A Sexual Health Question: Not for the reserved or shy! Spicing things up...

  1. Hi ladies,

    So, I'm at my boyfriends right now (just dropped the kiddo off to my grandma since her parents aren't home) and when I walked into his bedroom, there was a present on the bed for me.

    So of course, I get all excited thinking that it would be the pair of heels that I saw at Breuninger yesterday...So I rip off the wrapping paper and I see a box. With a naked lady on it...holding a Rabbit vibrator. :shame:

    Bart had talked to me about spicing up our bedroom activities before that we broke up (we've been back together now for a bit), but never got around to it. Now, I have no problem with owning a Rabbit, Vibrator, or any other type of sex toy. The thing that somewhat worries me is how this will affect our sex life. I've heard of women becoming dependent on these types of things to achieve orgasm and that they're no longer able to achieve orgasm with their partners. I don't think that will happen in my case, but I kind of worry about how this will play a role (if any) if we use it occasionally...Will he become jealous of it, even though he was the one who took the first step and bought that thing? Any opinions and advice would be appreciated.

    ...If you don't want to post in here, you can also PM me if you've got something to say. I understand that this is a very private subject, and when I called my best girlfriend she didn't give me much of any advice!

    ...Also, I thought it was most appropriate to post here, rather than the General forum, since this forum has more to do with health :smile:
  2. It's rather like all good things in life: moderation is the key, but variety is the spice of life. ;)

    To try to keep this clinical and not get the thread deleted, there has been an old wives tale since the beginning of time that "self-stimulation" could lead to the sort of concerns you mention. Its mostly not true.

    However if you feel the urge to kick the BF out of the bed and give the new toy a pillow instead, then you could have some problems!
  3. Good to know that it's mostly not true. I don't know too much about this whole subject, haha. I've lead a fairly sheltered life, and watching Sex and the City opened me up to new things that I didn't even know existed!
  4. Sometimes women who use a vibrator frequently find it more difficult to orgasm from other stimulation, because they get so used to "getting off" that one way. However, it doesn't become impossible. Using the vibrator with your partner should be fun, so enjoy. I don't think your boyfriend would have bought you one if he was the type to get jealous of a piece of motorized rubber.
  5. Self-stimulation alone won't kill your ability to reach orgasm with your partner, but becoming accustomed to very strong stimulation can dull your reaction to more subtle contact. Use your new toy when you want to incorporate it into your lovemaking, but start slow and gentle and don't let it run the show. Also, don't feel obligated to always bring it out, surely that could get a little boring, no?
  6. Thank you everyone :smile: I'm sure he just bought it to keep things spicy and to use it on occassion. Also, he's gone a lot on business - so I think it had a lot to do with that too, haha. Again, thanks for your responses. Like I said to Prada Psycho, I don't know too much about this stuff - and SATC opened my eyes to a whole new world, lol
  7. The rabbit...my oh my...well atleast he got a great choice!!! My friends and I used to shop together every Saturday for years...(I have moved, I miss them!! :sad: But when we first heard about the rabbit (sex and the city) we all went out and bought one....its was a FUNNY day! Our normal 8 hour shopping day was only 2 hours long as everyone wanted to get home to try the rabbit out!! IT was really amazing... A fun diversion. 3 of the 4 of us were single at the time. Im married now.....like someone else stated...moderation....is key. You might fall in love with this thing!!! have fun!
  8. haha, that's too funny :smile: I just keep thinking of Charlotte when she rushed home and canceled dates with the girls because of her Rabbit, lol. Thank you!
  9. *Cal's googling the rabbit as she has no idea what it is*
  10. Oh, sorry Cal! I thought the Rabbit was something pretty much everybody had heard of! If you google it, the first link should be from the Babeland website, there's a picture that shows what it is :smile:
  11. My sister swears by hers and she and her husband have used it for years to spice things up a little. Just don't do what she did- they stayed in an elderly couple's camper in Texas for a week while on vacation and accidently forgot the vibrator under the pillow on the bed. Most embarrassing thing she has ever had to deal with.:lol:
  12. OMGosh!! I don't even know how I would deal with something like that, hahah! I would probably die from embarassment :smile:
  13. that would totally be embarassing. haha. i'd prolly just pretend nothing happened and go replace it and say it wasnt mine even though it was clearly mine. lol.

    ive never used the rabbit but it sounded pretty damn good on 'sex in the city' and im sure nothing bad will come from it if you and your boyfriend use it to spice things up once in a while, but dont let him choose to use it every time you have sex, and dont let you choose to use it every time, either.
  14. like all things in life, the key is for moderation. i haven't heard of any serious health related stories with this, but as long as you dont rely on it you should be set.
  15. I own a Rabbit. I didn't first hear about the Rabbit on SATC. I already knew what it was, but I only just recently got around to buying one. I can honestly say it was the best $50 I ever spent! :graucho: Your boyfriend made an awesome choice.