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emmaamme · Nov 1st, 2009, 02:14 PM

Hey everyone,

I have a bit of a problem. I really like this guy at school.. but i'm just so unbelievably shy and insecure, I don't know how to act. We always laugh together, but i'm never seen as anything more then a friend. and i just don't know how to act... i can't not be shy, it's impossible for me. i'm insecure with everything I do, and he's quite a loud, outgoing person. Even when I don't feel uncomfortable, i blush haha. and i don't know what to say when it goes quiet.

does anyone have any suggestions to what i can do?

any help would be great,
thanks xxx

simplygm819 · Nov 1st, 2009, 02:23 PM

Just be yourself. Try to think of him as someone you feel comfortable talking to..and remember not to try too hard because it's usually detected.

ami kio · Nov 1st, 2009, 03:01 PM

I think that one thing to realize is that -- although it may not seem like it -- other people have the same worries/insecurities as you do. The only difference is that they've said, "To Hell with it!" and have taken the plunge. Sit down and think about your insecurities. Are your fears rational? I'm not questioning whether they're valid or real -- but would they make sense to the average Jane Doe?

For example, you have this dress that you love, but it's not something that you'd normally wear. You tell yourself that you can't carry it off. But instead of that, pretend that you're an actress playing a role, and your role is to rock that dress.

You've seen models strut on runways -- practice projecting that kind of confidence (e.g. head up, shoulders back, back straight). Cheesy as it sounds, believing it helps make it so.

As for conversations, have some random light conversation starters ready. Read some offbeat articles (e.g. Yahoo has an "odd news" section, I think), and bring them up saying, "Oh, did you see that article about X? Isn't that crazy?" One of my favorite conversation starters is survey questions. "I knew this guy who thought/did X, but I think Y. So what's yours/what do you think?" On flirty one that I had was, "What's your best 'come hither' look?" I had the most fun with that one!

Nov 1st, 2009, 02:14 PM	#1
emmaamme OP Member Joined: Jul 2008 Posts: 755	what should i do? Hey everyone, I have a bit of a problem. I really like this guy at school.. but i'm just so unbelievably shy and insecure, I don't know how to act. We always laugh together, but i'm never seen as anything more then a friend. and i just don't know how to act... i can't not be shy, it's impossible for me. i'm insecure with everything I do, and he's quite a loud, outgoing person. Even when I don't feel uncomfortable, i blush haha. and i don't know what to say when it goes quiet. does anyone have any suggestions to what i can do? any help would be great, thanks xxx
emmaamme OP Member Joined: Jul 2008 Posts: 755

Nov 1st, 2009, 02:23 PM	#2
simplygm819 Member Joined: Jan 2009 Posts: 226	Just be yourself. Try to think of him as someone you feel comfortable talking to..and remember not to try too hard because it's usually detected.
simplygm819 Member Joined: Jan 2009 Posts: 226	__________________ A girl should be two things: classy and fabulous!

Nov 1st, 2009, 03:01 PM	#3
ami kio Member Joined: May 2006 Location: Down South Posts: 1,334	I think that one thing to realize is that -- although it may not seem like it -- other people have the same worries/insecurities as you do. The only difference is that they've said, "To Hell with it!" and have taken the plunge. Sit down and think about your insecurities. Are your fears rational? I'm not questioning whether they're valid or real -- but would they make sense to the average Jane Doe? For example, you have this dress that you love, but it's not something that you'd normally wear. You tell yourself that you can't carry it off. But instead of that, pretend that you're an actress playing a role, and your role is to rock that dress. You've seen models strut on runways -- practice projecting that kind of confidence (e.g. head up, shoulders back, back straight). Cheesy as it sounds, believing it helps make it so. As for conversations, have some random light conversation starters ready. Read some offbeat articles (e.g. Yahoo has an "odd news" section, I think), and bring them up saying, "Oh, did you see that article about X? Isn't that crazy?" One of my favorite conversation starters is survey questions. "I knew this guy who thought/did X, but I think Y. So what's yours/what do you think?" On flirty one that I had was, "What's your best 'come hither' look?" I had the most fun with that one!
	__________________ On a ban... unless I find something that stops me in my tracks. twitter

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