At my wit's end..plz help me

  1. As some of you may know, I recently delivered a wonderful baby boy about a month ago. My issue is this: he NEVER likes to be put down. He constantly needs to be held which makes it hard to get anything done during the day...like eating!

    I've tried numerous swings, bouncers, vibrating chairs, slings, carriers and he won't have anything to do with ANY of them. I've been crying just about every day because I just wonder if I'll ever be able to do anything besides hold him. Don't get me wrong. I love my son and love the moments I have holding his little body but I feel so trapped not being able to do anything else like at least make something quick to eat. I need to eat to keep up my milk supply but he's not letting me. It's a perpetual cycle.

    So is my only recourse just to stick it out and hope he grows out of this?:s

    He'll sleep at night in his crib but when it's time to wake up, it's back in my arms he wants to be and I just am up in arms about this. Plz help or give any suggestions..I just don't know what to do anymore. :crybaby:
     
  2. Oh honey! Those first couple of months are just brutal aren't they!?
    Do you ever nurse him laying down? That was the only way I could sneak away from one of my babies for the first couple of months.
    I'd nurse him to sleep, pull off and back slowly out of bed!
     
  3. I have nursed laying down..doesn't seem to help either. He's up in a matter of 15 min's or so..not sure what's going on.
     
  4. How does he fall asleep in the night? on his own ?
     
  5. Which sling was it that you have tried? A Bjorn?

    I am wondering if a different sling would help him since there are ones you could try that would give him the sensation of being held. A pouch might do the trick. Just make sure you order the right size!

    Is he giving good burps after feedings? Maybe he has a small bout of gas after feedings which is making him uncomfy and wanting to be held upright. Sometimes it could take a good half an hour to get one burp out of my son, but it was worth it because he slept so much better.

    Have you considered Gripe Water?
     
  6. Ohhhh, I have so been there! I'm so sorry, you must be exhausted. When ds was little he cried constantly for 3 months and I thought I was going to go nuts:sad:. Maybe try getting him used to a carrier...keep putting him in there until he gets used to it. Also, have someone hold him while you sleep. I had my dh take over whenever possible(which was not often enough because he worked all the time) and just sleep as much as you can. My mistake was not being able to rest when someone finally did hold the baby for me...I would want to try and do all the cleaning, check out the computer...anything and I was just exhausting myself further. Another thing, try and rub his tummy and burp him. Take your time burping him after he eats and then try and put him down. I always rushed this step and looking back, I can see that he was probably crying because he was uncomfortable. Hang in there, I know it's so hard and it feels never ending...but end it does and belive it or not you may miss those days (or not;)). Take care of yourself and try and sleep when you can. Feel free to pm'me anytime too.
     
  7. Maybe he has gerd or lactose intolerance etc.. that is causing him pain? usually babies with these conditions like to be held.
    Some babies/children are just higher maintenance. My daughter falls into this catagory.

    Crying it out is always an option. I was so against it in my daughters early months but I got sick of sleepless nights, not being able to shower, clean whatever. I'll tell you what it was the best thing I ever did.
     
  8. I am not so much opposed to CIO {crying it out} but I think a baby under 6 months is too young for CIO. I don't think they'll get the logic of it, it'll feel more like abandonment this young, JMO.
    Is he colicy at all?
    One of my boys was and I thought it'd kill me.
    Oddly enough, 3.5 yrs later, my colicky boy is the family angel. He's sweet, affectionate and sort of quiet. He's a dream boat!:love:
     
  9. Yeah everyone feels different about it. For me a little crying is no biggie. If baby is fed, dry, not too hot or cold, no medical issues etc.. then he/she will be fine with not being picked up as soon as they start crying.
     
  10. [quote=rudegal Which sling was it that you have tried? A Bjorn?

    I am wondering if a different sling would help him since there are ones you could try that would give him the sensation of being held. A pouch might do the trick. Just make sure you order the right size!




    My daughter was really on & off with the Bjorn. If I ever have another child I'm going to try a mei tei, hotsling, one of those pouch/slings.
     
  11. Right now I'm nursing him to sleep..when he's really tired and wakes up sometimes he'll go back to sleep on his own.
     
  12. Eh, he'll burp every other feeding it seems. He's not consistent with it. I've tried getting up with him after nursing and walking w/ him so he's upright and that doesn't even seem to do the trick either.

    Regarding the pouch, I have three different kindsand the longest he'll last is 3 min's..yep, I timed it. He doesn't like the Bjorn and I just bought a hotslings. I also have sidecar designs carrier and a mei tei. I'm about reading to pull my hair out. And I've heard of Gripe Water but what is it?? Where can I get it?
     
  13. Thx guys for the suggestions...to respond to some questions:

    The problem about burping him when I feed him is that he completely wakes up and seems like the only way to get him back to sleep is to nurse him again. See the cycle? Wondering how to overcome that?????

    Also, I called my pediatrician's office today. He's going to be seen tomorrow. He literally has slept a total of about 2 hours since 3am. I have nooooo idea what's going on w/ him and it's freaking me out and mentally taxing on me. He hasn't stopped crying at all and he's dry, just ate and been burped. His stomach is not distended...I am literally crying when typing this as my mother tries to soothe him.
     
  14. I know this sounds strange but I put my fussy baby in her carrier and put it on top of the dryer. Someone suggested it to me and it worked. I also had to put her in the car and drive around for a while. She would not sleep in her crib at all but in her carrier. I would let her sleep there for my sanity. Sorry, I know what your going through. Maybe Grandma can help or friend give you little break...
     
  15. Hon, is he colicky?
    The thing is, babies NEED that almost constant companionship.
    By CIO I am not referring to finishing something before picking him because he's crying. I mean letting a baby cry for an hour to teach him a lesson.
    KWIM?
    He's just SOOO young still.
    Trust me, I have twins, that means 2 5week olds at one time that both wanted to be held constantly, I get it:yes: LOL!
    There were times when I had to lay them down in their cribs safely and close the door and walk outside for a moment to hear something besides constant crying.
    He's noraml, sure some babies are "angel" babies and don't need constant holding, but MOST of them do for the first month or so.
    12 weeks is literally the magic age for some reason for most babies . . . that book I recommended also points this out.
    I PROMISE, this gets better:yes:

    My favorite phrase was, crying never killed anyone ;)
    It may be difficult for a MOm to listen to, but it won't harm the baby.

    Hang in there!