How do you deal with being bullied?

  1. Hi everyone, I have a question. I'm just wondering if any of you had ever felt being bullied into buying something? It could be anything from a house to a car, or a toy or a piece of apparel? By bullying I mean really bullying, basically with the salesperson saying that you're obligated to buy the item in question regardless? If so, what was your story and how did you resolve it?

    I'll share mine here ... except mine is far from resolved. I am NOT going to mention what it is or what brand it is since I don't want to get in further trouble or be threatened ...

    Months ago I thought of getting something and upon inquiring about the specs, I found that the item was not for me. The store manager asked if I want it in a smaller size, I said that might work. So she said she'd have someone send me specs on that size with pictures and then they would take down my CC# and info after I have confirmed. I never heard back from them and then 3 weeks ago I got an email from one of the sales telling me that the item was ready and they needed me to pay for it:wtf: .

    I was a bit taken back because there was never a confirmation, never an email with the specs or pictures and such, therefore I assume that they couldn't go through with it. But, I gave them the CC# info anyway because I figure it would still be a nice thing to have even though the it may be a bit big for me (I have since then found out the specs from other people who own the same thing). I figure worst case scenario I sell and recoup some money.

    Then last week, my sister got into a car accident. A day later, a relative oversea went into the hospital and needed to go under the knife. The surgery went okay but the bills are exorbitant. To top that off, someone stole my wallet around that same time. Regarding the wallet, I found out after canceling my cards that one of the cards had a mysterious $7000+ charge on it for electronics. I called up that credit card company and they DOUBTED my dispute, saying that since I have been known to make huge purchases on that card (I buy Hermes with that card), they think the charge was legit:rant: ! Still trying to iron that out right now.

    So in short, I absolutely CANNOT go though with ANY purchases until the end of the year. By the end of this year YES but not now (although with the way I'm being treated I would NEVER buy from them again). I mean, my family should take precedence. I told the sales I couldn't go through with the transaction and she started guilt-tripping me. She said mine was a special order just for me and that it was the only one available ever - I know it was not true because I've seen the same thing in at least two other places.

    Even after telling her the reasons that I couldn't do it (which I don't believe I should even explain myself because that's my own business), she said that I was under the obligation to buy and that she was surprised that I didn't get charged first. She said I should know how this works since I buy Hermes:wtf: . Now on top of all the crap I have going on, i have to worry about getting into trouble with a store for something beyond my control ... And what gets me is the person is guilt-tripping me even though I KNOW I have not been told the truth about everything. I mean, the item cannot be one-of-a-kind if at least 2 other places have it.

    So has anyone ever been in such a situation? If so, what is it regarding? How did you resolve it?
     
  2. Did you sign anything when you gave your credit card information? If so, I'd look at that closely. I don't know perhaps you want to talk to the store manager.
     
  3. No, the credit card info was given over the phone. I just don't think it's reasonable to expect someone to buy something, especially when in this case the person is obviously not telling me the truth about the item being a "special-order for me" and how I'll be the only person who will have it.
     
  4. I think you must be insistent that you were only considering buying the item AFER you were show the pictures and 'specs'. You are under no obligation to buy something you did not agree to buy, whether they took down your information or not. If these people do not understand that family is more important, then too bad!!! Also I can't believe that they would try and guilt you into something, that is unprofessional and they have no right to do it.
     
  5. I never did explain to them the part about how I've never gotten the pictures and the specs from them. Problem is, it was the manager who said over the phone that she'd have one of her sales send me specs and pictures; so that part was not written. I never did get the specs and pics and when I called to inquire, I was told over the phone that they were "still working on it" and they never confirm that they ordered anything. So essentially, I never know they even went ahead with this until they emailed me about something coming in 3 weeks ago ... So although they didn't do what they said they would do, I couldn't prove it as all these promises and exchange were done over the phone. The only thing in writing was that email from the sales saying "We have the xxx that you ordered."
     
  6. Is it the store manager that is bullying you into buying this item? If worse comes to worse, buy it and then return it to them, they have no right to make you buy it when they have been lying to you about it. Maybe you could point out that it is not a special order item as you have seen it in several stores. Also, talk to the sales manager if the associate keeps pressuring you. Good luck!!!
     
  7. No, it's the sales who was pressuring me to buy it. Don't know what to do ...
     
  8. I think you need to tell her that you are under no obligation to buy it because you talked to the manager and then just refuse to buy it.
     
  9. But I hadn't talked to the manager yet. I'm afraid to talk to anybody there right now ... I feel like I've commited a crime or something ... ugh ... But I CANNOT get it ... I would NOT be able to forgive myself if I do. It's bad karma to be selfish ... I mean, there're couple things I have to put off buying til next year because of the current situation.
     
  10. As the saying goes, "JUST SAY NO". I don't mean any offense but you are a grown woman I would think you would be able to say I have changed my mind or my circumstances have changed and I will not be purchasing .... If the CC you left with them on file was in your stolen wallet it would not be valid anymore so there is not any fear of them charging you the amount of the item. I think if you are afraid to confront the situation maybe next time don't initiate any discussion or plans to possibly purchase until you are 100% sure you will be buying the item.
    Z
     
  11. I agree with ladyzee, Kou, you just need to tell her No. I'm not liking this boutique, I would avoid them in the future or try to find a nicer SA. Also, maybe try to get in touch with the manager asap? If it would make you feel better you could explain the situation. But I don't feel like they should need an explaination.
     
  12. I DID say NO but the sales wouldn't take NO for an answer, hence the guilt-tripping. As far as plans to purchase goes, nothing was ever formally confirmed and I never heard from them until they assumed what I wanted, went ahead and ordered, and never told me about it until something was coming. Even then, I planned on getting it because I felt bad for saying no. But the point is, I don't think I should be held responsible for something that was not confirmed. I'm just not happy about being guilt-tripped and pressured in spite of everything that is happening. If a person have to plan on buying something everytime he/she initiates a discussion about a product, then I think a good portion of people wouldn't be talking to sales people at all.
     
  13. I just don't think I was at fault. I mean, if today they sent me the information and I confirmed "Oh yes, this picture is right, this specs is correct, this is EXACTLY it. Order please and please CONFIRM when you have ordered" and then they DID confirm, THEN I consider it an actual transaction and confirmation ... If I can only talk to a salesperson when I am sure I want to buy something, then shopping will be a very difficult process considering I know at least with clothes, I always have to ask about it (try it on or ask the sales to retrieve one that's in my size) first.:push:
     
  14. Is the salesperson still planning to charge you or do you need to go into the store and talk to her? Can you just tell her that you won't make any decisions until you talk to her manager? You could tell her flat out that you don't appreciate being made to feel guilty over something that you shouldn't feel guilty about. :rant:
     
  15. You should also complain about her to the manager! I would get so mad at getting bullied like that!