out exactly to tell him on what it takes to make happy. It makes me feel like I'm dating myself by having all the ideas and he's the one doing all the grunt work. And it's really not that I'm upset about dating a guy who doesn't buy me a ton of stuff. I'm lucky enough to have wonderful parents who are very generous with me. I just wanted something a little more thoughtful from him.

    I guess I'm just upset that I was expecting him to be Prince Charming for my birthday and he ended up being Prince Chipotle instead :wondering
     
  13. Haha aww thanks! I was in looove with it too when we stayed there so I took like 9 billion pics of it! :biggrin:
     
  14. the majority of guys are super thick. subtle hints don't work either. you gotta tell them outright. i gave up with mine and now i just tell him what i want for bdays/xmas/valentines. i think he prefers it that way too. doofus.
     
  15. Gift-giving fo the opposite sex is really tough because there's two different mindsets going on. Generally, guys like gadgets and projects, while girls like romance and trendy accessories, which, face it, guys know nothing about. Unless you have a guy who is gay, you know you're never gonna be able to take him shopping, because all he's gonna say is, "That looks great honey," because a. they can't tell, and b. they know if you buy it, the shopping ends faster, which minimizes their torture.

    I can also tell you when going out to eat, guys are going for the MEAL, not the ambience. Guys want to eat, they don't want a pretty plate of food with garnish unless there's a nice juicy burger with it.

    I'm sure you guys are mostly just as clueless with the guy-gifts!