[hellosunshine]

I've always wondered why certain types of guys only approach me or hit on me while the ones I do like never do.....


So here's the question,

what kinda guys approach you or hit on you and you just don't understand why? Like guys that you've never even thought were your type, just happen to think it's okay to approach you.


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for me i always get hit on by frat boys and i never go for them ever! I'm naturally a quiet person and the ones that always hit on me are the ones that are the most obnixous and loud and WAY too outgoing/party-hopping type. I never understood what characteristic about me made them think like, 'hey she'd be perfect for me, so why don't i go and say hi'...i'm the total polar opposite of them and not to mention awful, corny, lame overused quote that they always feed me....i'm usually so freaked out that I just walk away with a smile if i can muster it up.



what about you guys ?

[devoted]

Those frat boy types hit on EVERY female.


I don't know which types hit on me, I get a whole range of different personalities. I have to think about this more....

[Zophie]

OMG, I always ask myself the same question! And I mean some of them are REALLY not my type!

Here are a few examples:

* The most recent was I was walking in the park. A guy comes up on his bike and asks me where Bordeaux Street is. I tell him where it is. Then he starts telling me about how they caught the Chinese spying on the Americans on Bordeaux Street and that it was on the news. Well, I'm thinking he's a crazy conspiracy theory nut, but as it turns out, this actually is true. So I'm trying to get rid of him and he goes, "You sure have some nice buns. See you later." And then he rides off on his bike.

* I went to an outdoor BBQ in my friend's neighborhood. It was sort of open to whoever wants to come. It was for Halloween and I was dressed as a witch. Well, a guy with no teeth would not leave me alone. He kept offering me beer and telling me I'm a pretty witch.

* I was driving at 6 a.m. to pick up friends to go out of town to the beach for the day. It was still dark. It was early Sunday morning. I pull up next to a guy in a Volvo. He's playing on his Blackberry. He rolls down his window and waves to get my attention. He's hella cute! So he asks me where I'm headed. I tell him out of town. He responds, "Out of town? Wanna go smoke a blunt before you go?"

* I go to the grocery store. I'm looking at the wine. Some dude who looks sort of like a junkie comes up and starts talking to me about wine and what kind goes with what food. Turns out he's a chef. He just sort of had a shaggy heroin addict look to him. Totally not my type as I'm more attracted to guys in suits. He will not leave me alone! He keeps hanging around and telling me about a party his friends are having and that he wants to see me again.

* I'm walking down the street downtown. Some crazy loon is talking to himself but slips in something about me being pretty.

There are many others, but these are the first that come to mind. I asked my mom one time what it is about me. She said it's not a reflection on me that people I am not interested in hit on me and I should take it as a compliment. It is still very frustrating that when I do find myself attracted to soemone they never pursue me but every loser in the city seems to follow me down the street.

[caitlin1214]

I didn't feel like typing this over again, so I copied and pasted from the Grinds My Gears thread:


This was the first time that anyone has hit on me.

It happened around the beginning of June:

I got out of class and I took the subway home. Walking through my station, I was lost in thought about all the things I had to do before I flew home to Boston the next day. In my daze, I accidentally bumped into a guy. He was young, cute . . . and judging from the tattoo on his arm, his name was Mel. We started talking because he wanted to know where a tanning salon was. He's never been to this particular station before and he had a coupon from a tanning salon for one free session. He felt the need to tell me he spent all day working out because he got a job as a bouncer in a new bar and it was recommended he do this extra workout. At one point, I walked ahead of him and I heard him mutter something that sounded like either "Thank you" or "You're cute." Later on, I found out it was "You're cute" because he told me he meant what he said earlier.

Long story short, he asks me, "I don't suppose I could get your number, could I?"

Okay, don't hit on me in the subway station, especially since you don't know my name, and I don't know yours. (I mean, I'm a little flattered, but I'm also offended.)
You want to be with me, you be friends with me first. I am not a booty call.

[azhangie]

Old men hit on me....i dont know why. I dont understand this because i look 18 but i'm 24...so i dont know if that makes it better or worse. I've had 3 men in thier 40's hit on me in the last month. 2 from the gym and 1 at the mall.

[claireZk]

Old men- 50's and up (I'm 26). The really old men are kinda cute... I had one old guy (probably early 70's) tell me I was the most gorgeous girl he'd ever seen. Another one told me I reminded him of Jackie-O. But the guys my dad's age are just gross-- they stare at my boobs and actually try to pick me up. AS IF!


Teenage boys- like 20 and younger. It makes me feel like a dirty old lady, but I get hooked up with lots of free food and movie rentals, and I never have to carry anything to my car


"Comic Book Guy" guys- those of you who've seen the Simpsons know what I'm talking about... Trekkies with a bad attitude and even worse hygiene. These guys hate everyone, except for me that is. I am their Queen

[claireZk]

Originally Posted by Zophie

So I'm trying to get rid of him and he goes, "You sure have some nice buns. See you later." And then he rides off on his bike.

OMG I'm literally lmao!!! He did not say "buns"! Who SAYS that?!?!

[SPOILEDkiwi]

I always get really gangster guys - black, white, asian, hispanic. I never get the normal preppy clean cut ones that I like. Well now I have a bf so it really doesnt matter. The "wangster" types are the funniest (no offense to any of you that are into this look) because they talk like they're "thugs" but it's really just a fake accent they think will get chicks. I don't even know why they hit on me, because I dress pretty preppy and have no ass. I think I can count on one hand the times a normal cute guy has approached me I think it's just the way the world works.

[kaye]

generally, i don't really get picked up (i look unapproachable, i don't have a friendly looking face). but when i do, it's always white guys with asian fetish and they are always in their 30s and 40s. i hate when guys try to talk to me, period. i completely ignore them and dismiss their comments. i'll just, straight up, walk away from them and look the other way. it's such a natural reflex to me that i do it to all guys whether i find them hot or not.

[devoted]

Originally Posted by kaye

generally, i don't really get picked up (i look unapproachable, i don't have a friendly looking face). but when i do, it's always white guys with asian fetish and they are always in their 30s and 40s. i hate when guys try to talk to me, period. i completely ignore them and dismiss their comments. i'll just, straight up, walk away from them and look the other way. it's such a natural reflex to me that i do it to all guys whether i find them hot or not.

OMG, I can relate perfectly to this......Except if the guy is REALLY hot I might make an exception, and I am not Asian. I get told that I am very unapproachable all the time, how funny!
And physically, the men who come on to me tend to be clean-cut, and good-looking, all dressed really well and intelligent. But personalities ranged between the charming, witty ones.....to the moody, shy ones.
So I can't pinpoint a "type"....but the ones being described on this thread are hilarious!

[ItalianFashion]

I get the perverted ones who think talking about sex right when meeting you or on a first date is acceptable. I even had a Manager do this! I also attract tons and tons of foreigners usually from the middle east. I have been told a few times its because of my long dark hair. It reminds them of girls from home. My husband is now protective over me when any foreigners are around because I seem to draw them to me no matter if he is there or not. I also get very young guys. I am 36... they will say have you been out with anyone younger before? Do you mind it.... I would like to go out with you and I do not mind your age. I did not mind 5-6 yrs younger but teenager or early 20s.... Come on! So actually everyone I have been out with has been younger because no one my age would ever ask me out. Now married and husband is 5 years younger.

[helium]

Well this is easy for me to answer.

Considering that the guys I like are shy, timid, and nerdy, none of them are ever going to approach me.

Considering that I supposedly look 'preppy' and 'popular' even though i'm a giant freakin' nerd, I get hit on by the jocks who I hate. I hate their arrogant, smartass 'I can get any girl I want and do anything without getting caught' attitude.

So yeah. The nerds just don't have the confidence to come up to me. Not that I need them to, I found a perfect nerd who I cuddle every night .

[Pursegrrl]

...I never really noticed a certain type who approaches me, honestly. I just don't take it that seriously in general. Meaning, if a guy starts chatting me up I just assume he found me attractive but NOT that he wants to date me or anything. It's just very lighthearted.

[helium]

Originally Posted by Pursegrrl

...I never really noticed a certain type who approaches me, honestly. I just don't take it that seriously in general. Meaning, if a guy starts chatting me up I just assume he found me attractive but NOT that he wants to date me or anything. It's just very lighthearted.

What's the difference between chatting up and wanting to date you? I'm very, very bad at telling the difference, so I assume none of them want to date me, and then I talk to them, then they want to date me, and then my boyfriend gets annoyed that I didn't fend them off... but I don't want to assume too much you know?

So if you could answer, it would be good... it would help me a great deal !

[Pursegrrl]

Originally Posted by helium

What's the difference between chatting up and wanting to date you? I'm very, very bad at telling the difference, so I assume none of them want to date me, and then I talk to them, then they want to date me, and then my boyfriend gets annoyed that I didn't fend them off... but I don't want to assume too much you know?

So if you could answer, it would be good... it would help me a great deal !

Well I guess I just take any chit chat at face value...it's just small talk and nothing more. I used to hope in the back of my mind that if a guy I was attracted to approached me and chatted me up that that automatically meant he wanted to date me. Not the case. I read a couple of John Gray's books about this, and his philosophy is that men ARE indeed attracted to physical looks first, but that doesn't mean they want a relationship with every woman they find attractive. Understanding this was actually very refreshing for me.

Not sure I'm making any sense here b/c it's late and I need to get some sleep. I guess I have found it easier to just not take a guy's approach/pick up attempt chit chat that seriously...at least not at first unless he really wants to pursue me, get my #, ask me out, etc.