[lilackatz]

My husband and I have been invited to an Indian wedding which takes place over two days,this a great honour. I'm now panicking coz wonder if I need two outfits? The trouble is I never wear them again as I live in jeans. I have a smart off white trouser suit which I thought would be ok but if I need somthing for the next day will have to go shopping.What do you girls think??

[pseub]

Are they doing ceremonies one day in Western dress and one day in traditional Indian dress? If so, you might be able to wear the suit both days, just grab a colorful cotton shawl to drape on the Indian dress day.

[anmldr1]

being an indian...i know people will be very dressed for the wedding...do you know what is the first night?? i would wear a dress if i were you on the second...all the women will be in their very embroidered saris for the wedding

[lilackatz]

I think we start at 8 am on the first day. it says "Departure of Barat " but don't know who that is ,It's not the bride or groom. To go to Guru Nanak Gurdwara for the ceremony I think. Then there is a reception at 2.00pm.The next day there is another ceremony in another town at 2.00pm. I really don't understand any of this and don't want to do the wrong thing and offend anyone. I know I have to cover my head and have a pashmina to use.Should I not be wearing a trouser suit?? Pleeeze help.

[cherry pie]

indian weddings are very dressy. if you feel more comfortable in trousers go with that but pick a nice bright top, something with pattern or embroidery will be good. maybe have a definite out fit for the first day an outfit for the second and something showyer as a stanby. and plenty of jewellery.
i went to a BIG indian wedding just after christmas nd the women were all in bright embroidered saris, and very expensive ones at that, with lots of jewellery

[ShimmaPuff]

This might be a good opportunity for you to discover the salwar kameez.

If you have ever dreamed of ultra-elegant and breathtakingly beautiful special occasion clothes that are actually comfortable, your delight will know no bounds!

Just a note about white - in the east, it is often considered the color of mourning, so maybe do western dress for one of the days, and your salwar kameez for the other, although once you get that first salwar kameez on your body, you are probably going to want two. O three. Or twelve... :)

[KDB]

hi lilackatz
I am Indian and of course have been to many, many Indian weddings including my own!!
The barat is not a person. It is a procession of the family and friends leading the couple or groom to the wedding. People dance, there is music and it is lots of fun. The gurdwara is the the temple where the wedding will take place. Then the reception follows at 2pm.
I think you will be fine in your suit for one day. I think it is a great idea to buy a colorful top or pashmina to wear with it.
Do you know what the other occasion is? Maybe you could wear your suit the second day.
Do you have access to any Indian shops? Kurtis (tunic tops) are also in style and look nice worn with pants.

[exquisite09]

* make sure to bring something to cover your hair for when you're at the gurdwara!

[lilackatz]

Originally Posted by KDB

hi lilackatz
I am Indian and of course have been to many, many Indian weddings including my own!!
The barat is not a person. It is a procession of the family and friends leading the couple or groom to the wedding. People dance, there is music and it is lots of fun. The gurdwara is the the temple where the wedding will take place. Then the reception follows at 2pm.
I think you will be fine in your suit for one day. I think it is a great idea to buy a colorful top or pashmina to wear with it.
Do you know what the other occasion is? Maybe you could wear your suit the second day.
Do you have access to any Indian shops? Kurtis (tunic tops) are also in style and look nice worn with pants.

Thanks so much for your help( that goes to all you girls).I did wonder about buying an Indian outfit but wondered if it was not the thing to do for me to wear one?It's not disrespectful is it? Are the tunics easy to get? They sound like a great idea.

[merika]

^^To wear a shalwar is a great idea! I agree with the not wearing white, or if you do wear a colorful shawl or top. The tunics should be easy to get - many big cities have stores that sell them.

I had a Western friend who borrowed a sari from someone and wore it at my wedding. She looked beautiful!

[lilackatz]

^^ My husband has just said I'll look ridiculous coz it won't look right on me but hey what does he know??
I'm going to try some Indian outfits on anyway and see.

[ShimmaPuff]

Originally Posted by lilackatz

^^ My husband has just said I'll look ridiculous coz it won't look right on me but hey what does he know??

Nothing. He knows nothing. This is a time for him to keep wallet open and mouth closed with the exception of effusive compliments.

Salwar kameez have centuries of history successfully making absolutely anybody who puts one on look fabulous. It is not likely that you will be the one to break this record.

I would highly suggest salwar kameez over sari, for one, salwar kameez is just more comfortable. Even if you get a very elaborate one, you will just feel like you are wearing embellished pajamas all day.

Two, sari takes some skill in terms of learning to put it on and work it.

Salwar kameez takes zero skill for either, you won't have to worry about your head, it will come with a beautiful long scarf called a dupatta, that goes perfectly with the outfit. When you need to cover your head, in the mosque or when presented to elders, just flip you up a chunk of dupatta and Poof!

The rest of the time you can wear it a squillion different ways. Easiest is just over one shoulder, one long end in front, one in back. Zero skill.

At the wedding, ask somebody and they will show you tricks for how to use it to work it and flirt with your husband.

And ask for an elastic in the salwar if you are unused to drawstring pants that have only a drawstring and no elastic. They will usually do this for you for $5 or so, or you can do it yourself, if you have skillz.

If you are used to wearing jeans, words cannot describe how delighted you will be with salwar kameez.

And yes, they are forgiving, you can eat lots, bloat up with PMS, even gain ten pounds, and no one will know, unless you get it made to be really tight, which sort of defeats the purpose and would not be a good idea anyway unless you know the wedding couples' parents are very liberal. Doesn't matter about the couple, the wedding, and everything and everybody in it, has to make their parents happy!

[KDB]

I have been to many Indian weddings where non-Indians wear something Indian and they look beautiful! Try them...you will enjoy it. Be sure to try some bangles and a bindi!

[lilackatz]

Thank you KDB and ShimmaPuff.I'm definitely going to look for a shalwar kameez and I love jewellery so it'll be great looking for that. I did have a shalwar kameez years ago but it was very plain. Can I go to a shop and find a really glamorous one ready made? I'm in the UK and don't have much time as the wedding is in 2 weeks.I haven't met the family. The father of the groom and the groom are both clients of my husbands and the father was a client of my husband's late father so think it is quite an honour to be invited.

[passerby]

lilackatz, I think you'll look wonderful in a shalwar kameez. I live in Singapore and go to "Little India" with my mum practically every weekend, main purpose is to buy pennywort in the wet market there . On the MRT (local equivalent of the Tube), I have seen ladies looking ever so lovely in their shalwar kameez.