Would you be mad?

Maryanne007 · Jun 11th, 2008, 05:29 PM

If your boyfriend didn't get you a gift for your 2 year anniversary? We exchanged gifts last year, and they were BIG gifts... but I get a feeling that there is nothing in store this year. I am feeling a little annoyed about it, as though he doesn't care (also we've been going through a rough patch these last few months, although things have gotten much better recently). I'm not 100% positive, but when I asked him if he wanted anything, he replied, for what? And this was RIGHT after we talked about where we should go for dinner to celebrate.

Its not the gift itself, it just seems like, he is being less thoughtful than he used to. And now I dont know what or if I should get him anything. Also, I gave him a smaller gift last week (just because) and he accepted it and just said thanks.

Any thoughts?

Jahpson · Jun 11th, 2008, 05:32 PM

did he even remeber the 2 year anniversary?

Maybe you should remind him, hopefully he will get the hint and at least give you a card and some flowers.

Maryanne007 · Jun 11th, 2008, 05:38 PM

he did remember, and we're going out to a nice dinner this weekend... but im just wondering if i am asking too much for the same kind of treatment as last year?? then again last year was quite extravagant...

also we only celebrate birthdays and anniversaries (with gifts that is), so if we didnt exchange now, it would seem.. i dont know? i dont want this to come off as materialistic, it just seems like a marked difference. at the same time, i dont know how i could even bring this up!?

nooch · Jun 11th, 2008, 05:42 PM

I would definitely be mad, but I'd save getting mad for AFTER the anniversary. For all you know, he's got a very well hidden surprise gift.

My fiance and I don't celebrate any holidays, just birthdays and anniversaries, so if he screwed up an anniversary I'd hit the roof. There are so few things that are important to me, you know?

But I'd definitely wait til the day of to get mad just in case he IS hiding something, then you'd feel like a jerk for getting mad

lovinalotofbags · Jun 11th, 2008, 05:42 PM

Well, he knows it is your anniversary b/c you are going out to dinner. Perhaps, he already got you something. Will just to have to wait and see.

Maryanne007 · Jun 11th, 2008, 05:45 PM

The thing is, I saw him last week (which was our actual anniversary), but only briefly cause he had to be out of town for work, so we decided to celebrate this week.... I know I am overanalyzing right now. Lol, ok, so I guess I will go ahead and try to find a present for him. Now what if I give it to him and he shows up with nothing?? That will be painful and awkward!

bagnshoofetish · Jun 11th, 2008, 05:47 PM

I have to ask you whats more important, your relationship going thru a rough patch and working on that or getting a gift to mark something that should be worth celebrating? He may have gotten you something but I would be more concerned with working on whats important and going to make the both of you happy for many anniversaries to come. KWIM?

Maryanne007 · Jun 11th, 2008, 05:49 PM

^^ I totally agree, I'm just wondering if it is a sign that things are not as good as I think. Perhaps thats silly? I dont know, its the underlying meaning that I am worried about.

bagnshoofetish · Jun 11th, 2008, 06:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Maryanne007

^^ I totally agree, I'm just wondering if it is a sign that things are not as good as I think. Perhaps thats silly? I dont know, its the underlying meaning that I am worried about.

anything is possible. go with your gut. I don't know the guy or how sentimental he is. some guys can love a woman to death and just not put a lot of stock in gifts like we do. if you are having problems, all the signs in the world won't tell you what you already know in your heart. talk to him. be gently honest. (ie; "I know it may sound a little materialistic but I like getting little gifts from you....so sue me!")

rubylola · Jun 11th, 2008, 06:29 PM

It wouldn't bother me at all.

I don't think my DH got me a gift for our first wedding anniversary (I got him one), which probably annoyed me slightly at the time, but in the grand scheme of things it isn't really a big deal.

My DH is generally lousy at gifts (and I knew this when I married him) so I just tell him what I want at birthdays and Christmas, which suits me better anyway- once, years ago, he gave me an external firewire hard drive for my birthday, and he was really excited about it, because he knew my computer was getting a bit full

.

Now we are married, every now and again he'll surprise me with a new piece of diamond jewelry (the one surprise thing he will buy me now) which is always a nice surprise.

But really, gift giving and romantic anniversaries are low on my list of what is important in a relationship- the day to day stuff is so much more important. If the two of you get on and are happy I wouldn't lose sleep over the anniversary stuff.

heart goes boOm · Jun 11th, 2008, 10:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rubylola

once, years ago, he gave me an external firewire hard drive for my birthday, and he was really excited about it, because he knew my computer was getting a bit full

.

hehe, i think that's so sweet! he was thinking!

boxermom · Jun 11th, 2008, 10:36 PM

I don't think guys are hardwired to celebrate significant dates like women are. Try not to make it a test that he passes or fails. Believe me, there will be years (if you stay together a long time) when a dinner out will be a big deal and there won't be any big gifts involved. It's more about the relationship.

Tammy518 · Jun 11th, 2008, 10:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by boxermom

I don't think guys are hardwired to celebrate significant dates like women are. Try not to make it a test that he passes or fails. Believe me, there will be years (if you stay together a long time) when a dinner out will be a big deal and there won't be any big gifts involved. It's more about the relationship.

Agreed. We just go out somewhere nice to eat (without the kids!) for our anniversaries, and really have never bought each other anniversary gifts.

dallas · Jun 11th, 2008, 10:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Maryanne007

he did remember, and we're going out to a nice dinner this weekend... but im just wondering if i am asking too much for the same kind of treatment as last year?? then again last year was quite extravagant...

Isn't that enough? If last year was extravagant, why can't this year be a little different? It sounds as if you using the anniversary gifts as some sort of relationship/happiness measure. If I were you, I would relax, put a big smile on my face and enjoy the dinner.

ChristyR143 · Jun 11th, 2008, 11:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rubylola

It wouldn't bother me at all.

I don't think my DH got me a gift for our first wedding anniversary (I got him one), which probably annoyed me slightly at the time, but in the grand scheme of things it isn't really a big deal.

My DH is generally lousy at gifts (and I knew this when I married him) so I just tell him what I want at birthdays and Christmas, which suits me better anyway- once, years ago, he gave me an external firewire hard drive for my birthday, and he was really excited about it, because he knew my computer was getting a bit full

.

Now we are married, every now and again he'll surprise me with a new piece of diamond jewelry (the one surprise thing he will buy me now) which is always a nice surprise.

But really, gift giving and romantic anniversaries are low on my list of what is important in a relationship- the day to day stuff is so much more important. If the two of you get on and are happy I wouldn't lose sleep over the anniversary stuff.

What she said!

I would personally blow this off if the relationship is good and this is the only thing you can think of that is a problem.

Jun 11th, 2008, 05:29 PM	#1
Maryanne007 Member	Would you be mad? If your boyfriend didn't get you a gift for your 2 year anniversary? We exchanged gifts last year, and they were BIG gifts... but I get a feeling that there is nothing in store this year. I am feeling a little annoyed about it, as though he doesn't care (also we've been going through a rough patch these last few months, although things have gotten much better recently). I'm not 100% positive, but when I asked him if he wanted anything, he replied, for what? And this was RIGHT after we talked about where we should go for dinner to celebrate. Its not the gift itself, it just seems like, he is being less thoughtful than he used to. And now I dont know what or if I should get him anything. Also, I gave him a smaller gift last week (just because) and he accepted it and just said thanks. Any thoughts?

Jun 11th, 2008, 05:32 PM	#2
Jahpson Member Location: The Playground	did he even remeber the 2 year anniversary? Maybe you should remind him, hopefully he will get the hint and at least give you a card and some flowers. __________________ Amazingly Sophisticated Happy Holidays to all my TPF friends!

Jun 11th, 2008, 05:42 PM	#4
nooch bubblehead Location: new mexico via BROOKLYN NY	I would definitely be mad, but I'd save getting mad for AFTER the anniversary. For all you know, he's got a very well hidden surprise gift. My fiance and I don't celebrate any holidays, just birthdays and anniversaries, so if he screwed up an anniversary I'd hit the roof. There are so few things that are important to me, you know? But I'd definitely wait til the day of to get mad just in case he IS hiding something, then you'd feel like a jerk for getting mad __________________ FAT AND FABULOUS! CHANGE THE WAY YOU THINK NOT THE WAY YOU LOOK! http://www.natreasures.com Authentic American Indian jewelry & crafts All orders ship free PM me for discount codes

Jun 11th, 2008, 05:42 PM	#5
lovinalotofbags In for the long haul Location: South Carolina	Well, he knows it is your anniversary b/c you are going out to dinner. Perhaps, he already got you something. Will just to have to wait and see. __________________ Always forgive your enemies. Nothing annoys them so much.

Jun 11th, 2008, 05:47 PM	#7
bagnshoofetish We Love Our Billy	I have to ask you whats more important, your relationship going thru a rough patch and working on that or getting a gift to mark something that should be worth celebrating? He may have gotten you something but I would be more concerned with working on whats important and going to make the both of you happy for many anniversaries to come. KWIM? __________________ Please help us: http://forum.purseblog.com/animalici...nt-392607.html

Jun 11th, 2008, 05:38 PM	#3
Maryanne007 Member	he did remember, and we're going out to a nice dinner this weekend... but im just wondering if i am asking too much for the same kind of treatment as last year?? then again last year was quite extravagant... also we only celebrate birthdays and anniversaries (with gifts that is), so if we didnt exchange now, it would seem.. i dont know? i dont want this to come off as materialistic, it just seems like a marked difference. at the same time, i dont know how i could even bring this up!?

Jun 11th, 2008, 05:45 PM	#6
Maryanne007 Member	The thing is, I saw him last week (which was our actual anniversary), but only briefly cause he had to be out of town for work, so we decided to celebrate this week.... I know I am overanalyzing right now. Lol, ok, so I guess I will go ahead and try to find a present for him. Now what if I give it to him and he shows up with nothing?? That will be painful and awkward!

Jun 11th, 2008, 05:49 PM	#8
Maryanne007 Member	^^ I totally agree, I'm just wondering if it is a sign that things are not as good as I think. Perhaps thats silly? I dont know, its the underlying meaning that I am worried about.

Jun 11th, 2008, 06:29 PM	#10
rubylola Member	It wouldn't bother me at all. I don't think my DH got me a gift for our first wedding anniversary (I got him one), which probably annoyed me slightly at the time, but in the grand scheme of things it isn't really a big deal. My DH is generally lousy at gifts (and I knew this when I married him) so I just tell him what I want at birthdays and Christmas, which suits me better anyway- once, years ago, he gave me an external firewire hard drive for my birthday, and he was really excited about it, because he knew my computer was getting a bit full . Now we are married, every now and again he'll surprise me with a new piece of diamond jewelry (the one surprise thing he will buy me now) which is always a nice surprise. But really, gift giving and romantic anniversaries are low on my list of what is important in a relationship- the day to day stuff is so much more important. If the two of you get on and are happy I wouldn't lose sleep over the anniversary stuff.

Jun 11th, 2008, 10:36 PM	#12
boxermom Member Location: North Carolina	I don't think guys are hardwired to celebrate significant dates like women are. Try not to make it a test that he passes or fails. Believe me, there will be years (if you stay together a long time) when a dinner out will be a big deal and there won't be any big gifts involved. It's more about the relationship.