Making girlfriends and having a social life - not for me?

caitlin1214 · Jun 30th, 2008, 12:21 AM

I love browsing bookstores by myself for as long as I want.

I love choosing the movie I want to see and then watching it in peace without worrying about people talking to me.

In college, I loved not freaking out if I didn't see anyone I knew/wanted to sit with in the cafeteria.

carvedwords · Jun 30th, 2008, 04:03 AM

I'm exactly the same way. I always feel I'm being judged by the girls I meet and I hate that. I've had a few good close friends and have been burned by all of them. It's kind of made it hard for me to trust anyone lately, but sometimes I do wish I had a small group that I could click with.

mellecyn · Jun 30th, 2008, 07:37 AM

This might be due to where you live ?
You seem really cool to be around and have normal healthy interests !! I love music too and going to concerts, movies, I´m not much of an outdoor sports person but my girlfriends are....biking, walking, etc....
You´re meeting the wrong women unfortunately, with my GFs we meet up for brunch, coffee but we never bitch around, we just have a good laugh talking about anything, and joking around.
We´ve even travel or have week-ends together !!
I´ve never been close to too girly girls, but more to the creative indie type (still feminine), I don´t like fussy people.... there should be more than 1 type of women where you live ??

tmc089 · Jun 30th, 2008, 08:07 AM

Lol, your completley normal.

I'm in a similar situation. I'm 19, gonna be a sophmore in college, and every single person I know from school drinks heavily and parties literally every night. Me on the other hand...no. I rarely drink...honestly probably like 3 times a year. And when I do drink, I have one single drink. All the girls at school are so concerned about which guy they're gonna hook up with next, if they're hair and makeup is perfect, and who's getting booze for the night. Yeah, I like doing hair/makeup/girly stuff...but I'm in a serious relationship and I take my studies seriously as well.

Alot of my friends are a few years older than me, just bc they're more settled down, but even still, I feel like I can't relate 100% to them. I'm living in a substance free section of my dorm next semester though, so I'm hoping I can find more people like me

.

Jenglory · Jun 30th, 2008, 12:48 PM

I understand! I myself am a loner, and an unapologetic one at that!

I grew up in a large family with NO privacy (shared a room with two sisters), so now that I am an adult I really enjoy the peace and quiet. That doesn't mean I don't enjoy social activities occasionally, it just means that I prefer enjoying my own company a lot of the time.

Drives my fiance crazy, but he does appreciate that I encourage him to go out without me.

aliciamarie · Jun 30th, 2008, 01:39 PM

I'm the same way. I have always gotten along better with guys. I've never been interested in all the drama that having female friends brings. I've always been a loner. People try to blame it on "spending all my time with my boyfriends" but they just don't understand that I don't really enjoy partying/going out.

I have one female friend and she's exactly like me. More of a tomboy and doesn't get along with other girls. Neither of us are catty or gossip-y. I have to admit though, I recently had to kick my gay best friend to the curb because he was the biggest source of drama in my life. It made me sad.

I agree with other posters that said the media playing up the whole SATC friendships makes us feel abnormal, but I know lots of ladies like us.

My SO feels just as frustrated because he doesn't have the whole wild, rowdy, frat boy type friendships and people think he's weird and a loner.

Mahina · Jun 30th, 2008, 04:12 PM

I don't have any female friends either. Zip, zero, nada.

I have the scars and don't care for any more.

Danica · Jun 30th, 2008, 04:20 PM

Cristina, it's too bad that I cannot meet girls like you! I'd much rather be doing all the things you mentioned than drinking/gossiping or whatever. All the girls here I meet seem to be shallow little beotches and one in particular actually calls herself a princess! *UGH Anyways it's hard to meet people now that I'm out of school plus away from my friends back home. I'm hoping that I can meet some people through my daughter once she's born. ha ha ha I'm sad. :/

Cristina · Jun 30th, 2008, 04:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Danica

Cristina, it's too bad that I cannot meet girls like you! I'd much rather be doing all the things you mentioned than drinking/gossiping or whatever. All the girls here I meet seem to be shallow little beotches and one in particular actually calls herself a princess! *UGH Anyways it's hard to meet people now that I'm out of school plus away from my friends back home. I'm hoping that I can meet some people through my daughter once she's born. ha ha ha I'm sad. :/

LOL, are you sure you don't live in South Florida? Man, I cannot wait to get out of here

Next time I'm in near TN, we'll have to meet! I was in Asheville not long ago. Mellecyn can come visit, too

I'm kinda indie/creative, too, although my creativity is squashed by work and school projects, it seems.

mellecyn · Jul 1st, 2008, 06:13 AM

^oh yeah I´d love to, I always thought you were the kind of friend I´d have IRL.... !! But I *only* need to fly to the US

.....or u can come visit to EU

grayxie · Jul 1st, 2008, 07:15 AM

I have felt the same way for years, this is a concept that I could never understand. Especially in college with the concept of "sorority sisters", which totally baffled me. I'm not really into going out, so my social activities pretty much are dog involved. I too am not into all the gossip, meeting guys at a bar, shopping together, etc. Sure I like fashion to a point, and of course my bags

I have one girlfriend which I have known since the fifth grade, and the rest of my friends are guys.

lostnexposed · Jul 1st, 2008, 01:39 PM

I know exactly how u feel! plus this whole going out every night, having drinks kinda thing is starting to bore me and Im only 24. I dunno, I feel like Ive just moved on from it all and my friends still havent.

Im the kind who would rather have 1 good friend than to have a big group of friends who only call u when they need u kinda thing.

Danica · Jul 1st, 2008, 01:42 PM

Cristina, we should!! That would be alot of fun, and if I have to leave Memphis to meet people, lol I'm willing to do that!

Jahpson · Jul 1st, 2008, 01:43 PM

There should be a "TPF on tour" where a group of girls go arond different states of the country and visit local TPF girls. lol

im such a dreamer.

luckygirl83 · Jul 2nd, 2008, 01:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lostnexposed

I know exactly how u feel! plus this whole going out every night, having drinks kinda thing is starting to bore me and Im only 24. I dunno, I feel like Ive just moved on from it all and my friends still havent.

Im the kind who would rather have 1 good friend than to have a big group of friends who only call u when they need u kinda thing.

Yea! I found someone else like me. I am 24 and I haven't figured out the drinks thing quite yet. I know people go out for after work drinks. I haven't caught on to that either. I'd rather go for a hot chocolate.

Jun 30th, 2008, 12:21 AM	#46
caitlin1214 Santa Baby Location: Toronto, Canada (Eh?)	I love browsing bookstores by myself for as long as I want. I love choosing the movie I want to see and then watching it in peace without worrying about people talking to me. In college, I loved not freaking out if I didn't see anyone I knew/wanted to sit with in the cafeteria. __________________ And this above all: to thine ownself be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man. Polonius, Hamlet Act I, sc iii

Jun 30th, 2008, 04:03 AM	#47
carvedwords ♥ Location: beautiful Southern California!	I'm exactly the same way. I always feel I'm being judged by the girls I meet and I hate that. I've had a few good close friends and have been burned by all of them. It's kind of made it hard for me to trust anyone lately, but sometimes I do wish I had a small group that I could click with. __________________ WISHLIST: ... LV Galliera GM ... LV Nimbus Anthracite GM LOOKING FOR A LV TISSE BELT!! PLEASE PM IF YOU SEE ONE!

Jun 30th, 2008, 07:37 AM	#48
mellecyn Take me to LV Location: 300 km from LV somewhere in Europe	This might be due to where you live ? You seem really cool to be around and have normal healthy interests !! I love music too and going to concerts, movies, I´m not much of an outdoor sports person but my girlfriends are....biking, walking, etc.... You´re meeting the wrong women unfortunately, with my GFs we meet up for brunch, coffee but we never bitch around, we just have a good laugh talking about anything, and joking around. We´ve even travel or have week-ends together !! I´ve never been close to too girly girls, but more to the creative indie type (still feminine), I don´t like fussy people.... there should be more than 1 type of women where you live ?? __________________ "You never change things by fighting the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete" Buckminster Fuller

Jun 30th, 2008, 08:07 AM	#49
tmc089 Kiera Knightley? Location: Southeastern CT	Lol, your completley normal. I'm in a similar situation. I'm 19, gonna be a sophmore in college, and every single person I know from school drinks heavily and parties literally every night. Me on the other hand...no. I rarely drink...honestly probably like 3 times a year. And when I do drink, I have one single drink. All the girls at school are so concerned about which guy they're gonna hook up with next, if they're hair and makeup is perfect, and who's getting booze for the night. Yeah, I like doing hair/makeup/girly stuff...but I'm in a serious relationship and I take my studies seriously as well. Alot of my friends are a few years older than me, just bc they're more settled down, but even still, I feel like I can't relate 100% to them. I'm living in a substance free section of my dorm next semester though, so I'm hoping I can find more people like me . __________________ Tricia "Love all, trust few, do wrong to no one."

Jun 30th, 2008, 01:39 PM	#51
aliciamarie Member Location: NE Ohio	I'm the same way. I have always gotten along better with guys. I've never been interested in all the drama that having female friends brings. I've always been a loner. People try to blame it on "spending all my time with my boyfriends" but they just don't understand that I don't really enjoy partying/going out. I have one female friend and she's exactly like me. More of a tomboy and doesn't get along with other girls. Neither of us are catty or gossip-y. I have to admit though, I recently had to kick my gay best friend to the curb because he was the biggest source of drama in my life. It made me sad. I agree with other posters that said the media playing up the whole SATC friendships makes us feel abnormal, but I know lots of ladies like us. My SO feels just as frustrated because he doesn't have the whole wild, rowdy, frat boy type friendships and people think he's weird and a loner. __________________ Alicia Current wishlist: - Tons of Madison accessories! - Soho patent satchel in that to die for burgundy color. - Something op art

Jun 30th, 2008, 12:48 PM	#50
Jenglory Member	I understand! I myself am a loner, and an unapologetic one at that! I grew up in a large family with NO privacy (shared a room with two sisters), so now that I am an adult I really enjoy the peace and quiet. That doesn't mean I don't enjoy social activities occasionally, it just means that I prefer enjoying my own company a lot of the time. Drives my fiance crazy, but he does appreciate that I encourage him to go out without me.

Jun 30th, 2008, 04:12 PM	#52
Mahina Multi-slacking Location: A cold rainforest	I don't have any female friends either. Zip, zero, nada. I have the scars and don't care for any more. Last edited by Mahina; Jun 30th, 2008 at 04:26 PM.

Jun 30th, 2008, 04:20 PM	#53
Danica Mijn boter boontje Location: TN	Cristina, it's too bad that I cannot meet girls like you! I'd much rather be doing all the things you mentioned than drinking/gossiping or whatever. All the girls here I meet seem to be shallow little beotches and one in particular actually calls herself a princess! UGH Anyways it's hard to meet people now that I'm out of school plus away from my friends back home. I'm hoping that I can meet some people through my daughter once she's born. ha ha ha I'm sad. :/ __________________ Cheerleader for love*

Jul 1st, 2008, 06:13 AM	#55
mellecyn Take me to LV Location: 300 km from LV somewhere in Europe	^oh yeah I´d love to, I always thought you were the kind of friend I´d have IRL.... !! But I only need to fly to the US .....or u can come visit to EU __________________ "You never change things by fighting the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete" Buckminster Fuller

Jul 1st, 2008, 07:15 AM	#56
grayxie Member Location: PA	I have felt the same way for years, this is a concept that I could never understand. Especially in college with the concept of "sorority sisters", which totally baffled me. I'm not really into going out, so my social activities pretty much are dog involved. I too am not into all the gossip, meeting guys at a bar, shopping together, etc. Sure I like fashion to a point, and of course my bags I have one girlfriend which I have known since the fifth grade, and the rest of my friends are guys. __________________ Wishlist COACH Peony Black Sunnies COACH Denim Tie Dye wallet - GOT IT! (Thanks to my RAOK Buddy!) Dooney Black Cabriolet Satchel L.A.M.B. Cheetah Mandeville- GOT IT! L.A.M.B. Lipstick or Black Saddle Devon L.A.M.B. Tailynn Sandal L.A.M.B. Smoke Fadeout

Jul 1st, 2008, 01:39 PM	#57
lostnexposed Uh Oh It's E Location: RAOK Land	I know exactly how u feel! plus this whole going out every night, having drinks kinda thing is starting to bore me and Im only 24. I dunno, I feel like Ive just moved on from it all and my friends still havent. Im the kind who would rather have 1 good friend than to have a big group of friends who only call u when they need u kinda thing.

Jul 1st, 2008, 01:42 PM	#58
Danica Mijn boter boontje Location: TN	Cristina, we should!! That would be alot of fun, and if I have to leave Memphis to meet people, lol I'm willing to do that! __________________ Cheerleader for love

Jul 1st, 2008, 01:43 PM	#59
Jahpson Member Location: The Playground	There should be a "TPF on tour" where a group of girls go arond different states of the country and visit local TPF girls. lol im such a dreamer. __________________ Amazingly Sophisticated Happy Holidays to all my TPF friends!