I hate my Bf's Mom's bets friend!!!! HELP PLS!

nooch · Jun 24th, 2008, 06:47 PM

My father in law's friend kept telling my fiance about how beautiful his daughter was AND SHE'S FIFTEEN. I almost decked him.

chinadoll724 · Jun 24th, 2008, 06:57 PM

Oooooo, I was in a similar situation. My bf's mom loves me, but her best friend really wanted him to date her daughter. They grew up together (my bf and her daughter) and she's 2 years younger and we all suspect (the mothers were talking about it) that she had a big crush on him. Well, she would always make backhanded remarks like "Oh, you'd look so much prettier if you got contacts", "You look like you need chapstick" and "Wow, your legs look longer than normal. You should wear heels more often".

It was incredibly annoying and I wanted to throw comments back at her, but my bf and I just laughed through it as it was obvious she was just jealous. We've been dating for 5 years and last Sept, when her family came to Cali, we had dinner with them and . . . she was pleasant! I think once she finally got over that her daughter was not going to date him, she dropped the bitchiness and we actually had a nice night with good conversation. And when she went back to Ohio (where his mom still lives) she raved about how pretty I looked and how I have a great personality- I almost died from shock . . .

So just hang in there and laugh about it if you can. It helps if your bf is more understanding, but hopefully, this is just a phase for her.

BagLadie · Jun 24th, 2008, 08:29 PM

When I was your age I wouldn't have said or done anything about this. But now at my age....I would simply tell this woman to "f" off. Who has time for that BS?

Lululovebags · Jun 25th, 2008, 12:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by illinirdhd

Just smile and say "that's nice" when you really want to haul off and clobber her. If she's your BF's mom's best friend, it's going to be better to ignore her gracefully than to give her an earful. You don't want to piss off your BF or his mom.

that's what i thought too.. pissing my bf and his mom will be the last thing that i wanna do right now.

Lululovebags · Jun 25th, 2008, 12:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by barcreperie

Want to put her off? When she makes a snide remark to you as she did with the flowers, stop, turn to face her, and with an inquisitive look on your face, say something like "Now why would you say something like that?" Keep looking her in the eye, don't let up. Let her know it's not a rhetorical question, that you're waiting for an answer. Keep doing this, but inserting a variation of the question, each time she makes a snide remark. Highlight what she's done for all who are nearby to listen. But do it in an innocent way. Keep putting her on the spot each time she does it. Embarrass her.

i never did thought about this barcreperie!! i guess her comments really left me walking away and bleeding all the time as i took it too personally..

but that's a great way of getting her back and make me look like the good guy at th same time..!

Lululovebags · Jun 25th, 2008, 12:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nooch

My father in law's friend kept telling my fiance about how beautiful his daughter was AND SHE'S FIFTEEN. I almost decked him.

gawd, don't you just hate it.. mine have yet to go to the complimenting stage yet.. errrr, maybe there is nothing to give compliments about about her loser daughter of hers?

Lululovebags · Jun 25th, 2008, 12:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chinadoll724

Oooooo, I was in a similar situation. My bf's mom loves me, but her best friend really wanted him to date her daughter. They grew up together (my bf and her daughter) and she's 2 years younger and we all suspect (the mothers were talking about it) that she had a big crush on him. Well, she would always make backhanded remarks like "Oh, you'd look so much prettier if you got contacts", "You look like you need chapstick" and "Wow, your legs look longer than normal. You should wear heels more often".

It was incredibly annoying and I wanted to throw comments back at her, but my bf and I just laughed through it as it was obvious she was just jealous. We've been dating for 5 years and last Sept, when her family came to Cali, we had dinner with them and . . . she was pleasant! I think once she finally got over that her daughter was not going to date him, she dropped the bitchiness and we actually had a nice night with good conversation. And when she went back to Ohio (where his mom still lives) she raved about how pretty I looked and how I have a great personality- I almost died from shock . . .

So just hang in there and laugh about it if you can. It helps if your bf is more understanding, but hopefully, this is just a phase for her.

i'm trying to..but i'm feeling a tad insecure with my bf when these 2 morons are in the picture. i hope N gets the shit soon and leave us alone for good!

cutiepie21 · Jun 26th, 2008, 02:17 AM

How about trying to set "Ns" daughter up with another boy? Maybe then her daughter won't keep going over to your bf's house.

Glamfoxx · Jun 27th, 2008, 06:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by barcreperie

Want to put her off? When she makes a snide remark to you as she did with the flowers, stop, turn to face her, and with an inquisitive look on your face, say something like "Now why would you say something like that?" Keep looking her in the eye, don't let up. Let her know it's not a rhetorical question, that you're waiting for an answer. Keep doing this, but inserting a variation of the question, each time she makes a snide remark. Highlight what she's done for all who are nearby to listen. But do it in an innocent way. Keep putting her on the spot each time she does it. Embarrass her.

I have found this to be the single best way to handle people who try to cut you down. Once she knows you aren't an easy target, she will most likely back off. If she doesn't, she will just continue to make herself look like a classless, nasty fool. Good luck!

QueenOfDa702 · Jun 27th, 2008, 06:37 AM

She sounds like shes jealous of you in a weird "I want my Daughter to date your boyfriend, Im mad because you got to him before she turned 18" sort of way. Ignore her ignorance.

If you must say something, say something REALLY nice, that would piss her off.

For example, in the flower situation... She said "Those flowers are ugly" I would have said right after, "Did I mention how great you look tonight?" I think its hilarious to watch people ponder what you just said with that look on their face like

"Is she serious, or being sarcastic?"

If she takes it sarcastically and tells your MIL about it, you can always say "Huh? All I did was say how nice she looked!"

SPOILEDkiwi · Jun 27th, 2008, 08:32 PM

I usually find that reprimanding people like children is the bitchiest thing I could do without actually stirring up trouble. Just put on your best first grade teacher voice and say "Well, that's not a very nice thing to say, is it?" in a really condescending tone whenever she makes a rude remark. Or I like the idea of asking her why she would say something like that. Your goal is to not start a fight, just embarrass her and make her feel stupid.

Lululovebags · Jun 28th, 2008, 01:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cutiepie21

How about trying to set "Ns" daughter up with another boy? Maybe then her daughter won't keep going over to your bf's house.

Gosh, I don't wanna ruin my friends or anyone i know!

Lululovebags · Jun 28th, 2008, 01:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Glamfoxx

I have found this to be the single best way to handle people who try to cut you down. Once she knows you aren't an easy target, she will most likely back off. If she doesn't, she will just continue to make herself look like a classless, nasty fool. Good luck!

yeah, will definitely keep this in mind!~ thanks glamfoxx!

Lululovebags · Jun 28th, 2008, 01:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by QueenOfDa702

She sounds like shes jealous of you in a weird "I want my Daughter to date your boyfriend, Im mad because you got to him before she turned 18" sort of way. Ignore her ignorance.

If you must say something, say something REALLY nice, that would piss her off.

For example, in the flower situation... She said "Those flowers are ugly" I would have said right after, "Did I mention how great you look tonight?" I think its hilarious to watch people ponder what you just said with that look on their face like

"Is she serious, or being sarcastic?"

If she takes it sarcastically and tells your MIL about it, you can always say "Huh? All I did was say how nice she looked!"

that's a win-win situation! yippeeeeeee! and yes, i think she is jealous that's why she is sucha hater~!

exotikittenx · Jun 28th, 2008, 10:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by barcreperie

Want to put her off? When she makes a snide remark to you as she did with the flowers, stop, turn to face her, and with an inquisitive look on your face, say something like "Now why would you say something like that?" Keep looking her in the eye, don't let up. Let her know it's not a rhetorical question, that you're waiting for an answer. Keep doing this, but inserting a variation of the question, each time she makes a snide remark. Highlight what she's done for all who are nearby to listen. But do it in an innocent way. Keep putting her on the spot each time she does it. Embarrass her.

Excellent advice! Perhaps that would stop her in her tracks. Whatever you do, don't make a snide comment back, or even give a little bit of attitude. She will be the one looking like a monster, and you will appear the classier one. And in the meantime try not to associate with her and just enjoy yourself.

Jun 24th, 2008, 06:47 PM	#16
nooch bubblehead Location: new mexico via BROOKLYN NY	My father in law's friend kept telling my fiance about how beautiful his daughter was AND SHE'S FIFTEEN. I almost decked him. __________________ FAT AND FABULOUS! CHANGE THE WAY YOU THINK NOT THE WAY YOU LOOK! http://www.natreasures.com Authentic American Indian jewelry & crafts All orders ship free PM me for discount codes

Jun 24th, 2008, 08:29 PM	#18
BagLadie Got a handle on it Location: Red Sox Nation	When I was your age I wouldn't have said or done anything about this. But now at my age....I would simply tell this woman to "f" off. Who has time for that BS? __________________ One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain. - Bob Marley

Jun 26th, 2008, 02:17 AM	#23
cutiepie21 LV~Love	How about trying to set "Ns" daughter up with another boy? Maybe then her daughter won't keep going over to your bf's house. __________________

Jun 27th, 2008, 06:37 AM	#25
QueenOfDa702 Misunderestimated. Location: I've gone RAOKing crazy!	She sounds like shes jealous of you in a weird "I want my Daughter to date your boyfriend, Im mad because you got to him before she turned 18" sort of way. Ignore her ignorance. If you must say something, say something REALLY nice, that would piss her off. For example, in the flower situation... She said "Those flowers are ugly" I would have said right after, "Did I mention how great you look tonight?" I think its hilarious to watch people ponder what you just said with that look on their face like "Is she serious, or being sarcastic?" If she takes it sarcastically and tells your MIL about it, you can always say "Huh? All I did was say how nice she looked!" __________________ ~Valeen~ Happy Holidays to all my tPF friends! Click HERE to visit MySpace Please help get justice for Karley! http://forum.purseblog.com/animalici...ey-385571.html Last edited by QueenOfDa702; Jun 27th, 2008 at 06:41 AM.

Jun 27th, 2008, 08:32 PM	#26
SPOILEDkiwi not a kiwi! Location: NYC/Long Island	I usually find that reprimanding people like children is the bitchiest thing I could do without actually stirring up trouble. Just put on your best first grade teacher voice and say "Well, that's not a very nice thing to say, is it?" in a really condescending tone whenever she makes a rude remark. Or I like the idea of asking her why she would say something like that. Your goal is to not start a fight, just embarrass her and make her feel stupid. __________________ “It is the unseen, unforgettable, ultimate accessory of fashion that heralds your arrival and prolongs your departure.” --Coco Chanel

Jun 24th, 2008, 06:57 PM	#17
chinadoll724 Member	Oooooo, I was in a similar situation. My bf's mom loves me, but her best friend really wanted him to date her daughter. They grew up together (my bf and her daughter) and she's 2 years younger and we all suspect (the mothers were talking about it) that she had a big crush on him. Well, she would always make backhanded remarks like "Oh, you'd look so much prettier if you got contacts", "You look like you need chapstick" and "Wow, your legs look longer than normal. You should wear heels more often". It was incredibly annoying and I wanted to throw comments back at her, but my bf and I just laughed through it as it was obvious she was just jealous. We've been dating for 5 years and last Sept, when her family came to Cali, we had dinner with them and . . . she was pleasant! I think once she finally got over that her daughter was not going to date him, she dropped the bitchiness and we actually had a nice night with good conversation. And when she went back to Ohio (where his mom still lives) she raved about how pretty I looked and how I have a great personality- I almost died from shock . . . So just hang in there and laugh about it if you can. It helps if your bf is more understanding, but hopefully, this is just a phase for her.