Guilt over frustration on kids activities?

  1. Ok, now that it is almost over, I feel I can vent /complain a bit....just a bit.

    My 2 youngest boys have had hockey camp on and off all summer. Because they are at different times (different age/skill levels), just the fetching them back and forth takes it toll, not to mention the time at the rink watching them. Between the 2 of them, it is pretty much all day (from 8:30 until 3:00) practice once a week (Mondays for one and Thursdays for the other) from 6 -8 pm and games on still have all the regular chores/daily stuff to deal with.

    Don't get me wrong, I am glad for them to play and enjoy watching them....but after a time, I just feel so drained...then guilty for feeling that way...kwim?

    Please tell me I am not alone and I am not a horrible, selfish you get 'tired' too?
  2.'re not alone. It's easy to feel drained from all those parents always told us when they did!! lol :smile:)

    that's why u have vent!
  3. You're not alone. It was years ago, but I remember our 2 boys in all their sports--football, baseball, golf. We drove all over Chicagoland--I knew every baseball field and golf course there was. For a few years they were in different baseball leagues because of age difference and dh and I split up trying to cover them both. And then there's team mom who works the pop stand making hot dogs, etc.

    I really had little free time during those years. It IS tiring and the lack of ME time is an issue. From what I know from friends, hockey is about the most demanding of the youth sports so you have it worse than most.

    Try not to let the time go by in a blur; I'm sure they are in these activities because of desire, talent, etc. but be sure they and you aren't over-scheduled. You want to really experience these years with your children, not just be the taxi.

    Best wishes--they grow up so quickly. Looking back, it went by in a flash.
  4. My second job is working for the Ducks at their official training facility and i can't tell you how many hockey mom's and dad's i have become close with by just seeing them EVERYDAY and talking to them and yes they vent about how draining it is! So your definitely not alone. ;)
  5. Why do you need to stay there all day? Don't you usually drop the kids off to camp, then go do whatever it is you do normally. Maybe watch them for an hour or so?
    Is there really a point of you being there for 7 hours?
  6. Sometimes when your kids are young, you feel like your own life gets lost in all the demands you have placed on you as a parent. Hang in there.... SUMMER IS ALMOST OVER!!!!
  7. I can relate, not as a Mom but as a former hockey kid. My brother played and I plyed in a girl's league. We also did summer hockey camp (as well as various other camps all related to ice skating). However, my parents just dropped us off at our camps and picked us up later.
    Also...for games and stuff I remember my parents working out a schedule where Dad did my games 50% of the time and Mom did them the other they never had to worry about being at 2 games on opposite sides of the city at the same time...and we always had one parent there.
    hockey is demanding because it is 12 months of the year. Fortunately, I quit in my early teens...and my brother was scouted by the NHL but told he was too thin/skinny to hack it as a defensive player so he quit at 16.
    This was also up in Canada..where this is pretty much the norm for maybe the support system for parents is better IDK!
  8. i think tink means just being their taxi and supporting them takes up so much time, not that she is with them all of the time.
  9. The problem is they are in different camps (age/skill level driven), AM one for the little one, afternoon for the older one. Rink is about a hour hour away and the gear is pretty intense so helping them suit up takes another 15 minutes or so. And you do have to help them...even with the older one, I have to help him with his laces, as they need to be really tight. So for the little one I drop him off, watch for half hour or so, go home. I have about a half hour at home, and leave to take older one to the rink, usually in the afternnon I just stay because it is not worth the back and forth for the half hour spare time, kwim?
  10. I must admit, thankfully hubby does coach for 1 of their teams (alternating years) so at least during the main 'season' he handle 100% of 1 (except an occasional game, for show of support) and the other one he still does the lion share. It's just the summers that get hectic for me.

    Thanks everyone for your supportive words:smile:
  11. lol that's what my parents did after watching me every weekday for at least 3 hours each time for figure-skating, and THEN it got worse, they complained about just driving me!!!!! lol

    To Twinkle, your children are usually safe and supervised by the coach and many other parents are there too, so don't feel bad if you need to leave them there. I'm sure your children will understand (or at least I'm not mad at my parents lol). Even if you have 1/2 hour in between picking them up, just get yourself a coffee or something! :yes:

  12. YEa....that would help!!!!! Once they get a little older they won't even want you going into the rink with me!!! LOL
  13. OMG your crazy. We have 5 kids between me and my DH. At one point they all did activities, and it seemed like they did it just for the sake of doing it. We never ate dinner as a family, homework barely got done. It was just horrible. I put my foot down and the sports STOPPED. My kids all started getting straight A's, we had family dinners everynight and overall it was the right move for our family. None of our kids were sports nuts, and didnt really care. Its almost like its expected in our area and to me that was not a reason to do the sports. I never felt bad and you shouldnt either!!!!! Your not selfish, your just stretched. You have to take care of yourself to be able to take good care of your kids.
  14. Sounds hectic...but your such a great mom to give them such experiences...and you should not feel guilty....

    I only have one boy...yet didnt do much of the "activities" thing....

    Because I had to work, I put him to a private school, where most activities came to the music, cooking, karate.....

    Then for sports, I would do 1/2 day or full day camps for summer, where I would drop them off and that was that. I would make 2-3, unannounced visits a week and would stay to watch....but after I got comfortable, I stopped that too.....

    I just cant do the run around thing.....even when I stopped working...I did more of the taxi thing to his friends houses and things...but activites, I cut to one and others are provided by his school and done mostly in school........

    For me, unless he totally loves and adores a certain activity....I dont want to invest too much time or money.....I dont like kids to be too busy....
  15. Same here. I'll probably send my son to soccer camp next year since he's expressed an interest - he also loves swimming and does that non-competitively. He may join cub scouts, also if he's very interested, not otherwise.