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pinkdiamond · Sep 11th, 2009, 05:22 PM

How do you know if a male friend likes you as more than just a friend?

LinaFelina · Sep 11th, 2009, 05:41 PM

Originally Posted by bearonica

Ok, thanks I think I understand then. Perhaps it's like if I happen to see a good-looking man pass by I'll think, "Wow, he's hot" - but that's it, and I'll go on about my business.

Is it also true that for a split second guys will wonder what said cute girl is like in bed (not that they would actually seek to pursue this in real life)?

That thought might cross my mind, but like Charles said, it's not a scenario I play out in my head. It's more like a light that goes on. If a girl is flirty toward me, there's this sort of awareness that's in my head. Not really a thought, but more of an instinct. It doesn't even need to be visual, it could happen over the phone if she has a nice voice and demeanor.

A female friend of mine once gave me this tip: If you need to stop someone and ask for directions or for the time or whatever, ask someone of the opposite sex - they'll be more helpful. I notice it works 99% of the time.

LinaFelina · Sep 11th, 2009, 06:05 PM

Originally Posted by pinkdiamond

How do you know if a male friend likes you as more than just a friend?

If you've casually mentioned something to him that you really liked and he later gave it to you as a gift, he probably likes you more than a friend.

If he acts a bit more "alpha male" for no reason when there are other guys around you, he probably likes you more than a friend.

You could try complimenting him on how he looks and watch his body language. Start with a small compliment, "I like your shirt" or get a little more personal if that doesn't work like, "did you do something different today, you look great today".

I mentioned this somewhere in here, but if all else fails, ask him to give you a shoulder massage. (assuming you hope he likes you as more than a friend), it might give him a little hint.

pinkdiamond · Sep 11th, 2009, 06:13 PM

I am not going to try the shoulder massage as i am a total shyness failure when it comes to flirting.

I just wonder if you are not a flirt, how do you know?! I guess i am more of your girl next door type. It's hard to be shy, i don't want to say any of the above because it would be completely out of character for me KWIM? I am not in anyway cold, i am very caring and gentle and talkative, just not a good flirt.

LinaFelina · Sep 12th, 2009, 01:27 PM

Hmm, I think I need to know more. What do the two of you do as friends? How long have you been friends? Has he given you any specific indication that he is NOT interested in being more than friends? Does he ever talk to you about personal things?

pinkdiamond · Sep 12th, 2009, 03:45 PM

linafelina, can i pm you with my question?

sophiae · Sep 12th, 2009, 04:18 PM

What is it with guys loving it when two girls make out?! LOL No guy I've asked has ever been able to give me a clear answer!

Also, can a guy change his mind about a girl "friend" and like her as more of a "girlfriend" type?

I've always wondered these two things, because, heck! I don't think it's hot when two guys kiss, but that's just me. I know girls often change their minds about how they see their guy friends, since it's happened to me in the past.

Charles · Sep 12th, 2009, 04:26 PM

Men like girls, men like 2 girls...2 girls doing something "taboo" while letting us watch....what's not to love?

Second question...typically, no. It also depends on if there was an attraction to begin with. If he's really just a friend, he's just a friend for a reason.

sophiae · Sep 12th, 2009, 04:33 PM

Originally Posted by Charles

Men like girls, men like 2 girls...2 girls doing something "taboo" while letting us watch....what's not to love?

Second question...typically, no. It also depends on if there was an attraction to begin with. If he's really just a friend, he's just a friend for a reason.

LOL Thanks for the clarification on that first question. I think that's the most clear answer I've ever gotten from a guy. I have always gotten, "it's hot!" as an answer.
For the second one, you mean to say that if there was an initial attraction, that's the only time things change for guys?

usaginoshir · Sep 14th, 2009, 11:55 AM

Nooch, I totally agree with you!!! I hate them lie about something stupid, and give me a BIG reason why they lied when I found out. Come on, you are lying, you are wrong. No excuse!

Originally Posted by nooch

Also, why do so many men I know lie about things that are totally unimportant and then act like it's the other person's fault when they get caught lying? I'm not pissed at what you were doing, I'm pissed that you lied!

fashion1sta · Sep 14th, 2009, 01:21 PM

my scenario: my gf's best friend (guy of course) is interested in me and vice-versa, but she made it clear that she doesn't like the idea of the two of us being together. <- i'm not sure if its because she's worried that if it doesn't work out in the future, the friendship can become awkward..........still not sure why though. If the guy is genuinely interested, will he still ask me out even though our mutual friend does not approve? Also, would it be wrong for me to go out with him?

sophiae · Sep 14th, 2009, 01:43 PM

Originally Posted by fashion1sta

my scenario: my gf's best friend (guy of course) is interested in me and vice-versa, but she made it clear that she doesn't like the idea of the two of us being together. <- i'm not sure if its because she's worried that if it doesn't work out in the future, the friendship can become awkward..........still not sure why though. If the guy is genuinely interested, will he still ask me out even though our mutual friend does not approve? Also, would it be wrong for me to go out with him?

I don't think it's wrong for you to go out with him, because you can't help who you have feelings for. To be fair, however, it can become awkward, either if it does work out or doesn't. No one wants to be the third wheel when two of their friends are dating and no one wants to be caught in the middle if it doesn't work out. Just my opinion, though.

fashion1sta · Sep 14th, 2009, 02:03 PM

hmm.. true. But i've seen so many other friends who are willing to find girls/guys for their other friends--- i mean, even i do it sometimes. I just thought that it would be a fairly normal thing.... maybe that's just me.

sophiae · Sep 14th, 2009, 02:20 PM

Originally Posted by fashion1sta

hmm.. true. But i've seen so many other friends who are willing to find girls/guys for their other friends--- i mean, even i do it sometimes. I just thought that it would be a fairly normal thing.... maybe that's just me.

I agree. It is normal. Very often do we see friends become more than friends. I'd go for it, but if you're worried about how your other friend will feel, then don't go for it. Only thing is you'll always wonder "what if?" You know what I mean?

fashion1sta · Sep 14th, 2009, 02:24 PM

But i would definately not ask the guy first. If i'm willing to do this, i need to know that he's interested enough to ask me out regardless of what our friend will say.

Sep 12th, 2009, 01:27 PM	#575
LinaFelina AKA Paul Joined: Jun 2009 Location: CT Posts: 219	Hmm, I think I need to know more. What do the two of you do as friends? How long have you been friends? Has he given you any specific indication that he is NOT interested in being more than friends? Does he ever talk to you about personal things?
	__________________ I rubbed a lamp and a genie popped out. She said, "I will grant you three wishes, you may ask for anything but more wishes, and it will be done." I asked for more genies.

Sep 12th, 2009, 04:18 PM	#577
sophiae Member Joined: Sep 2006 Location: six feet under the stars Posts: 2,955	What is it with guys loving it when two girls make out?! LOL No guy I've asked has ever been able to give me a clear answer! Also, can a guy change his mind about a girl "friend" and like her as more of a "girlfriend" type? I've always wondered these two things, because, heck! I don't think it's hot when two guys kiss, but that's just me. I know girls often change their minds about how they see their guy friends, since it's happened to me in the past.
	__________________ Sophia I've learned not to judge anyone based on the past... People are always changing. Last edited by sophiae; Sep 12th, 2009 at 04:22 PM.

Sep 12th, 2009, 04:26 PM	#578
Charles Sucks at budgeting Joined: Jan 2007 Location: Jacksonville, Fl Posts: 6,194	Men like girls, men like 2 girls...2 girls doing something "taboo" while letting us watch....what's not to love? Second question...typically, no. It also depends on if there was an attraction to begin with. If he's really just a friend, he's just a friend for a reason.
	__________________

Sep 11th, 2009, 05:22 PM	#571
pinkdiamond in love.... Joined: May 2007 Location: London, England Posts: 1,112	How do you know if a male friend likes you as more than just a friend?

Sep 11th, 2009, 06:13 PM	#574
pinkdiamond in love.... Joined: May 2007 Location: London, England Posts: 1,112	I am not going to try the shoulder massage as i am a total shyness failure when it comes to flirting. I just wonder if you are not a flirt, how do you know?! I guess i am more of your girl next door type. It's hard to be shy, i don't want to say any of the above because it would be completely out of character for me KWIM? I am not in anyway cold, i am very caring and gentle and talkative, just not a good flirt.

Sep 12th, 2009, 03:45 PM	#576
pinkdiamond in love.... Joined: May 2007 Location: London, England Posts: 1,112	linafelina, can i pm you with my question?

Sep 14th, 2009, 01:21 PM	#581
fashion1sta Member Joined: Nov 2007 Location: CA Posts: 1,413	my scenario: my gf's best friend (guy of course) is interested in me and vice-versa, but she made it clear that she doesn't like the idea of the two of us being together. <- i'm not sure if its because she's worried that if it doesn't work out in the future, the friendship can become awkward..........still not sure why though. If the guy is genuinely interested, will he still ask me out even though our mutual friend does not approve? Also, would it be wrong for me to go out with him?

Sep 14th, 2009, 02:03 PM	#583
fashion1sta Member Joined: Nov 2007 Location: CA Posts: 1,413	hmm.. true. But i've seen so many other friends who are willing to find girls/guys for their other friends--- i mean, even i do it sometimes. I just thought that it would be a fairly normal thing.... maybe that's just me.

Sep 14th, 2009, 02:24 PM	#585
fashion1sta Member Joined: Nov 2007 Location: CA Posts: 1,413	But i would definately not ask the guy first. If i'm willing to do this, i need to know that he's interested enough to ask me out regardless of what our friend will say.

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