How many crushes have people usually had :P

[ηαя¢ιςςα]

Thanks so much!

[Jahpson]

Originally Posted by plain jane doe

Oops, sorry, I skipped a post and thought that OP had said her BF was definitely not asexual. I agree with you, and actually I was reading the other day about a study that gay kids are more likely to get pregnant/get a girl pregnant than straight kids perhaps as more solid "proof" of being straight.

wow, interesting fact

[meganfm]

@plain jane doe I read that too! It was in a sex advice column in a local newspaper.

[Charles]

Originally Posted by ηαя¢ιςςα

Gay people creep him out. No offense.

It's called Reaction Formation. It's when someone "supposedly" shows hate or dislike towards something else in order to cover up their own feelings about that exact topic. It's a classic defense mechanism, and often found in men who are in the closet. They'll put of a front that they hate the gay lifestyle, when in fact, they are gay, but ashamed of it.

Not saying your bf is gay, but just cause someone "creeps him out" doesn't mean it's true.

[Cornflower Blue]

I had a crush on a guy when I was about 12. Always liked him, and even when I was older found him attractive, until I realized he had a brain the size of a pea.

[ηαя¢ιςςα]

Originally Posted by Charles

It's called Reaction Formation. It's when someone "supposedly" shows hate or dislike towards something else in order to cover up their own feelings about that exact topic. It's a classic defense mechanism, and often found in men who are in the closet. They'll put of a front that they hate the gay lifestyle, when in fact, they are gay, but ashamed of it. Not saying your bf is gay, but just cause someone "creeps him out" doesn't mean it's true.

Okay. But gay people don't creep him out, I worded that wrong.

[bagnshoofetish]

Originally Posted by ηαя¢ιςςα

Gay people creep him out. No offense.

thats really sad. there is a line from a Shakespeare play that reads, "me thinks she doth protest too much". if people are going through a confusing time about their sexuality, they can be repulsed by the very thing they just may be. a man who is confident with his sexuality would not be "creeped out" by a gay man. I'm just speaking from my experience with all the heterosexual men in my life. The overly "macho" guys I have known were overcompensating for their fear of being gay themselves.

just sayin'.

[bagnshoofetish]

Originally Posted by ηαя¢ιςςα

Is it impossible for a guy to not be attracted to any girls/have flings/random crushes until he meets someone he loves? What part of that story doesn't add up?

it seems impossible but only according to my personal experience with young red blooded american boys. I have an older brother who was horribly shy around girls in his teens (in other words did not have a steady girlfriend during that time) but he still had a boatload of crushes thats for sure....

[bagnshoofetish]

Originally Posted by ηαя¢ιςςα

...I remember asking him to prove he's not gay we're open about this, and I ask this to guys all the time for fun, ...

I don't think I've ever asked a straight guy to prove to me he wasn't gay? Thats just a little strange to me. I gotta ask, why you would think thats a fun thing to do? might help me understand where you are coming from better...
reading some of your posts just makes me wonder why him or any other guy being gay intrigues you so much? and I'm not saying your bf is gay - but some of the posts would make me wonder if he was at least bi-sexual?

[bagnshoofetish]

Originally Posted by ηαя¢ιςςα

It was a joke. He asked me if I'm a lesbian first. .

okay I give up! I've been out of the dating scene for over 18 years now so maybe dating conversations have changed a lot!

[ηαя¢ιςςα]

Originally Posted by bagnshoofetish

okay I give up! I've been out of the dating scene for over 18 years now so maybe dating conversations have changed a lot!

Maybe! Or maybe not! I seem to do it a lot, though. Like, in a teasing way, to my obviously straight friends. I remember in high school we had fun matching our (straight) guy friends with each other. They all took it as fun. Maybe it's not normal. But between us, I don't think there's anything inappropriate to say besides comments about cheating and such. That's the only time he would be offended at what I say. But only if I actually mean it. And I never do.

I'm sorry that I said "gay people creep him out" which is offensive to many. That's not what i meant. I meant that when his friends are openly gay to him, whether they actually are or they're joking, it creeps him out.

[ηαя¢ιςςα]

Originally Posted by bagnshoofetish

it seems impossible but only according to my personal experience with young red blooded american boys. I have an older brother who was horribly shy around girls in his teens (in other words did not have a steady girlfriend during that time) but he still had a boatload of crushes thats for sure....

I see. That's how most of the people I know are like, too. Definitely not all of them, though, I know some people who are almost seemingly asexual. But BF says that he doesn't actually think they're asexual, just that they have yet to find someone they actually like.

And no, he's not horribly shy around girls. In fact, he has a TON of friends who are girls (a lot of mutual friends, too) who love to talk to him because he's good at listening and giving good advice. But he says he's never felt any type of attraction.

[lightdays]

I've lost count how many guys I liked and lost count how many guys liked me.

[aklein]

Originally Posted by ηαя¢ιςςα

Maybe! Or maybe not! I seem to do it a lot, though. Like, in a teasing way, to my obviously straight friends. I remember in high school we had fun matching our (straight) guy friends with each other. They all took it as fun. Maybe it's not normal. But between us, I don't think there's anything inappropriate to say besides comments about cheating and such. That's the only time he would be offended at what I say. But only if I actually mean it. And I never do. I'm sorry that I said "gay people creep him out" which is offensive to many. That's not what i meant. I meant that when his friends are openly gay to him, whether they actually are or they're joking, it creeps him out.

Yeah, that bolded part is still offensive. I know that you said that he is very liberal and is fine with gay people, but the above post indicates otherwise. And at the end of the day, you are still saying that he is repulsed by gay people.
And I do find it strange that you asked that he prove he's not gay, even though you were joking. How exactly does someone prove what their sexuality is? It's not like we all come with a stamp somewhere that indicates our sexual preference.

[ηαя¢ιςςα]

Originally Posted by aklein

Yeah, that bolded part is still offensive. I know that you said that he is very liberal and is fine with gay people, but the above post indicates otherwise. And at the end of the day, you are still saying that he is repulsed by gay people. And I do find it strange that you asked that he prove he's not gay, even though you were joking. How exactly does someone prove what their sexuality is? It's not like we all come with a stamp somewhere that indicates our sexual preference.

I'd be creeped out if a girl tried to make out with me or molest me. No, he isn't repulsed by gay people - sorry for the confusion (I tried to correct it a few times). And it was a joke, btw, meaning that I didn't expect a real answer.