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Sternchen · Sep 23rd, 2009, 03:46 AM

Originally Posted by vuittonamour

ps -- i'd be careful about posting too much info about your relationship here. even though i was just excited, i learned the hard way a couple years back. even though your bf posted a blog about this stuff on myspace, it still could be pretty protected if his profile only allows friends to read it. would he be too pleased to know you posted this on an online forum asking for advice? he may not care at all for all i know, but i'm just putting out there. remember it's the internet and what goes around comes around.

I think we all learned from your experience

Bella · Sep 23rd, 2009, 04:00 AM

I agree with posting his thoughts here.. not the best idea.

But as far as opening up with you, look at it this positively, he is, in his own way. You say he doesn't really post like this much ever... so take the opportunity to talk to him. Don't be upset or disappointed he didn't tell you this directly. You love him. It's sounds like he's feeling the stress and pressure of life right now, so just let him know you read it and love him and will support him any way possible.

Cheetah7 · Sep 23rd, 2009, 06:32 AM

Hmmm, I think some men find it easier to articulate their thoughts thru writing or blogging about it. I don't think it has as much to do with his desire (or lack of) to talk to you about it than it has to do with his inability to say what's on his mind. Maybe he finds it difficult to talk about emotional things with you. Why can't you just ask him why he didn't talk to you about it first?

Sternchen · Sep 23rd, 2009, 08:26 AM

There are just some things that you don't want to talk to your spouse / partner about. That's just the way it is. I know many women expect their husbands/boyfriends to talk to them about EVERYTHING, but sometimes that's just not what the person needs. I enjoy writing blogs because I'm not really writing / talking to a specific persion...I'm just writing my feelings, my thoughts and my emotions.

OP, if I were you I'd ask one of the mods to edit your post. You don't want your boyfriend to stumble upon your post and freak out at you. I know that I would b FURIOUS with my husband if he posted any of my private information (including blog entries) anywhere without asking for my permission first.

bagnshoofetish · Sep 23rd, 2009, 12:08 PM

Is his blog available for just anyone to view it? Because if not, you posting his thoughts is kind of a violation of his trust in a way. If his blog is public, no problem.
That said, I would tell him the truth - "Hey, I read your blog. I'm sorry your'e feeling stressed right now. Is there anything I can do to help you?"

and leave it at that. If you really care more about what he's going through, thats all you will need. Don't make this about your ego and him not sharing something personal with you. Though you are a couple, the best relationships are ones that give each other freedom where that person needs it. My DH and I have been together some 18 years and I don't have to be a part of every little crevice of his thoughts and doings. He has actually written things down to get them off his chest and has let me read some things but I would never EVER ask to read things he didn't want me to read. Everyone deserves privacy and respect even if you are a couple. I sure want that from him too.

Sep 23rd, 2009, 04:00 AM	#17
Bella Earth to Bella Joined: Mar 2006 Posts: 4,348	I agree with posting his thoughts here.. not the best idea. But as far as opening up with you, look at it this positively, he is, in his own way. You say he doesn't really post like this much ever... so take the opportunity to talk to him. Don't be upset or disappointed he didn't tell you this directly. You love him. It's sounds like he's feeling the stress and pressure of life right now, so just let him know you read it and love him and will support him any way possible.
Bella Earth to Bella Joined: Mar 2006 Posts: 4,348	__________________

Sep 23rd, 2009, 06:32 AM	#18
Cheetah7 Member Joined: Aug 2009 Location: Here, there and everywhere Posts: 302	Hmmm, I think some men find it easier to articulate their thoughts thru writing or blogging about it. I don't think it has as much to do with his desire (or lack of) to talk to you about it than it has to do with his inability to say what's on his mind. Maybe he finds it difficult to talk about emotional things with you. Why can't you just ask him why he didn't talk to you about it first?
	__________________ Last edited by Cheetah7; Sep 23rd, 2009 at 06:53 AM.

Sep 23rd, 2009, 08:26 AM	#19
Sternchen Proud mama of 3! Joined: May 2006 Location: Bavaria, Germany Posts: 13,951	There are just some things that you don't want to talk to your spouse / partner about. That's just the way it is. I know many women expect their husbands/boyfriends to talk to them about EVERYTHING, but sometimes that's just not what the person needs. I enjoy writing blogs because I'm not really writing / talking to a specific persion...I'm just writing my feelings, my thoughts and my emotions. OP, if I were you I'd ask one of the mods to edit your post. You don't want your boyfriend to stumble upon your post and freak out at you. I know that I would b FURIOUS with my husband if he posted any of my private information (including blog entries) anywhere without asking for my permission first.
	__________________ Dear Santa, I have been a very good girl this year and have worked very hard for my family, my school and my job. This year I would like to wish for only one thing: THE CUPCAKE CAR!!! Please and thank you. Love, Melanie

Sep 23rd, 2009, 12:08 PM	#20
bagnshoofetish keep smiling.... Joined: Feb 2006 Posts: 20,377	Is his blog available for just anyone to view it? Because if not, you posting his thoughts is kind of a violation of his trust in a way. If his blog is public, no problem. That said, I would tell him the truth - "Hey, I read your blog. I'm sorry your'e feeling stressed right now. Is there anything I can do to help you?" and leave it at that. If you really care more about what he's going through, thats all you will need. Don't make this about your ego and him not sharing something personal with you. Though you are a couple, the best relationships are ones that give each other freedom where that person needs it. My DH and I have been together some 18 years and I don't have to be a part of every little crevice of his thoughts and doings. He has actually written things down to get them off his chest and has let me read some things but I would never EVER ask to read things he didn't want me to read. Everyone deserves privacy and respect even if you are a couple. I sure want that from him too.
	__________________

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