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rainyjewels · Jan 6th, 2009, 11:19 PM

yes yes yes yes yes. it is absolutely cheating. i'm so sorry.

Zophie · Jan 7th, 2009, 12:04 AM

I think unless he tells you about it, it's cheating. It's the secretiveness that bothers me.

rendodan110 · Jan 7th, 2009, 12:07 AM

cheating IMO. I would be furious.

sweetdreamer16 · Jan 7th, 2009, 01:52 AM

i'm so sorry your going through this! it is totally cheating but i think what is worse is that he is totally disrespecting you and your feelings! your his wife! not some random women he meets on the internet!

Charles · Jan 7th, 2009, 02:24 AM

If it's not cheating...why hasn't he told you about all of it?

He's hiding it from you and you don't approve...therefore, it's cheating.

luxurina · Jan 7th, 2009, 02:42 AM

I would consider that cheating...but maybe you need to talk to him and find out why he feels the need to do that stuff..

Katie68506 · Jan 7th, 2009, 02:53 AM

Originally Posted by EmmaLee83

To answer your question, I think it is cheating.

But this seems like an odd first post for the OP, IMO.

me too! To find tPF, join the same day to post this seems odd.

angelsflying · Jan 7th, 2009, 07:53 AM

Im sorry if I caused concerns about joining the same day I made my 1st post...why is it odd? I had just found out yesterday about my hubbys lies,and I was upset,and needed to vent and ask others for their opinions...thats all...
But thanks for everyones opinions, this helped alot ! He will be getting the "help" he needs in order to save our marriage

aliburke84 · Jan 7th, 2009, 09:05 AM

Yes yes yes. Cheating, betrayal, disrespect...whatever you want to call it, it's wrong. Anything that you have to hide from your SO is wrong no matter what you call it.

I'm sorry honey.

I just noticed that you said he will be getting the help he needs, I'm glad to hear that.

BagLadie · Jan 7th, 2009, 09:13 AM

This is different than viewing porn. This is him communicating with other woman. A guy that watches porn and gets off on it is...normal (as long as it's not an addiction and consuming his life...and as long as he isn't lying about it). But a guy that is interacting with women online.....yeah.....a completely different thing.

Desi · Jan 7th, 2009, 11:51 AM

Sorry hun but i definitely think this is cheating. it would drive me nuts as well. regardless of whether your husband says its cheating or not- the fact is that you don't like it or appreciate it, and he should respect you and stop.

lovinalotofbags · Jan 7th, 2009, 12:14 PM

It definitely is cheating and will develop to meeting people face to face and progress to other things.

littlerock · Jan 7th, 2009, 02:09 PM

Originally Posted by berryblondeboys

I have no issue with men (or women) looking at porn and *doing their own thing*, but when it becomes interactive, that's another level. I agree that it's some sort of sex addiction or living out fantasy without actually cheating, unless it a relationship that has developed with someone and they are having cyber sex - that is cheating for sure.

I don't know how I would feel about it... He's not actually with another woman (or man), he's not putting anyone at risk for STD's and while he's masturbating online... it's not feeling, touching, *physically* cheating...

I guess in a way I have to ask myself. How much different is it than a guy doing his thing with a porno flick or magazine?

Yet, I know I would be quite upset if I discovered my DH was having an interactive *solo* session whereas I don't have issues with him looking at a girlie magazine. I'm not naive to think he doesn't masturbate besides having sexual relations with me...

But... I would be upset yes... not sure I would quite classify it as cheating in the traditional sense though.

I completely agree with this post. I think you need to find out what is at the core of this behaviour. Is this just another form of porn to him? Does he actually have a relationship with someone on the site (ie keeps chatting and masturbating with the same woman)? If so then I think you guys have a lot to work out if you so choose.

I really feel for you and I know what a hard time this must be. If you want to chat feel free to PM me.

Good luck

aaallabama · Jan 7th, 2009, 02:28 PM

^^ IMO< it's definitely cheating

Charlie · Jan 7th, 2009, 02:35 PM

All I can say it is sorry you are going through this and I hope everything works out for you and him. Good luck.

Do you have any children? just wondering.

Jan 6th, 2009, 11:19 PM	#31
rainyjewels eat me Joined: Nov 2006 Location: NYC Posts: 4,780	yes yes yes yes yes. it is absolutely cheating. i'm so sorry.
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Jan 7th, 2009, 12:04 AM	#32
Zophie I <3 my Maltese! Joined: Feb 2007 Location: New Orleans, LA Posts: 8,491	I think unless he tells you about it, it's cheating. It's the secretiveness that bothers me.
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Jan 7th, 2009, 12:07 AM	#33
rendodan110 Danielle Joined: Oct 2007 Location: Northern Colorado Posts: 2,211	cheating IMO. I would be furious.
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Jan 7th, 2009, 01:52 AM	#34
sweetdreamer16 Member Joined: May 2008 Location: Vancouver Posts: 2,035	i'm so sorry your going through this! it is totally cheating but i think what is worse is that he is totally disrespecting you and your feelings! your his wife! not some random women he meets on the internet!
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Jan 7th, 2009, 02:24 AM	#35
Charles Sucks at budgeting Joined: Jan 2007 Location: Jacksonville, Fl Posts: 6,194	If it's not cheating...why hasn't he told you about all of it? He's hiding it from you and you don't approve...therefore, it's cheating.
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Jan 7th, 2009, 02:42 AM	#36
luxurina sooo luxurious... Joined: Nov 2007 Location: USA via Casablanca Posts: 920	I would consider that cheating...but maybe you need to talk to him and find out why he feels the need to do that stuff..
	__________________ Check out my new blog: http://www.luxurina.blogspot.com/ "Fashions fade, style is eternal"--Yves Saint Laurent CL Most Wanted-PM me if found: Mad Mary 38.5 or 39 any color, leather or suede.

Jan 7th, 2009, 07:53 AM	#38
angelsflying OP Member Joined: Jan 2009 Location: Georgia Posts: 5	Web cam sex and chatting/Is that cheating? Im sorry if I caused concerns about joining the same day I made my 1st post...why is it odd? I had just found out yesterday about my hubbys lies,and I was upset,and needed to vent and ask others for their opinions...thats all... But thanks for everyones opinions, this helped alot ! He will be getting the "help" he needs in order to save our marriage

Jan 7th, 2009, 09:05 AM	#39
aliburke84 Member Joined: Jun 2008 Location: JC/NYC Posts: 2,443	Yes yes yes. Cheating, betrayal, disrespect...whatever you want to call it, it's wrong. Anything that you have to hide from your SO is wrong no matter what you call it. I'm sorry honey. I just noticed that you said he will be getting the help he needs, I'm glad to hear that.
	__________________ *Because I'm loving every wonderful, horrible minute of this*

Jan 7th, 2009, 09:13 AM	#40
BagLadie Got a handle on it Joined: Nov 2006 Location: Red Sox Nation Posts: 7,002	This is different than viewing porn. This is him communicating with other woman. A guy that watches porn and gets off on it is...normal (as long as it's not an addiction and consuming his life...and as long as he isn't lying about it). But a guy that is interacting with women online.....yeah.....a completely different thing.
	__________________ If life hands you lemons, make a vodka and lemonade. Then use the rest on your elbows.

Jan 7th, 2009, 11:51 AM	#41
Desi Rebecca Minkoff Mod Joined: Dec 2007 Location: Alpharetta, GA Posts: 17,997	Sorry hun but i definitely think this is cheating. it would drive me nuts as well. regardless of whether your husband says its cheating or not- the fact is that you don't like it or appreciate it, and he should respect you and stop.
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Jan 7th, 2009, 12:14 PM	#42
lovinalotofbags In for the long haul Joined: Mar 2008 Location: South Carolina Posts: 2,553	It definitely is cheating and will develop to meeting people face to face and progress to other things.
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Jan 7th, 2009, 02:28 PM	#44
aaallabama r.i.p. my angel Joined: May 2006 Location: nyc baby Posts: 9,595	^^ IMO< it's definitely cheating
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Jan 7th, 2009, 02:35 PM	#45
Charlie Is focused O_O Joined: Apr 2007 Posts: 12,163	All I can say it is sorry you are going through this and I hope everything works out for you and him. Good luck. Do you have any children? just wondering.
Charlie Is focused O_O Joined: Apr 2007 Posts: 12,163	__________________ One pound at a time, lift Charlie lift! Stop LIVE animal skinning in China - sign the petition

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