Ever live in a scary neighborhood?

  1. I suppose this is not the most common issue on this board...but wanted to seek solace in my favorite place. :heart:

    At the moment, I am living with my mother in an apartment. As a musician, income is very inconsistent. My mother is ill, and will be having surgery sometime in the next couple of months. These are a couple of the reasons we are living here. We are very blessed, but with inconsistent income and high CA property values, we live in a sketchy neighborhood, and I am feeling frightened...more for my mother than myself.

    Could you possibly spare a prayer? :heart:

    I just...don't have anywhere else to vent. :lol:
  2. Hugs to you!
    My neighborhood was not necessarily scary but my street name was ELM ST!!! :wtf::roflmfao: Every single one of my friends growing up thought it was so creepy! haha...
  3. :lol: I'd be scared living on Elm St as well!

    Thanks for the hugs. :heart:
  4. horrible things can happen in the very best neighborhoods.

    just use common sense and be aware of your surroundings. keep your guard up, and be aware of the people that know your comings and goings. don't do things to draw attention to your belongings, that is usually what attracts crime.

    hang in there, you'll be just fine. take good care of your mom.
  5. Take care of you!

    I grew up in a safe suburb, would go jogging all the time at night alone. When I moved in with a former flame he lived in a scary place. I had to stop jogging because I was sooo scared. I had to do it for three years and was miserable the whole time. Just be safe and smart. Invest in one of those personal alarms or peper spray if it's legal where you are.

    Hang in there!!!
  6. Thanks, girls. :heart: Guccimama, that is great advice. I suppose one often thinks the grass is always greener elsewhere! Riley, I'm so sorry you had to stop jogging! That must have put a damper on your relationship, being in such a confining place!

    I've developed eyes in the back of my head...can tell when someone is watching me. Heh. I do worry about my belongings...not that these people will know Coach or "real" jewelry, but whenever I open the front door I make sure to not let anyone see in, especially as the television and stereo system are right near the door. When I wear my nice things out, I take stock of who sees me. When outside, I do not look at the ground, but act as if I'm confident. :lol: Last night I was right outside the door, and a neighbor was sitting with friends. The electricity was out. They were smoking weed, and very loud. The guy said "I need some blow", and I did not flinch at all! :lol::tup:

    It's so weird, feeling out of place like this. Not at all that I feel I'm "better" than these people, but just in a different place mentally, and otherwise.
  7. What do you define as "scary"? I'm currently in a country where war is a real and constant threat, and I've lived in low income neighborhoods, as well as cities where the crime rates are INSANE (Mexico City, for example).

    I was never really scared by my surroundings, but there were a few incidents that made me think: yeah--this is a scary place.

    I think it's more important to know the boundaries of where "safe" is. For example, I don't go out to bars and clubs here, because I don't think it's fun to see police beating civilians in the street, nor do I want to be one of the beaten. In Mexico City, I never went out after dark EVER, and I never took the subway.

    I don't know. That's not really helpful, I guess.
  8. Legaldiva, I'm sorry if I offended. I'm so sorry you live in such a dangerous environment.

    As I said in my original post, I am very blessed. Police aren't beating civilians, there is no "war". There have been SWAT teams and gun firings here, as well as drug dealing in open areas. To me, that is frightening...but in no way am I trying to belittle those living in seriously dangerous situations. I have food on my table, a roof over my head, a loving mother, precious cats, and so forth. :heart:

    I really hope people don't take my words the wrong way. :s
  9. I grew up in the HOOD. Shootings almost every night, if not a shooting...someone was arguing or fighting. Groups of men crappin'(rollin the dice for money) and smoking weed was pretty much a given every night. I was lucky(if thats what you want to call it) to had grown up in the neighborhood, so I knew everyone and we all had mutual respect for each other. If someone messed with "the white girl" they had the whole neighborhood to deal with too:p. Nobody even thought about calling the cops because whatever was going on would be done and over with by the time they got there, which was usually 3 or 4 hours later...and who was gonna actually "snitch" anyways.
    I lived like that until I was about 16 and moved in with my SO and his parents, they also lived in a bad neighborhood, but their street was full of folks who had been there for a long time(15+ years) so their STREET was safe.
    Im glad to finally live in a neighborhood where everyone knows everyone and I can actually walk my dog at night lol.
    My advice to you is: Just be aware of your surroundings at all times. If you are really scared...maybe take a self defense class, invest in some pepper pray..maybe a tazer?? Never, EVER look vulnerable...I don't care if you have 0 self esteem and couldnt beat up a 2 year old..you better hold your head up high and your shoulders strong or you WILL get f*&$ed with! Also, I dont know exactly how bad your neighborhood is...or what your race is, but I was ALWAYS tested, because I was the only white girl. Dont let anyone punk you, or it will be like a domino effect...one person finds out you're vulnerable, everyone will know it the next day...word spreads FAST.
    Wow, this ended up being a dang book lmao.
  10. I lived in a very scary neighborhood...once spent a night layin on the floor of my bedroom as a gunfight erupted outside. I promptly moved to the suburbs after that!

    However...my best piece of advice...always be aware of your surroundings! Don't just open the door to your apartment....look around first! Always carry MACE or something with you, just in case!

    Stay safe!!!!
  11. Sending you my prayers for your mom's health and your peace of mind....

    Ive been exposed to some of what your saying and its hard.....always wondering and looking around you.....its stressful.....

    Stay safe.....its good advise to keep up the apperance of confidence and be aware......hugs*******
  12. Yes actually. It's not common sensical, but I found that if you smile at people they soften up a bit. You don't have to talk to them or anything, but you are less scared when they start smiling back or waving on a regular basis. My only other advice is just not to own expensive things, because you might get robbed.
  13. My FH grew up in a sketchy area. I moved in with him for about a year while I finished college.

    He's from a really small town, but it's very sketchy. At one time it was considered the murder captial of the country, because the number of murders per capital was the highest in the country. He graduated with 2 guys that were murdered.

    He lived on a road that had a dead end, and up on the end of the hill were 2 BIG drug houses, the one house sells weed, the other sells crack, opiates, and pills. Very nice to have them as neighbors.

    Also what made it scary was that the town was so small that everyone knew EVERYONE'S business. So add the fact that I wasn't a "townie", I felt like I stuck out like a sore thumb, saying please come and scare me.

    But I've NEVER been someone that is scared of my environment. I take basic precautions and know how to act in any given situation, so I never let things get to me.

    Stay strong and don't act scared and I think you'll be fine. :tup:
  14. I don't consider my hometown to be a bad neighborhood, but considering my high school had a stabbing or shooting every year (and none of us kids really thought much about it, just accepted it) I guess it wasn't the safest. I lived right in the middle of Asian and Hispanic gang territories, but I tried not to let their hate wars affect my life. Like the others said, I was always aware of my surroundings and would always walk the streets confidently (even if I was lost). I would look people in the eye (not staring them down or anything like that) so they knew I noticed them. I agree with carrying mace as a protectant as well. Hugs and good luck!
  15. I went to university in a medium sized town. The campus was right near that state's capitol building, the bus and train stations and the state penitentiary was just a few blocks down the street, along with a lot of halfway houses. Let's just say it was pretty routine having a lot of different types strolling through the campus or on the streets.

    My senior year I had an apartment off campus with a roommate. We weren't stupid but we were in that "i'm invincible" college mode. We lived next door to drug dealers and some other pretty shady folks. You just never knew what to expect. I did (stupidly) walk back to my apt alone after studying on campus at night quite a bit, but thank God nothing happened. The year before I started school there a girl was murdered (stabbed) on the campus by some mental weirdo. It was horrible.

    To the OP, be aware of your surroundings, stay safe and look confident!!