he says I like you

  1. Hi girls... I am new here..

    It seems like a great place with great people.. I need your advice ladies..

    I am of asian living in oz, so far i have not dated any oz just cos i stay away as I dont want the complication of liking someone and cant go back to my asian country. the reasoning behind it goes deeper as my parents are separated.. my mom is alone there, visa probs, so i got to back and cant stay in oz forever.

    Ok so, .. I am a serious relationship kind of girl, never had a one night stand kind (is that wierd?) and i met this guy who is not so serious. He said he had about 5 serious relationship so far, and as far as I can tell, he has never been in lurve.

    anyway.. I met this guy at my class, worked on an assignment together, only went out once for coffee. And chat thru msn. and from chatting, lead to flirting and he said I like you. is it possible to say I like you when all the communications going on have not really been a face to face one?

    anyway when he said 'i like you' I didnt quite respond in words but I think he would know I feel quite the same way. I like him too, but i found he is so different from me. He is very outgoing, he more into pubs, going out drinking, and very 'experienced' :shame: I do go out drinking but its just not that much like oz do.. like any opportunity they get!. Side qs, is it normal to have 30 partners by the age of 24?! He kind of scared me off!

    Frankly I am rather tempted to give this a try as he seems to fit what I am looking for except for the oz part, and the 'experienced' part. he also mentioned that he is looking for someone who doesnt need him. I am not needy but I am just concerned if that would lead to problems.

    but I cant see myself staying in oz (just in case I fall in love)

    is it worth a try? I dont want to get my heart broken.

    my friend suggested innocent flirting thing, but.. thats still is very tempting...I dont think I can stop at that, once I started, like I said there is a possibility that I can like him alot. And plus I worry about getting involved sexually part. Is it possible to just flirt without getting involved sexually?

    comments appreciated =)
     
  2. Stop where you are and don't go futher, IMO. He did mention that he wants someone who doesn't need him, that seems to me he just wants someone to have fun with without any emotional attachment.

    You seem like a sweet and innocent girl. If you think you won't be able to control yourself and will possibly like him a lot, then don't start it, cos he won't reciprocate and you might be heartbroken later.

    The fact that you are worried about getting involved sexually shows that you know on some level, that this guy is just after sex, and obviously you're not willing. If this is the case, then why even bother to have "innocent flirting". You know it won't end up innocent.

    You don't sound like you are the type who can enter into a flirting relationship as a sort of "game", without getting emotionally attached. So i'd advise you to stay away.
     
  3. Ditto on cakelover's reply. My thoughts exactly!! :girlsigh:
     
  4. I agree.....sounds like he's just looking to have a good time...which is fine as long as both people are in agreement that that is all it is.

    Sounds like you might get attached to this guy so I'd say steer clear of this one....you'll probably only end up getting hurt down the road.
     
  5. I agree as well. To me it comes across that this guy is only interested in hooking up. Steer clear and wait for a guy to come along that is looking for the same type of relationship that you are looking for - be that innocent flirting or not.
     
  6. Yes, I agree that you need to be VERY CAREFUL.

    You have a fabulous sense of humor -- I love the Oz metaphor! -- so I'm sure a lot of guys here really will like you a lot. But so many men here just want to hook up and you, being new, are going to appear to be a very innocent, easy target.

    So I'd say, go out and have a great time, but take a LONG time to get to know guys before you let things go any further than talking and flirting. BE CAREFUL.
     
  7. thank u girls.. u r all so sweet... what u all said actually reflects what i have been feeling, just the temptation is getting to my head. I need girls like u here in oz now.. =)

    hmm.. i think I am sending rather mixed signals cos I am confused myself.
    I like him cos he has some qualities that I look for - example.. he is smart, honest, blunt but in a nice way, interesting to talk to.

    but I am not sure if I want to get further just cos I found some differences that matter to me. For example, I work full time and I would ideally like to be with someone who work in corporate or at least 9 to 5 job. He works part time and has never ever has a 9 to 5 job, I find it a little disturbing cos we are 24 and in my opinion, at least there should be some kind of serious work experience or a plan to have one?


    I think he knows I like him too, but I also told him just be friends cos I think we are different. But as days went pass, I found more things I like about him, and I am afraid I might look beyond the things that I dont like about him.

    is there away to turn this around.. keep the friendship... keep the flirting under control...(or okay.. no flirting..)

    I hate to break friendship juz cos I decided not to hook up with someone.

    I guess when I met a lot of people in oz who are more carefree than where I come from. Friends telling me that i need to expand my horizon.. cos I frankly havent dated any european/oz.. i dont know to feel lucky or actually missing out for never having no string attached relations.. friends here said.. definitely missing out.. I feel like a goody two shoes.. and I hate it frankly.

    could someone comment on "Side q, is it normal to have 30 partners by the age of 24?! ".. really I like to know.

    Thanks girls
     
  8. If you don't think this would lead to what you want, stop where you are. I wouldn't even do any flirting with him if you know that it's not going to work out. Just stay friends.

    I've only been with one guy since I was in the dating age and we're still together. Not everyone has done one night stands or anything. I have only had 1 partner ever and so does my BF.
     
  9. i agree with all the other ladies....stop it here!!!:biggrin:
     

  10. agreed! you took the words right out of my mouth.:yes:
     
  11. Ok, STOP RIGHT THERE. DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT even bother~~ Seriously! As for innocent flirting, don't even do that. You NEVER know how things can turn out and in this case, flirting can even be playing with fire especially when you already like him. If I were you, I will actually try to avoid him (out of sight, out of mind) because from experience, it's hard (at least for me) to not care or not feel if I'm going to run into that person often.

    As for 30 partners ... well, different people will have different views on that. But for me, 30 partners will SCARE me away:lol: . But then again, I'm the kind of person who likes my guys sealed and un-opened, like my Hermes bags. But seriously speaking, he's 24, had 30 partners, said he wanted someone who is not needy ... this guy is NOT looking for a relationship, NO MATTER how he may put it. Save yourself the heartache and give your love to someone who is much more deserving.:flowers:
     
  12. If the guy I'm dating has 30 partners before the age of 24, I would start running. :wtf: But then he is a guy and they tend to exaggerate the # of past partners (I'm stereotyping here). :shrugs:

    I'm Asian too and I have a more of a conservative view when it comes to # of partners. 30+ partners will definitely scare me away!

    If you're looking a fun fling (which I know you're not), then try him out. If not, there are other men out there in Oz.

    Speaking of Aussies, I do find their men very attractive. :graucho:
     
  13. :roflmfao::roflmfao::roflmfao:
     
  14. They really do exist! I know at least 3 of them in their late 20s. They're not badlooking, they're nice guys and quite successful. They've just never been in serious relationships since they were too caught up with their work and studies. They're actually pretty normal too.

    And my did SO come sealed and unopened as well, so guys like that still exist.:yes:
     
  15. 30 partners would also piss me off:lol: I'd have 60 partners before I date a guy with 30 partners:p :p Gotta even the field a bit. J/k.

    Well, hypothetically speaking of course ... since I would never date a guy with 30 partners so I won't be trying for that 60-partner quota thing ever ... Ok, I better stop before I start scaring everybody:p