pictures of the ex-girl

[amber11]

My bf is really into video editing and photography so he keeps thousands of videos and pics on his computer, hes also from another country so since i haven't gotten to meet much of his family he shows me a lot of videos and pictures of them on his computer... so i just out of boredom and hoping to see more of his hometown went on (he just leaves it out) I went onto the areas he had showed me... now i honestly didn't think it was a big deal, looking back on it -what was i thinking -but he was just so open about showing me all this stuff I didn't think of it as an invasion of privacy because we use each other's computers all the time.

I came across hundreds of pictures of his ex... he had told me briefly they had dated for about 5 months a year ago and he broke up with her, and i don't think they still talk but i've never though about it till now.. and this was just recently like earlier today that i found these pictures...and i know it's still fresh but does it seem weird for him to keep all these photos of her still?

I know i am being a bit hypocritical because i have a few of my ex because i was just too lazy to go through and delete them but he has hundreds of her... and to his credit they are also kind of intermixed with months so he couldn't delete a whole album...

i know everyone has pasts and this shouldn't bother me but i guess seeing it and knowing are two different things... what do you guys think on the topic and am i being too ridiculous about this? logically i think this is no big deal but of course i cant really help how i feel..

thanks in advance for any advice or insight!

[turboflgrl]

IMO, they are just pictures and I don't see a reason to be upset. Especially the huge quantity of them, that could take hours or days to find and delete all of them. Personally, I have a TON of pictures that I am admittedly too lazy to delete off of my computer. Unless he's meeting up with or talking to her behind your back, I don't see an issue.

[amber11]

^ thank you for your response and i know your right! i don't really get where the jealousy comes from he doesn't give me any reason to feel this way? and i hate being a jealous girlfriend i don't want to be that

[vhdos]

This issue has been brought up before. The bottom line is that even if he got rid of the pictures, he'd still have the images in his mind. I don't view pictures of an ex as threatening in any way. Let it go.

[simplygm819]

it's a natural first instinct to be jealous when you first saw these pictures..and hundreds of them too but it shouldn't come across as threatening so really, let it go.

[Luccibag]

Na, its no biggie. In fact, I just ran into an exboyfriend on facebook from like 20 years ago and he emailed me a bunch of pics he had taken of me. He used to love to take pics back then and was a very neat and organized person (back then there was no such thing as OCD but Im sure that's what he had) Anyway, it didnt surprise me that he'd still have them. It was nice to see them and to have some more pics of the eighties so it worked out great! He is currently happily married with a couple of kids too.

[AnimalCrackers]

I understand hanging on to non-romantic pictures of an ex simply because they illustrate a certain time in someone's life. His keeping them probably has nothing to do with her.

[ChanelMommy]

Eh, I wouldn't want to see them but I don't think he means any harm. I would let it go as long as they are not pics of them all over each other .

[juneping]

if he secretly store it somewhere then i would get suspicious. but his computer and a lot of them...i guess him being a photographer i wouldn't be too concern.

[amber11]

thanks you guys, i appreciate the feed back... and sometimes i just need other people to be like hey get over it to see things fully....

[flashy.stems]

i don't think he means harm, and its nothing to worry about.. however, i'm gonna be honest and say i'd be upset and want him to delete them. im immature i know.. :P

[olialm1]

I freaked out when I saw pictures of my s/o and his ex on his digital camera and that there were photos of them tagged together on facebook. Looking back at this I feel REALLY stupid because they are JUST pictures and he rarely used his camera and he had absolutely no problem deleting/untagging the photos. I'd say no biggie!

[Cheetah7]

Well, you're going to feel the way you feel but you got to remember that they're just pictures. There's nothing wrong with having them, they are a part of his past, nothing more. It's not like he's hiding them from you as you are able to view them in the first place. Just let it go. It's no big deal.

[Hessefan]

I totally disagree with everyone. My husband and I had the exact same issue when we first met and had a huge fight about it, which seems stupid, but it was intense at the time. The difference was that I found a nude picture of his Ex, not realising it was someone he knew (I thought it was downloaded), but he rushed up to delete it, and I got very upset, because he then deleted a bunch more. Of course it is about insecurity, we didn't know each other that long and had just moved in together. It was a big fight but I realised I was just jealous. It got worse when he asked for a memory stick to save some work and found pictures of my ex-boyfriends, which I hadn't realised were on there or that I even had them. He got upset this time and we eventually agreed to delete photos of our exes, because for us our relationship is now the most important one and we thought it is inappropriate to have pictures of exes around. This was a few years ago and I don't miss the photos, and there's no danger of stumbling upon them and causing us stress. This is abviously just us, and other people may be attached to their pictures and want to keep them as memories of a different time. Or just not think anything of it and find it no big deal.
But, I think it is a bit unfair to tell you that you are wrong and should get over it, because if it really upsets you maybe you guys could talk about it and see if it would bother you both. I also find it strange if he has hundreds of pictures from a 5 month relationship. If it was 5 years it owuld be different, but he could be still attached to her, or just not think anything of it. If it bothers you very much, I'd talk to him about it and see what he says.

[nataliam1976]

If he had them in some hidden folder, just pics of her, then i would be worried. as you said yourself he has thousands of pics sorted by dates, I bet he doesnt even remember they are still sitting there.