feeling blue: need some career/school advice-anyone a buyer/seller/personal shopper?

  1. Hi tpf,

    I just want to start of by saying that I am really thankful for this forum. It gives me a place to turn to when I feel like I have nowhere to go and no one else really understands my problem.

    I had an emotional breakdown today where I just started to cry at home because I just got my midterm back from this "supposedly" easy astronomy course and I have gotten a 60% @#@)#( on.

    My marks at school have not been good lately, I don't know what's wrong with me. I am in third year University and I am trying really hard but I just seem to be struggling. The thing is, when I am in the exam room taking the exam I thought I would do ok, however, when I get my marks back, my grades are about 10-15% worse than what I expected.

    What frustrates me the most is that I feel really frustrated by the things I'm learning in my major, it is just not applicable to what I want to do in life which is being a clothing buyer/seller or a personal shopper. I tell my friends and family about my career goals but they are really unsupportive. They think that such jobs are for rich kids (I am definately NOT one) or people with good connections. Also, they don't think that such a field is stable or realistic.

    I am really miserable in University and I've never felt so bad about myself intellectually as I do now. I am just in this big slump and I don't know what to do. I have one more year until I graduate and I don't know if I should do a minor or not, since doing a minor would just be trying to get the "most" out of my tuition. I know that being a buyer/seller/merchandiser has nothing to do with anything I am learning right now at school.

    Is there some college or University program (perferably in Canada as I am canadian) where I can learn about being a fashion merchandiser?

    thanks for taking the time to read my post... I just feel like no one around me understands what I am going through and just this tremdenous feeling of lost and frustration that I am going through now.

    I feel so useless and everyone else around me just think of my interest (shopping/fashion) as non practical.

    I was never known as a "smart" kid in highschool but I was far from stupid. I've always had above average grades and when I tried I was able to pull off some pretty amazing papers and art work...

    but nowadays it seems like I try and try and nothing comes out of my studying... I've never fought so hard just so I wouldn't fail a course

    I don't know, I just feel REALLY REALLY stupid

    and on top of it all, a few days ago, the person I've been dating for two years, someone who I thought I love and trust with all my heart and will eventually marry one day said this to me

    we were talking about how I've changed into a completely different person from when we first started dating to now...

    and basically what they said to me was that ever since we started dating he feels he's a stupider person because I am the one he talks to the most and he sounds like me and he's embarressed to talk to his friends (who are in law and poli sci) because they no longer "get" him and they have less common topics because his IQ has lowered from being around me so much

    and that it saddens him that he is no longer the "witty and clever person" that he was before ME
     
  2. For starters, some of my worst grades ever were in those supposedly "easy" general ed classes... I got a "C" in RELIGION, and failed several oceanography quizzes, among many others. They just didn't interest me. What exactly is your major? You'll never do really well until you find the major/courses you love. :smile: I have close to a 3.9 in my major, and loved every minutes of my classes. I don't know anything about fashion merchandising... would that be related to business/marketing... maybe even art-related? Hmm. Sorry I'm not much help, but don't beat yourself up over lower-than-expected grades in school. You'll find your niche... :heart:
     
  3. Aww I'm so sorry you're feeling blue :sad: . I definitly had those times in college too, where I jsut HATED the classes I was taking but couldnt do anything about it b/c they were required for me to graduate. If you want to be a buyer, I would suggest majoring in something related to business...finance, marketing, etc... There is no real "major" for a buyer, but companies that hire buyers look for people with a business type degree. I'm sure your parents can't object to you getting a degree in finance or marketing! As for being a personal shopper, maybe you could try getting a weekend job at a department store or boutique. That may at least get you in the door. High end department stores always have personal shoppers for their clients. I hope you feel better!
     
  4. When I first entered college, I was in a very liberal school, in which there wasn't as much structure as I needed. I build computers, and I BOMBED COMPUTER SCIENCE!!! lol

    I was also an Art Major, because I had literally been doing art all my life (ever art class in Elementary to HS, plus AP Art). Once I switched to a smaller, more organized school, I thought I would do better...but I didn't. I was getting terrible grades in art, and I hated my professors. But I loved my gen ed history and English courses. So I switched my major! English major, History minor :smile: My grades are great now, lol! Sometimes, it takes more than one go at a major to find your niche, and sometimes it takes even a couple years to get into the groove of things at your college. My grades in English get higher with each semester! I thought I was unbelievably dumb when I first arrived at college...I mean, who the hell gets D's in art after doing art all their life?! Now I know I just wasn't in the right place.

    My sister is a Fashion Merchandising major at FSU. She is working her ass off, because there are some really tough courses needed (both fashion and business classes). I do not know everything involved, but hell her major sounds rougher than mine! But I really think it's because she is at a really large school, and doesn't get the hands-on attention that I can get because my school is a small one. And she's a drama queen, so she's probably making it sound worse than it really is :rolleyes: But she seems to really like it, and looks forward to working in the field once she graduates.

    What is your major right now?

    And wow, that person you love so much sounds like he's being a d*****bag :shocked:
     
  5. Hang in there. When you can finally see the end, it will get better, I promise : )
     
  6. Sorry to hear you are having a rough time. Astronomy is a very hard class that requires lots of time to practice problems, memorize, etc. You should talk to your professors and tell them you are having a hard time and that you really want to do your best. This way they will put a face and situation on your exam next time and they may be a bit more lenient. They may also give you pointers on what to study for the next exam. All I can say is to not give up now!!! You only have a year or two and after that, it will be over!

    Maybe your boyfriend senses and sees that you are no longer that interested in academics and is a bit disappointed. Some people really think that education is the key to everything, so maybe he is just scared that you are not interested and chose a very bad example or way of telling you. Your excitement on being a fashion buyer/merchandise/personal shopper is great to hear. Try to understand where your family and boyfriend are coming from...they may not know much about the career and see it as unstable and perhaps not financially rewarding. They only want the best for you, so expect to have a VERY hard time convincing them that this is the best career for you. Don't be surprised that they are not supportive...they just don't know enough about it.

    For now, concentrate on your classes so your confidence will shine through, so your boyfriend will understand that you care about your future and that you do not need to be with anyone that blames you for their intellectual decline. That's his problem.

    Do you study together? Do you study with other people? This does help...sometimes, but it does motivate you. I think that things will start looking up once you start getting good marks again.

    Everything falls into place, you will see. If they ask about your future, tell people you are just concentrated on graduating and that you are not sure yet. People can be very judgemental when they do not know about certain careers. In the meantime, do try to work very hard on what you want...I'm sure that career is very competitive and demanding. Hang in there!!!:flowers:
     
  7. Astronomy is HARD. I see a lot of non-science majors take astronomy as their science requirement as they think it will mostly consist of observations and some report writing. However, a lot of astronomy formulas etc are derived from physics. These given as formulas in undergrad astronomy for students to handle without knowing exactly where they come from, or how they were ever derived. This makes it moredifficult for students to remember them under stress, or even remember how to use them. I've had plenty of experience with this situation as I have taught undergraduate Astronomy for several semesters.


    Things you can to do improve your grades, which I've suggested to many of my students:

    1. Try to go to a lab, or an extra lab in astronomy to help you out with things that you fail to visualise when it is taught in class. i.e. Right ascension, declination and stuff like that is better visualized with a star globe. Also calculations with the equator and ecliptic are easier to visualise in lab. Ask your instructor for help if you don't understand.

    2. Get a good calculator, and get units and measures straight. I am sorry to say this, but many astronomical calculations involve very large numbers and trying to do the math with a calculator on a cellphone is a no-no. Be very aware of the laws of exponents, how to multiply and divide exponents. These are where students commit their most erroneous mistakes in exams.

    3. Do conversions correctly, practice this at home. you'll find different units in astronomy, AUs , parsecs etc which are not heard of anyplace else except in astronomy so remember the conversions from one to another, including centimeters to meters and so on. These are things that kids again mess up under stress.

    4. Same for fractions. When in a hurry, I've seen many really good students make mathematical errors. These make you lose lots of points because most of astronomy involves substituting numbers in a simple or not so simple formula so it is not possible to give much parital credit. You either put the numbers in corectly or you don't.

    5. Ask your instructor before exam what parts of the syllabus he intends to cover, and find a group of people you can study with together.

    This are just some simple guidelines for your astronomy course. I don't know much about fashion merchandising etc, but think of the astronomy course as one more step you have to take to reach your goal. Don't let a bad mideterm mess your head up. You have another midterm (maybe 2) and a final ahead of you. So study hard, and good luck! PM me if you have any parts of astronomy that are hard to understand, and I'll help you out.
     
  8. if serves as an inspiration to you: I have a full time job, have a family (little girl) & husband, I go to school for my MBA on Mondays (I get home at 11:00 pm at night) and Saturdays. I only get to study on late evenings and Sundays. Still get B+ and A. Study hard. Look for related topics on the internet. The most imp.: Change your attitude. You are NOT stupid. Feel great about yourself and you'll see how everything starts to positively change around you. Don't get frustrated. practice, practice, practice. Don't give up until you get it right!
     
  9. I understand, it seems like I am losing motivation because everything I do, I never seem to get it right, and going to University has taught me one thing so far, is that I can't! Before University I believed in myself and I thought that everything will be all right in the end. But now, I just feel like I can't do anything at all. Every test I take I end up with a 60something it is really frustrating! I can walk out of the exam hall feeling great about my performance and when I get the test back, it would be a low 60 something

    Btw, I'm an English major, and everyone is telling me to go into teaching afterwards, but with my grades now I can't even make it to Education (the faculty wouldn't accept me because of my poor average) Its too late for me to change my major into business or something like that and my school doesn't offer anything for fashion. The only thing I can think of is getting a minor in international relations

    I also tried teaching abroad in Japan in second year but I learned that it really was not my thing over there and Tokyo is a really complicated city that is not too welcoming for foreigners. I can't imagine living for longer than a year there but I am thankful for the experience because it has show me my love of fashion and handbags =)

    and thanks for the suggestion of finding work in a large scale department store, unfortunately I only have One high end department store here which is Holt renfew and I don't think they have alot of personal shoppers.

    I just want to thank everyone for their response, its really sweet of you to care and although I am not feeling that great about myself, I hope to get over this slump in the next few days...

    I just wish I feel like I don't absolutely suck and that I do belong in University
     
  10. HUGs just some you time and just breathe and get your head on straight. Otherwise no matter what you try to accomplish you won't be proud of or enjoy. good luck