Do you and SO NEVER EVER fight?

  1. I have talked to a very few girlfriends before that told me that they and their husband/boyfriend/fiance never fight...EVER!!

    I have a really hard time understanding or believing this, especially since I feel like I'm always arguing with my husband. We don't full on fight constantly but he really gets on my nerves sometimes and I have a hard time letting little things slide. He, on the other hand, never really criticizes me. Is it my fault we argue?

    Do any of you never fight? Why not? Can you give any advice on how this works? I've never even met a person I wasn't capable of arguing with even just a little bit. Is it you, or is it your SO, or is it your combination that makes it possible??? Please shed some light!
     
  2. oh hell yes we do! but there is an art to fighting which I would rather call arguing. takes years to learn how to argue respectfully and know when to give it a rest and come back when cooler heads can prevail.
     
  3. Me and DH don't fight very often, but we disagree about things because we often have different views on certain topics. We've been marriend 6 and 1/2 years and in that time, we've had maybe 4 or 5 bad drag-out fights. Not in a physical sense, (well except for the time I accidentally gave him a concussion...long story...:nuts:) but in those fights we both have said mean, hurtful things. We used words to beat each other up, but now we've resolved not to do that anymore because I think it always leaves a dent. Anyhow, I think there will always be arguments and disagreements, misunderstandings even...but you have to practice having those in a healthy way. =)
     
  4. Oh geez, I'd be thrilled if I could get our bickering to under 15 incidents a day, hehehe. We like to bicker.


    It's not healthy not to fight or to have a different opinion. To me that means that someone is constantly giving in or not having a voice of his/her own. If you're in relationship where you never ever ever ever have a difference of opinion, where you agree on every single little thing, what's the fun? It's too Stepford-y for me.
     
  5. SO is the original stoic personality, and tries immensely not to hurt anyone's feelings. Usually our fights consist of me screeching away and him listening. We do communicate well though. If he is unhappy with something, he'll tell me. He just says it nicely.
     
  6. I agree. It would freak me out and annoy me if someone was just along for the ride in the relationship. I need feedback and I need a difference of opinion. I think there is a healthy way to fight/argue. Learning to fight/argue/communicate is definitely a process. Some couples never figure it out while others simply sinc up right away.
     
  7. My hubby and I are the same way. We're very passionate--okay, I am very passionate and he doesn't let me get away with my bratty ways. He is a good balance for me that way.

    I am glad that I am with a man with whom I can express my thoughts to without any fear. I know that he'll love me no matter what wack-o opinion comes out of my mouth. That's what acceptance and trust is all about.
     
  8. Sometimes the bf and I fight over him not giving enough feedback, but we've never had to raise our voices...YET. Its still a new relationship though, so we'll see.
     
  9. ummm...how I wish I was one of the lucky ones who never fight with my DH. We seem to bicker ALOT but i guess it's normal and healthy. we dont get violent (except sometimes i will throw things) but he refuses to even think about laying a hand on me and so he calms me down. :-]]
     
  10. We will be married eight years this October, will have been together for ten years later this month, and we never fight. Heck, we rarely disagree. I feel so fortunate to have found someone who is easy going and not judgmental. I listened to enough fighting between my parents when I was growing up. Now I like my peace and quiet.
     
  11. My SO and I don't fight..we argue about lil things..which at the end we always laugh about and or compromise.
     
  12. same here, we really don't have anything to fight about. But it's normal to sometimes get annoyed w/ your SO....maybe your girlfriends mean they never have HUGE full-on fights?
     
  13. My husband and I don't really fight, married 14 years.

    We ONLY fight about his family (6 sisters).
     
  14. LOL... SO & I don't "fight-fight" ...

    (Gah...OT: who was the comic that did that routine about how girls repeat words/phrases like that? I don't like you like you... i just like you." :roflmfao:)

    But we do get snippy on occasion:boxing:... we're both pretty mellow, so once he apologizes & I forgive, we're pretty much done. See my thread on this here.

    Ground rules.... no swearing, no name calling, no raised voices.... civility reigns supreme.... :angel:
     
  15. I like how Junkenpo referred to it - Ground rules seem key.