50 Reasons It's Great To Be A Woman

    1. Fat days can be compensated for with a Wonderbra, a pair of magic knickers and a good blow-dry.
    2. After a tough day at work, it's our prerogative to spend two hours in the bath, hidden in pomegranate fragranced foam.
    3. Our higher body-fat ratio means we get tipsy quicker and more cheaply - saving extra cash for Topshop splurges.
    4. We don't have to do the asking out (but we can if we want to)
    5. We can indulge in marathon back-to-back sessions of Brothers & Sisters, Ugly Betty and The X Factor and not get laughed at by our friends.
    6. We never have to worry about catching anything important in the zip of our jeans.
    7. We're first off any sinking ship. (Could be very useful one day.)
    8. Unlike men, who become aroused seven times a day, we don't get uncomfortable impromptu erections during sales meetings.
    9. We can guilt-trip men into giving us their seats on public transport.
    10. To us, the Gillette adverts are hilarious rather than the Holy Grail of manhood.
    11. Half of us own more than 30 pairs of shoes - that's one gorgeously glamorous pair for every day of the month.
    12. Our pride isn't damaged for life if we're unable to put up shelves or rewire a plug.
    13. Multiple orgasms. (Need we say more?)
    14. We're happy to ask for directions rather than drive five times around a one-way system muttering, "I know exactly where we are . . ."
    15. If we haven't shaved, we can wear trousers to cover the evidence.
    16. British women live almost five years longer than men. So next time he complains about how long you spend in the bathroom, tell him you've got time to burn.
    17. We can happily scream all the way through horror films without being labelled a wimp.
    18. Our hungover skin can be disguised with light-reflecting beauty products and a quick swipe of blusher.
    19. When we wear our man's clothes, we look elfin and cool. If he nicks our clothes, he looks like something out of Little Britain.
    20. We know exactly why a spritz of lynx is nothing like an adequate replacement for a decent chat-up technique.
    21. Two words: Johnny Depp.
    22. Thank God for PMS. We can throw a total wobbly about him watching too much football and then legitimately blame it on our fluctuating hormones.
    23. We're far less likely to get excessive nostril hair . . .
    24. . . . or go bald . . . or have hair growing out of our ears!
    25. Research proves that we are happier, more cheerful and more satisfied than men at work - and it's not just down to a daily sighting of the ultra-cute postboy.
     

    • 26. The average woman spends £8,000 on 111 handbags in her
      lifetime. Who needs a monster flat-screen TV when you've got the latest it bag
      swinging from your arm?
      27. We're better drivers: fact. Women are far less likely to drive like
      maniacs, cause big crashes or soup-up their cars with ridiculous neon
      light strips. And when we pay less for car insurance as a result.
      28. We're better at communicating our feelings and so develop much deeper
      relationships with our friends. (We knew those revelatory chats over
      revelatory bottles of wine were doing us good!)
      29. We're pickier about who we sleep with. Men have nearly 50% more
      sexual partners than us - giving them a 50% better chance of waking
      up with, "Oh my God, who is that?" syndrome the following morning.
      30. We can pee and actually get it in the toilet bowl (without anyone
      standing next to us making genital size comparisons).
      31. Shepherd's pie, chocolate and a vat of Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia really
      can make our world look rosier. So simple, so effective.
      32. There are three times as many men in jail as women. Which means
      we're either too sensible to commit the crime or too clever to get
      caught.
      33. We cry four times more than men and feel better for it. Who wants to
      keep all that stress and emotion pent up when you can blub it out at
      the plight of James McAvoy in Atonement?
      34. The Rampant Rabbit Wave - arguably, it's the greatest invention since
      the wheel. There's no male equivalent.
      35. We're capable of doing two or more things at once - and doing them
      bloody well. Women's brains are better at handling information from both
      the left and right sides, while men can only concentrate on one thing
      at a time, the poor lambs.
      36. We can go to the loo in groups without looking suspicious.
      37. We're less likely to die of heart disease or cancer. And less likely to get
      athlete's foot, too.
      38. We can order pina candles with the full sparkler/paper umbrella shebang
      and not get called Del Boy.
      39. Men like to think they're hard, but we have a higher pain threshold
      (childbirth, anyone?). Try asking him to push a mango out of his nostril.
      40. We're actually born to shop. Our evolutionary need to gather fruit and
      seeds for our families has left us with the exact skills to remember
      exactly where we saw that satin tulip skirt, how much it cost and how
      many were left on the rack.
      41. Thanks to the magic of high heels, there's no such thing as a short
      woman complex.
      42. We can talk to people of the opposite sex without imagining them stark
      naked.
      43. We make the best bosses. Firms owned by women are growing twice as
      fast and female entrepreneurs are rapidly outnumbering males. Sir Alan
      Sugar, you've been warned . . .
      44. Unlike the one man in seven who earns less than his partner, we don't
      feel threatened if our other half gets a bigger salary than we do.
      45. Flagging down a taxi is far easier for us. Just work that damsel-in-
      distress look . . .
      46. There's a seemingly endless supply of cute new male actors and Calvin
      Klein models to lust over.
      47. We manage to look more like Shakira than David Beckham when we
      dance.
      48. We're always right (even when we know we're not!)
      49. Women are cleverer than men - and research shows we stay quicker and
      sharper into old age. That'll come in handy down the bingo hall.
      50. We know with certainty whether size really does matter . . .

    (Cosmopolitan UK Edition)
     
  1. LMAO..great post once again, Caitlin! :biggrin:
     
  2. Lmao! What a great thread to wake-up to, thanks for posting it Caitlin :tup:
     
  3. very funny, thanks for posting!
     
  4. Funny & cute! Thanks for posting!
     
  5. Very nice listing. I wish the US Cosmo was as interesting as this... I just don't like that magazine anymore. I feel like it is written for a 16-20 yr old audience.
     
  6. :goodpost::ty:
     
  7. :feminist:
     
  8. Too cute!!! And true!
     
  9. Love it! Especially #40! :tup:
     
  10. :roflmfao:
     
  11. Haha, very funny!! :roflmfao: Thanks for sharing!
     
  12. Nice!! Thanks for posting.
     
  13. HILARIOUS! I love it!!!