flirting: harmless?

  1. i got in an *ahem* discussion with my brother over this last night. i say as long as you go home to your SO and disclose somewhere (and in my case OFTEN) within the conversation how much you love your SO, flirting is harmless. it's a quick ego boost and perks me up. he says it's disrespectful because guys, no matter who they are and relationship or not, don't see it that way.

    what do you all think?
     
  2. i must agree with your brother...i find it rude and completely unacceptable. it's one thing to say that a girl/guy is hot but it's another to go right up to someone and start chatting them up. you've gotta draw the line somewhere and that's where mine is...it's different for everyone tho.
     
  3. Oh, I'm sounding like such an old prude today, but your SO is right. It's disrespectful to your relationship to flirt with someone else. Guys are sort of dense when it comes to flirting anyway. Most of them misinterpret it as a "come on" and that's probably why they don't like their girlfriends/wives flirting with other men.

    If a guy is secure in the relationship, he's OK with his SO having male "friends", but flirting is a whole different matter.
     
  4. Flirting is harmless. And yes, it's true that men think differently but as long as no one crosses the boundaries, IMO it's okay.
     
  5. I think that a man's issue shouldn't be my issue. Second of all, flirting has a variety of interpretations. So if a guy who i know says hi, and I say hi back.. he can interpret it as I'm flirting... LOL So because of the variety of interpretations, it really can't be deemed disrespectful. If a guy finds it disrespectful, it's because in theory he's disrespecting himself... he knows the other person is in a relationship, yet chooses to still believe he has a chance? Whatever!!!:lol:
     
  6. fair enough. :yes:

    i guess my interpretation of 'flirting' is full on eye-batting, hair-flipping, legs-crossing-and-uncrossing, come-hither-look-throwing-type-flirting, hehe!! :lol:

    like i mentioned before...everyone has their boundaries...and it's important to make clear where yours lie when you start a new relationship.
     
  7. A hard one really, I hate the idea of anyone flirting with my SO!!! But I don't suppose it really hurts. Personally I wouldn't but only because I would be scared the guy would take it the wrong way!!

    The jurys out for me!:yes:
     
  8. To me, flirting and being friendly are two different things. I'm friendly but I certainly do not flirt. I do not allow strange men to chat me up. A couple of weekends ago, a guy came up to me at the library to 'chat', and I just gave him a curt answer and walked away. I just don't like it.

    A few years ago, I went to a conference with a colleague who was newly married. She flirted like mad, at the dinner/dance, she slowdanced with one man (who was married) and let another nuzzle her neck (he was also married), among other things. I was horrified. In her mind, 'nothing' happened, but in my mind, a LOT happened. She was having a good time, but I think she crossed the line big time. :rant: If my husband nuzzled some strange woman's neck or let some strange woman nuzzle his neck, it's instant divorce court!
     
  9. Flirting is very harmful in my opinion. Being too friendly is also harmful because then you get the opposite (or same) sex thinking there is something there when there isn't
     
  10. I'm going to sound like a prude too, but flirting is totally disrespectful of the SO! And men are all horndogs so what to you is flirting to them is "oh boy, maybe I'm going to get me some!" ;) lol
     
  11. I agree flirting is not allowed!
     
  12. I don't think flirting is that big of a deal as long as you are both focused on each other. My SO is a flirt, it's one of the things I like about him, I like that he's confident and funny. And I'm a terrible flirt and he doesn't mind as long as I come home with him :graucho: We're respectful of each other. But I think it depends on the relationship. I've dated guys who I would flirt around to attract their attention or "get back at them" for flirting with other women and ignoring me. Those are both really bad reasons to flirt. But a flirtatious attitude, I don't think it causes much harm if both partners are comfortable with it.
     
  13. Ooh, by flirting I mean chatting in an enthusiastic way, joking, smiling etc, NOT nuzzling and touching and stuff! That's way over the line IMO.
     
  14. I think men have a very strong attitude towards flirting - they take it more seriously than woman do. Woman can have a guy flirt with them and it is an ego boost. A guy - he automatically thinks, oooh, she wants me.
     
  15. hrm. interesting. i guess i'm having a hard time wrapping my head around the idea because 1) it honestly wouldn't bother me if my husband flirted with someone, as long as he came home to me 2) i don't know any women my age in long term relationships that don't flirt once in a while and 3) flirting to me has always been entertaining silly fun to laugh at later, not the way to start a relationship...so i've never really associated it with that.

    looks like i'll need to start looking elsewhere for an ego boost. :yes: