Friend has hots for husband?

  1. Ok I have a friend lets call her Betsy. Betsy and I have been cool since about 2000 we met working for the same company and started hanging out. Betsy has had a few run ins with some not so respectful guys. She was seeing this one guy who totaly ignored her and the only way she could get his attention was to treat him to dinner, movies and buy him gifts :sad: I told her I didnt think that was cool, this was all happening back about 3 years ago. We lost touch for a while after I got married 4 yrs ago cause she stopped calling me and when I would call her she would seem uninterested in conversating with me, same thing happened with a few others after I got married.

    Now here's the problem Betsy and I started hanging out again last summer and I noticed she is always asking me about DH. For example if we are on the phone I will start talking to her about something and outta nowhere she is like "so what time does your husband get home" :confused1:
    Or a few weeks ago I let her borrow my ceramic hair iron and when she came over to return it I was in the bathroom putting on my makeup, hubby and I were about to have a date night. So she says "where is your husband?what time is he coming home?" :confused1: So at this point i'm thinking ok whats going on here, this isnt the fist time she has said this and the time I mentioned before wasnt the first either. So I replied to her "He went to play basketball at the gym, he will be here soon" So she seemed to be standing around waiting for him to come :confused1: :confused1: When hubby arrived he spoke and went straight to our bedroom (to change I guess) I was in the bathroom and she was standing in the hallway. I was talking to her and she started talking to my husband :confused1: it was as if she was more interested in talking to him than me. And hubby usually just ignores her for the most part and gives one word answers. So you will not believe what she said to him, she says "Did you have fun playing ball? whats wrong you're sore?" :shocked: meanwhile I am in the bathroom just in a bit of shock that she thinks its ok to say something like this to her friends husband. I guess it would be different if they were also friends. Anyway hubby pretty much ignored her and ended up shutting the bedroom door.
    Do you all think she may have the hots for him or am I just a bit paranoid :confused1: In a way I think she may just be lonely, what do you all think?
     
  2. your gut instinct as a woman is usually right. I would just come right out and ask her, "do you have the hots for my hubby or something?" she'll either get really embarrassed and back off or she will get defensive and you'll never hear from her again. Either way, you get some peace.
     
  3. If your spiddy sense is going off, it is probably for a good reason. Listen to it and stay away.
     
  4. Get rid of her! She's crushing on your hubby.
     
  5. Your Spidey Sense is usually right. Women's intution can be a ***** but I have found that mine is always accurate. Say something.
     
  6. I'm not an insecure woman and I trust my DH husband very much, I just cannot believe her. *SIGH* She came over once wearing pumps when there was fresh fallen snow on the ground , I asked her if she wanted a pair of my shoes so she wouldn't fall and she said "oh I'll be ok". Hubby was coming in as she was leaving and as she started to walk off our pourch she said "____ will you help me to my car please?" and then she started shriking and making all these crazy noisy and gestures like she was gonna fall. Hubby grabbed the bag of salt from behind our door and sprinkled it down our pathway for her to walk on. Then she's like "oh look at all this ice on my window" I guess she thought he was gonna scrape the ice for her he didn't he started scraping my car so It would be ready for morning. I'm getting angry just thinking that she would try to be so coniving :cursing:
     
  7. No reason to invite her back into your house or your life. Why plant the seed for trouble?
     
  8. Hmmm...I can't really tell what is going on. I know that I have girlfriends and they know my husband well but they have never pulled any type of 'tricks' like the ones you describe. My husband doesn't even give them the impression that they can even play around with him in that way in the first place....lol. He's friendly with them but they are basically 'my friends'. They've known him since we've been together and we've been together for 18 years and been married 15 years.
    They'd never think to ask my husband to walk them to their car or anything like that. I mean, unless it was for a real reason..like she was carrying something very heavy--and more than likely I'd be the one to ask him to do it for her...lol.
    Yeah, your friend sounds like trouble. She's probably jealous and is trying to test your husband and your marriage. Women like that usually think all men are no good--they've never had a good one themselves.
    I'd let her go. If you don't you are probably asking for trouble in this situation. It's not about your husband---it's about her and her blatant disrespect for you and your marriage as a friend.
     
  9. She sounds lame. Get rid of her and spare yourself some grief. You shouldn't have to worry about where a friend's loyalty lies. Good luck!
     
  10. I would say you should not be friends with her anymore. I really have no tolerance for these kinds of people- I've dealt with enough! I would say you shouldn't have to deal with someone like this. Hang out with friends that don't make you worry.
     
  11. I had a friend like this years ago. She would be so sorry to whoever's BF she slept with, & it wouldn't happen again. We were young. She was an extremely jealous woman, couldn't stand to see someone get a BF cause it would take away from "her" time.
    Then I met her family which exposed the psychology of why she was this way.
    So I quit returning her calls.
    You don't need a friend like this.
     
  12. I think she definently has the hots for your DH! If your instinct says to stay away...then listen to it!

    My sister's friends like to flirt with my DH alot and he flirts back (they text alot) but I am completely trusting...he hasnt given me ANY reason as to why he would try to do anything with anyone so I just take it as harmless flirting...but they're nothing like what your "friend" is doing...I applaud your DH for being very respectful to you and trying to shut her out.
     
  13. ITA!
     
  14. One of my best friends flirts with my husband. I think it is so funny. Most people don't understand how I can find this funny but it is because they go over the top joking around. I trust my dh more than life itself and I know he would never cheat.
    It really depends on who you are with though. My ex boyfriend became friendly with the same girl and used to hang out with her once in awhile. I used to get mad because I didn't trust him and told him she was my friend, not his and it bothered me when they hung out without me. It had nothing to do with her because I've known her for so long.
    Maybe your friend just feels better getting male attention and doesn't realize she is doing something wrong. You should tell her and if she doesn't say something like, "wow, i didn't even think of what I was doing" and gets mad at you, then its obvious she was doing it on purpose, to either get you mad or steal your hubby.
    Women can be nasty sometimes.
     
  15. i vote for talking to her about it. maybe she is just that clueless about her actions.