what should i do

[xoxo_chanel]

so ive been seeing this guy for a month and we are at the point right now where things are really unclear and it seems like it isnt working out. im not torn up over the fact that we wont work out, its jsut i dont know how to talk about it with him. the thing is is that its his birthday today and ive been stressing out allll day.
i just had my birthday 2 weeks ago and he got a present we went out for dinner 2 times. it was really nice. but today its his and i dont know what to do. we arent i guess officially together anymore or we are just at a rough patch. i dk. i know that i just want to stay friends with him. but im stressing out beause i dont know what to do today! i already called him to wish him a happy birthday it was a pretty short convo as he has some essays to finish writing up. i bought him a gift but im not even sure if i should give it to him. i dont want to seem like a horrible person because i he did so much to celebrate my birthday but nothing on his today. he had his party a few days ago. should i attempt to talk to him tonight just to clear the air cause its really stressing me out? should i give him his present???

[juneping]

i would give him the gift since you bought it already. u can take him out today for dinner...but i wouldn't break up with him today..it's his bday.

[xoxo_chanel]

^yea but i can tell he is not really feeling it either...i just dont know what to do. i really want to talk tonight so i can stop stressing about it but i feel bad because it is his birthday you know?

[talexs]

If you think he's not feeling it either I wouldn't even bring it up, sounds like this will all fade away. I wouldn't bring it up today, it's his birthday and it seems like it would possibly be like talking about something that you two may have already silently acknowledged.

[xoxo_chanel]

^ like just let it be? talk about it another day? i jsut dont want to be the jerk who doesnt even care that its his birthday you know? i want to take him out for dinner or whatever tonight but i have two exams tomorrow plus i cant stop stresing about this..

[Jeneen]

Give him the gift and with the relationship, just let it fade for the next few days. If you think you need to have a gentle break up talk after the few days, go ahead. Don't make it a big thing - I'm glad to see you are dating again! Dating is all about trying people on - not everyone will work out and that's okay - have fun and keep at it xo

[lorihmatthews]

Your exams are way more important than a relationship that's only a month old.

Don't make a big deal out of his birthday, and I'm sure he isn't going to either.

[talexs]

Originally Posted by xoxo_chanel

^ like just let it be? talk about it another day? i jsut dont want to be the jerk who doesnt even care that its his birthday you know? i want to take him out for dinner or whatever tonight but i have two exams tomorrow plus i cant stop stresing about this..

just let it be
Good way to put it, from what you have said you don't sound like you're being inconsiderate at all. Things change and when it was your bday you two were in a different place, you wished him a happy birthday and if I were in your shoes I would give him the gift, but otherwise you don't sound like you're doing anything that could be considered mean.

[xoxo_chanel]

^ yea but im just worried it will come off wrong to him, like im inconsiderate...and i didnt appreciate anything he did for me. because i did and still do.
i know hes in my area for class right now, so should i tell him to stop by my place to jsut to talk quickly...it just sucks how everything comes up at once like exams plus relationship stuff.
if it wasnt for exams tomorrow i would have already called him and arranged a dinner where i took him out or something...

[ahertz]

^^ No, you're not listening to what everyone is saying. Don't talk to him about your relationship tonight, wait until after his bday.

Give him his gift, tell him you're busy studying and let it go until another night.

[bagnshoofetish]

slow down! a month is not long enough to be stressing this much about this. (didn't you just go through a bad break up a month or two ago? you know, where you wanted to call your bf...is this him?)
If this is a new guy - just play it cool man. Give him his gift when you see him again and leave it at that. He did what he wanted to do for your BD. You don't have to go the same lengths he did if you aren't feeling it.
stop stressing and try and have fun!

[Charles]

You said you want to be friends with him, yes? If that's the case, then give him his gift, wish him a happy bday, then tell him you need to deal with some school issues. At this point, if you really want to keep him as a friend, then treat him like one. Wouldn't you give your friend a gift for his/her bday? IF so, then do it for him.

Once you're past your school stuff and his bday is over, have a talk with him and tell that dating him isn't working out, but that you still want to remain friends.

[turboflgrl]

1. Give him the gift.
2. Let him know you'd like to take him out but you have 2 finals that are extremely important (just like his essays are to him!)
3. Let it be and if you guys must talk about your "relationship", do it another time. It isn't fair to ruin his birthday to make your own conscience feel better.

[bagaholic85]

Originally Posted by Charles

You said you want to be friends with him, yes? If that's the case, then give him his gift, wish him a happy bday, then tell him you need to deal with some school issues. At this point, if you really want to keep him as a friend, then treat him like one. Wouldn't you give your friend a gift for his/her bday? IF so, then do it for him. Once you're past your school stuff and his bday is over, have a talk with him and tell that dating him isn't working out, but that you still want to remain friends.

agreed