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dearmissie · Aug 9th, 2009, 03:34 PM

Originally Posted by L4F4

Should or shouldn't is for each one to say. I'm not telling anyone what to do. For me, I wouldn't.

Well that wasn't specified in your OP that this opinion was just for you. It seemed like that opinion was your opinion on everyone if they had/have a long engagement. Just seemed that you believe if one isn't planning a wedding in the next few months, not to be engaged at all.

Originally Posted by L4F4

Either get married now (within a few months of the engagement) or don't get engage yet if you're not willing to get married in a few months.

L4F4 · Aug 10th, 2009, 01:03 PM

dearmissie: Is there a format to posting that I'm not following? What is it that I'm supposed to specify? We're sharing opinions. My post is my opinion. I don't understand what you're analyzing about my post when you say "It seemed like that opinion was your opinion on everyone if they had/have a long engagement. Just seemed that you believe if one isn't planning a wedding in the next few months, not to be engaged at all." So what? I'm entitled to my opinion and my beliefs, and you're entitled to yours. Am I telling you to explain your beliefs? No. I'm stating my beliefs, but you're trying to put me in a position where I have to explain myself or justify what I believe. Why? Please respect my opinion.

I don't understand why so many people around here continuously get personal and pick fights in these threads. We're adults here. The OP asked a question, for opinions and that's what the thread is about. To those who find it necessary to pick on those who disagree with them, please stop trying to make others feel bad for their beliefs.

dearmissie · Aug 10th, 2009, 01:53 PM

Originally Posted by L4F4

dearmissie: Is there a format to posting that I'm not following? What is it that I'm supposed to specify? We're sharing opinions. My post is my opinion. I don't understand what you're analyzing about my post when you say "It seemed like that opinion was your opinion on everyone if they had/have a long engagement. Just seemed that you believe if one isn't planning a wedding in the next few months, not to be engaged at all." So what? I'm entitled to my opinion and my beliefs, and you're entitled to yours. Am I telling you to explain your beliefs? No. I'm stating my beliefs, but you're trying to put me in a position where I have to explain myself or justify what I believe. Why? Please respect my opinion.

I don't understand why so many people around here continuously get personal and pick fights in these threads. We're adults here. The OP asked a question, for opinions and that's what the thread is about. To those who find it necessary to pick on those who disagree with them, please stop trying to make others feel bad for their beliefs.

I do respect your opinions, I was simply asking whether or not in your mind I don't deserve to be engaged because my wedding isn't in a few months. Then you said it's not up up to you to say what I should do, that only you can think what's right for you. So you wouldn't state what you thought of my long engagement, why afriad to hur my feelings?? Well too late darling you already did when you said people should get engage at all if they aren't goingto to get married in the few months.

There is no format to posting, but realize when posting your opinions generally you're going to get responses. This is a public forum which connects all sorts of people together. People with diffenent backgrounds and situations. And I'm not nit picking over what you said because I'm bored and want to fght, you got personal with your opinions and your beliefs so, so will I. Please tell me how I'm making you feel bad for your beliefs, because what you said in your post did hurt my feelings. Your post made me feel belittled like I'm not worthy enough or enitled enough to be happy and engaged just because my wedding isn't within the next few months. In no way did I disrespect your opinions or beliefs, if I did, feel free to show where I did.

L4F4 · Aug 10th, 2009, 02:26 PM

This was my statement concerning my general opinion about long engagements: "Either get married now (within a few months of the engagement) or don't get engage yet if you're not willing to get married in a few months."

How is that personally directed to you? Sorry but I don't see it. On one hand you feel hurt and on another you challenge me to tell you what I think about your engagement specifically. ("So you wouldn't state what you thought of my long engagement, why afriad to hur my feelings??") Why would you do that if my general opinion already offends you so?

This is making a mountain out of a molehill. I think the thread should go back to topic instead of back and forth bickering, which I don't like to do and think is unfair to other members.

Roo · Aug 10th, 2009, 02:32 PM

Different people have different opinions about this subject. Please be respectful of that and do not engage in petty arguing. If someone is annoying you, use the ignore feature.....

Thank you

Originally Posted by dearmissie

I do respect your opinions, I was simply asking whether or not in your mind I don't deserve to be engaged because my wedding isn't in a few months. Then you said it's not up up to you to say what I should do, that only you can think what's right for you. So you wouldn't state what you thought of my long engagement, why afriad to hur my feelings?? Well too late darling you already did when you said people should get engage at all if they aren't goingto to get married in the few months.

There is no format to posting, but realize when posting your opinions generally you're going to get responses. This is a public forum which connects all sorts of people together. People with diffenent backgrounds and situations. And I'm not nit picking over what you said because I'm bored and want to fght, you got personal with your opinions and your beliefs so, so will I. Please tell me how I'm making you feel bad for your beliefs, because what you said in your post did hurt my feelings. Your post made me feel belittled like I'm not worthy enough or enitled enough to be happy and engaged just because my wedding isn't within the next few months. In no way did I disrespect your opinions or beliefs, if I did, feel free to show where I did.

dearmissie · Aug 10th, 2009, 02:38 PM

Originally Posted by Roo

Different people have different opinions about this subject. Please be respectful of that and do not engage in petty arguing. If someone is annoying you, use the ignore feature.....

Thank you

Hi Roo!! I totally respect his/her opinions. But I felt offended by the way s/he worded the post so I spoke up. If a poster is allowed to post something which I felt belittled with, I feel I deserve to speak out for myself so people won't always be naive and realize everyones situations are different. I apolgize for hijacking and will not address the matter on this thread any longer!!

Roo · Aug 10th, 2009, 02:40 PM

Originally Posted by dearmissie

Hi Roo!! I totally respect his/her opinions. But I felt offended by the way s/he worded the post so I spoke up. If a poster is allowed to post something which I felt belittled with, I feel I deserve to speak out for myself so people won't always be naive and realize everyones situations are different. I apolgize for hijacking and will not address the matter on this thread any longer!!

If you are having a disagreement, it's best to take it to PM or use the ignore feature.

Not everyone is going to agree with you here, or share your values. Also just because someone's opinion or belief system is contrary to yours does not mean it's a personal attack, kwim?

Roo · Aug 10th, 2009, 02:53 PM

Originally Posted by dearmissie

Whoa, is it just me, but someone is deleting my posts?? I'm taking the time to write and stand up for myself but my posts keep disappearing.

Missie, it's time to move on.

Pursegrrl · Aug 10th, 2009, 02:55 PM

Gosh, I just say to each their own. What works for some is probably strange to others and vice versa.

Roo · Aug 10th, 2009, 02:59 PM

^^ Werd!!!

Roo · Aug 10th, 2009, 03:07 PM

Missie: your posts are being deleted because I have asked you politely, twice, to move on. Again, if you have an issue, please take it to PM, or use the ignore feature.

Megs · Aug 10th, 2009, 03:09 PM

Posts are deleted that continue to go off topic and continue to partake in personal conflict which is best suited for PM.

Everyone has different opinions - let them share them. If you don't like what someone is saying, then add them to your ignore list/feature.

Pursegrrl · Aug 10th, 2009, 03:09 PM

Originally Posted by Roo

^^ Werd!!!

You said it, sister. I do enjoy learning reading details about what everyone does or doesn't do or is waiting to do (financial stability, finishing school, relocating closer, other goals etc). More than one way to skin a cat, so to speak.

hmmm, maybe I need a better comparison than that, sorry.

NoSnowHere · Aug 10th, 2009, 06:55 PM

I don't understand this phenomenon. My dh and I dated, talked about marriage one day, and one day surprised me with a ring. How do u plan on being asked to be engaged? BTW, we were engaged for 13 months.

sarasmith3269 · Aug 10th, 2009, 08:04 PM

I think the idea is the same as "waiting/planning to get married", but just like a previous poster said, the wording seems off. its like saying, "in two years Im planning on getting a job offer at a law firm", what would seem to make more sense is for someone to say, "in two years I plan on working for a law firm".

Aug 10th, 2009, 01:03 PM	#47
L4F4 BITE ME Joined: Apr 2009 Posts: 464	dearmissie: Is there a format to posting that I'm not following? What is it that I'm supposed to specify? We're sharing opinions. My post is my opinion. I don't understand what you're analyzing about my post when you say "It seemed like that opinion was your opinion on everyone if they had/have a long engagement. Just seemed that you believe if one isn't planning a wedding in the next few months, not to be engaged at all." So what? I'm entitled to my opinion and my beliefs, and you're entitled to yours. Am I telling you to explain your beliefs? No. I'm stating my beliefs, but you're trying to put me in a position where I have to explain myself or justify what I believe. Why? Please respect my opinion. I don't understand why so many people around here continuously get personal and pick fights in these threads. We're adults here. The OP asked a question, for opinions and that's what the thread is about. To those who find it necessary to pick on those who disagree with them, please stop trying to make others feel bad for their beliefs.
L4F4 BITE ME Joined: Apr 2009 Posts: 464

Aug 10th, 2009, 02:26 PM	#49
L4F4 BITE ME Joined: Apr 2009 Posts: 464	This was my statement concerning my general opinion about long engagements: "Either get married now (within a few months of the engagement) or don't get engage yet if you're not willing to get married in a few months." How is that personally directed to you? Sorry but I don't see it. On one hand you feel hurt and on another you challenge me to tell you what I think about your engagement specifically. ("So you wouldn't state what you thought of my long engagement, why afriad to hur my feelings??") Why would you do that if my general opinion already offends you so? This is making a mountain out of a molehill. I think the thread should go back to topic instead of back and forth bickering, which I don't like to do and think is unfair to other members.
L4F4 BITE ME Joined: Apr 2009 Posts: 464

Aug 10th, 2009, 02:55 PM	#54
Pursegrrl Oh no she di-int!! Joined: Jun 2006 Location: Seattle Posts: 19,278	Gosh, I just say to each their own. What works for some is probably strange to others and vice versa.
	__________________ My Blog: five-nineteen.blogspot.com Tweet tweet: twitter.com/five19

Aug 10th, 2009, 02:59 PM	#55
Roo au courant Joined: Apr 2006 Location: Rue Roo Posts: 12,701	^^ Werd!!!
	__________________ When I started counting my blessings, my whole life turned around. --Willie Nelson

Aug 10th, 2009, 03:07 PM	#56
Roo au courant Joined: Apr 2006 Location: Rue Roo Posts: 12,701	Missie: your posts are being deleted because I have asked you politely, twice, to move on. Again, if you have an issue, please take it to PM, or use the ignore feature.
	__________________ When I started counting my blessings, my whole life turned around. --Willie Nelson

Aug 10th, 2009, 03:09 PM	#57
Megs Administrator Joined: Sep 2005 Posts: 26,835	Posts are deleted that continue to go off topic and continue to partake in personal conflict which is best suited for PM. Everyone has different opinions - let them share them. If you don't like what someone is saying, then add them to your ignore list/feature.
Megs Administrator Joined: Sep 2005 Posts: 26,835	__________________

Aug 10th, 2009, 06:55 PM	#59
NoSnowHere ~LV L♥ve~ Joined: Feb 2007 Location: Sunshine State Posts: 5,654	I don't understand this phenomenon. My dh and I dated, talked about marriage one day, and one day surprised me with a ring. How do u plan on being asked to be engaged? BTW, we were engaged for 13 months.
	Last edited by NoSnowHere; Aug 10th, 2009 at 07:01 PM.

Aug 10th, 2009, 08:04 PM	#60
sarasmith3269 OP Member Joined: Oct 2008 Posts: 684	I think the idea is the same as "waiting/planning to get married", but just like a previous poster said, the wording seems off. its like saying, "in two years Im planning on getting a job offer at a law firm", what would seem to make more sense is for someone to say, "in two years I plan on working for a law firm".
sarasmith3269 OP Member Joined: Oct 2008 Posts: 684

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