Broaching the topic of B-bag purchases w/hubby

  1. Hi! Someone else's thread about how they have to initially hide new Bbag purchases from their hubby so they can gradually ease it into circulation got me do all of you handle your hubbies about buying new Bbags? Do you consult with him before making the purchase, or do you buy-first-explain-later? :p

    DH and I have a joint account and he pays all of our bills, including credit cards, so there's almost no way I could slide it past him. So I pretty much need to consult with him before making a big purchase. Even though I work and I could cash out my paycheck instead of direct-depositing it, I'd feel a little dishonest for not at least running it by my DH. He's getting pretty sick of my handbag addiction and me hiding it from him would just add fuel to the fire. I've just preordered a Blue India and am brainstorming for good ways to bring up my new soon-to-be purchase. (Got any suggestions? I want to stay married!!!)

    What is your handbag/hubby situation? :smile:
  2. He likes all my colors (except for Magenta, which he hates) and besides, it's my money that I earned. But, I do tend to ease things in gradually--because I'm embarrassed at being such a handbag whore.
  3. I am a SAHM so I have to be a little creative with my handbag purchases. What I do is sell on eBay to make money and keep it in a seperate account (that hubby know about). If I purchase a new bag, I 9 times out of 10 sell an old one to help finance the purchase. I have a little debt that hubby does not know about but am being careful about not letting it get out of control.

    Needless to say, I rarely purchase new bags, instead buying on eBay.

    Good luck to you!!
  4. My dh hates my b-bags; he thinks they look cheap. :wtf: He does not understand my love for bags so I do the same; hide them and gradually ease them in as well.
  5. Lol - I hide them from my hubby! When they do eventually come out he thinks they cost $100. Any special occasions coming up (anniversary, birthday, etc?). I'm no help with advice, I'm in the same boat.
  6. Ha ha Cal, I like your signature!!
  7. I have explained by bag obsession to my husband and he is pretty understanding though I work full time and he knows he can't say anything really about how I spend my money. He actually thinks it is kind of cute as I broke my foot very badly in March and had to switch from shoe addiction to bags! He is an architect and to his credit he likes the depth of the color of my ink city.
  8. he wasn't realised it's an expensive bag, but he liked the style and the smell, so i let him to like my bag first, and gradually telling him what's great about this bag.
    and yeah, i still hide 1 b-bag though :p
    i'm going to let it out once my bags on eBay sells :girlsigh:
  9. I wait until he messes up or buys something expensive for himself - then it's take no prisoners! :p haha. j/k (sort of)

    Most of the time, I'll just wear down his patience by talking about how much I love a bag and how it will be my everyday bag and I won't buy another bag for the rest of the month/year/life :wtf: .

    Another good way to broach the subject is wait until you get paid (or he gets paid). :yahoo: My DH is the guardian of our finances too, so it makes him feel better to see an injection before a withdrawal. :idea:

    I just bought a grenat city and the cc bill hasn't updated to show it yet. He knows that I really wanted it, but doesn't know that I already took the plunge. :upsidedown:
  10. i'm also a stay at home mother and since most of my shopping now is via the internet i tell my DH that my purchases are good deals. i did tell him when i purchased my last 2 bags from brownsfashion so he knows that the brand is balenciaga, but i didn't tell him the prices. i don't hide them cause i want to use them when we go out together too. he shakes his head when i tell him, but he knows about my love for bags since before we got married. now i do limit myself to 1bag/season though...esp. cause nowadays i go out with only a diaper bag.
  12. Thanks for all the responses. :smile: I work almost full-time (4 days a week) but the philosophy in our family is that our combined earnings go into one pot for our family of 4....otherwise I'd totally sock away a paycheck to pay for a new bag. But if I did that behind DH's back, the guilt of "taking away from my family" would totally overwhelm me! And DH makes way more money than me so I wouldn't feel "right" about just taking from that account for a self-indulgent purchase without his blessing!

    Luckybunny -- my DH is the same way. He has always said that I'd have to wait until year-end to make any big purchases since that's when he gets his bonus. But WAITING until December for my Blue-India would totally kill me!

    Our 5th anniversary is coming up so I guess I could ask for it as a gift and he'd probably be OK with that, but actually (and I'm being SO selfish here) I'd rather have him give me a piece of nice jewelry for our anniversary. :blush: That's why I'm angling for a way to get him to say YES to my Blue India as a just-because purchase!

    (In the past 8 months I've bought 3 bags over $1200 each...he's worried that I will continue this pattern. I'm so awful.)
  13. Kristy,
    I don't think you should hide it. You'll feel guilty, and if he finds out, he might feel like you were being secretive. When I started building my bag wardrobe, my husband was concerned about some of the price tags. Understandably so, imo, these bags are not cheap. So, I told him about all of my purchases, etc. I told him about selling on Ebay to fund other purchases. I also asked him advice about the listing, and to look at the photos, etc. I asked for his opinions on everything, and he finally just said, "do whatever you want, hon, I don't really care about purses".

    I work full-time, but my hubby makes more than me. I handle all money matters, and do more around the house and with the kids. It all evens out. I think you should be upfront, and if he has a reasonable objection, you should hear him out. jmo. Good luck!

    ***I wanted to add that I think it would be impossible to continue the pattern indefinately. Sooner or later, enough is enough.
  14. Tln, it would *never* occur to me to hide a big purchase from him. I started this thread because I'm looking for ways to broach the topic for buying my 2nd Bbag without sending him running for the hills! And I was wondering how other people handle their hubbies with regard to their Bbag obssession! :smile: Apparently some hide them, others just buy and hope that hubbies won't notice, and others sell one in order to buy another. Everyone has a different approach.

    I agree, at some point enough will be enough. I just got into Bbags this year (I have 1 Bbag so far) and am feeling the itch to own at least one more. I really want a blue bag so after the Blue India, I should be "done." I hope!
  15. I'm lucky because DH let me almost buy any bag I want within reason. I always tell him before I buy one to check finances because he's the one who's handling them. We do have one account so there wouldn't be a way to buy something without him knowing. I'd feel like a liar in not telling him when I bought something.
    When I went to Theresa last Monday I didn't have any intention to buy a grenat city I just wanted to check them out again.:angel: But than I couldn't resist when I saw the perfect city for me so I bought her with such a bad conscience that I actually couldn't enjoy her because DH didn't know about it.:sad: After thinking and thinking how to tell him I made up my mind to sell one of my other bags which hasn't seen the light of day and after that decision I felt much better. :yahoo: Funny thing was when DH came home from work that he asked immediately: "Hun, show me your new B-bag, I want to see the colour IRL."
    My jaw just dropped open and I asked how could he know about it without me telling.:wtf:
    He just laughed and said:" We're married for almost 11 years now and when you told me you're going to look at the new shipment I knew that you'd come home with one"
    So I worried the whole afternoon about nothing:yes: