Catching the engagement bug...

#16
Forgot to mention...he joked about marriage after we had been together for a few months...which had me thinking about it:rolleyes: ...which caused me to joke back....which probably had him thinking about it more. We were together about four years before getting engaged. We were engaged for a year and we've been married for six years. He still jokes about things that he wants to do before he does them.:rolleyes: :lol:
 
#17
I love being married! We'll celebrate our third wedding anniversary in a few months. :love:

I got married pretty young. Met my husband when I was 21 & he was 28, got engaged at 22, then married when I was 23 & he was 31. We both knew early on that we wanted to get married, so getting married 2 years after we started dating worked for us. To answer your question, yes, I think it's normal to reach a point in your life, whether in a relationship or not, where you start having a strong desire to get engaged/married.

You think that desire is bad? Wait til after you get married and the BABY bug hits you! I was in the same boat before getting married. "I don't know if I want kids, and if I do, I don't want them for at least 5 more years" summed up the way I felt. It's weird how quickly that changed for me (and for most of my friends who are married). Granted, we are waiting 2 more years, so it really will be 5 years after marriage before we have a baby, but the baby bug hit me like a ton of bricks (much to my shock) just a few months after being married.

Long story short, I think you're at a fine age to get engaged. Getting married around 25/26 years old to somebody you've dated for years isn't unreasonable. My strongest recommendation is that people live on their own for awhile before getting married. Running your own household takes discipline and effort. I know that people do it, but for me, personally, I couldn't imagine going straight from my parents' house into a place with my husband. I matured a lot in the years where I lived on my own and supported myself with my own job and income. Good luck!
 
#18
I'm going to chime in here because I met my husband when I was older. I was 31 and he was 33. Although he knew early on that he wanted to be with me forever, I was a bit unsure at first! But then that changed and it was mutual. But being an old-fashioned girl, I wanted to get married and he would have been happy just living together forever. Well, finally we resolved that and we got married in 2004 and we LOVE being married. It's a very settling, comforting feeling.

I have been quoted as saying that people should not get married until they are 30. The reason I say this is because you change so much in your 20s. If I had married any of my boyfriends in my 20s I definitely would be divorced! But the main point is that you both have to be on the same page, and being emotionally and financially stable is so important as well. For you two, it sounds as if those things are already in place. If you have similar goals in the future, then I'm sure you two will be very happy!

I also agree with the other post about not rushing the engagement. We were engaged for a year and a half before our wedding date. Also, we didn't set our date until a good six months after we got engaged (which drove my mother crazy -- she actually asked me if he really wanted to marry me!). So keep a clear head, move forward and work together!
 
#19
I'm in the same boat as you. Me and my boyfriend have been together 5 years January 12 - and for awhile I was wishing for that moment, that on-one-knee moment - but now I'm just letting things flow. Right now I know my boyfriend doesn't have the type of money to buy the kind of ring he'd like to buy me (and that I'd like to have, lol) - so it may be a few years more ;) Oh well, he's worth the wait. To me really, all marriage is is a piece of paper and a big dress. I don't feel any less married (we've been living together for 3 years) that anyone else. The only thing missing from our "marriage" is the legal status
 
#20
My bf and I have been together for over three years now and, hopefully, moving in together next year. He is 25 and I am 22. Even though I know he is not ready to get married, I asked him if he does see us go in that direction. We did talk about the ring and the religion thing (he's Catholic, I'm Christian) and where we would want the wedding to be. We did agree on having one kid when we're both in our 30s (I want to live a little before taking that kind of responsibility). I know it is not happening for a while (even though I SOOO want to be engaged to him!) because we both need to live together before really knowing if we're compatible with each other. But I certainly did catch the engagement ring bug already!

Christina, it does seem that both of you are ready and I think that he is just picking out the most perfect ring and trying to come up with the best proposal! And I am SO glad that you're very happy in your relationship!
 
#21
I'm wiht my BF for 6 years now. We had rocky moments but we both love each other very much. I've been waiting and it sucks that I do think that but I know he's not ready. I will be here, waiting. He's worth it to me and if it takes forever, I will wait for him (hehe, that reminded me of Futurama's episode about Fry and his dog where the song goes "If it takes forever, I will wait for you").
 
#22
My husband and I got married after dating for a year. We were both 26, and in January we will celebrate our 13th anniversary. We knew we were going to get married shortly after we started dating. We've been inseparable since day one. We bought a house after we dated for about 8 months (I didn't live there until we got married though). He made the engagement official with the one knee deal on Christmas Eve, and we got married three weeks later.

I don't think we rushed anything. We had both been out of college for 5 years and were becoming established in our careers. We had both dated plenty, and were were ready to get married. We have an awesome marriage, and we get closer with each year. I adore that boy!!!
 
#23
I am enjoying reading about everyone's different experiences. Thank you all for being so open and honest, and sharing :nuts:

Buttery - Yeah, I was kinda :wtf: when the whole setting and size thing was talked about. He sat next to me while I was on my laptop and I showed him a few nice examples. He seemed interested ;) Then I casually mentioned that we should look around when we do our holiday shopping. This was me, but not visibly ---> :party:

:P
 
#24
The BF and I have been together nearly seven years and living together for three and a half years. He's in school & about to leave the state to start his residency & I'm in school finishing my thesis & planning on going back for more school. We're just kind of comfortable with the way things are. I'm anti-rocking the boat. To be honest, my parents had probably the world's worst marriage, so I'm not a big fan of marriage in general. If it happens, it happens, if not, I'm fine with that too. I'm just happy having him in my life.:heart:
 
#25
How romantic, he really seems to care and want you in his life permanently. I say, just go with your feelings and enjoy each other. Being married for me has brought so many wonderful things in my life besides a wonderful husband.:love:
 
#27
I'm new here and thought I'd chime in. I will be dating my fiance (just got engaged on Oct 21) for 4 years coming on Dec 4. I am 24 and he is 23. We knew each other for about a year and a half before that. We started talking about marriage a little early, and knew that we eventually would be getting married. I suggest more than anything to not try to pressure him or keep asking when he will do it. The fact that he is thinking about ring settings is good and a step in the right direction. It's also a plus that he brought it up. Guys have their own timeline. 'Soon' to them may mean a year, rather to us could mean a couple weeks. When he's ready he will let you know!
 
#28
People and marriage are funny. As you may look at one person and think they are the type to just find the right person and settle down, and others you see as the type to date forever. I have found that the right time is different for everyone, regardless of how you may view them. My boyfriend-23-is a year younger than me-and is the one of the most committed guys I have ever met, and seems the type to want to get married shortly after he knows he has found the girl he wants to marry, but this isn't actually the case. We have talked about marriage/getting engaged, and we both want to, but I doubt anything will happen in the near future, as he isn't really ready for various reasons. Whereas a couple of his friends, that I would never expect to get married before their 30s, will be tying the knot within the next 6 months. Like I said people are funny, the most important thing is knowing that you have someone that loves you, and that they want to spend the rest of their life with you. It sounds like your bf will propose shortly, but until then continue enjoying the wonderful relationship that you have. :yes:
 
#29
I don't think you are too young! Its a great age and if you feel like you are ready for marriage ITS GREAT!!:love:
Its a great sign that he asked about what kind of ring you like, size, cut, etc!!:cutesy: I wish you all the best and I have caught the BUG, too! Its coming around!! :drinkup: I hope it happens soon and Happy Anniversary!
 
#30
Cristina, it sounds like he is planning something!! I just got engaged in July and it has been so amazing. I thought I loved my fiancee so so much, but after we got engaged, it was like everything was brand new all over again. It just took my feelings to a whole different level. We're both 28, and we had been together for about 4.5 years when we got engaged. We only talked about it a little bit, when he proposed I was extremely surprised . I had always said that eventually i wanted to get married. For the first few years, he said he didn't want to get maried at all. But the closer we got, the less we could see our lives without each other. If he wants to go look around the holidays, that's great. It's so special when they surprise you! Don't try to find out too much, and def. enjoy it when you do get engaged. B/c it's the most fun ever!!! I haven't been on here as much b/c I've been on the wedding forums! But after the wedding I'll be back here full time!
 
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