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dearmissie · Nov 21st, 2007, 08:20 AM

every year holiday season is soooo stressful i feel like crap each year. mostly bc my fiance's family is so difficult. they are very unreasonable and big headed. they just seem to think the world evolves around them and do not care how they come across to others esp. my family.

every year we spend thanksgiving and christmas with his family. and we just spend the week before xmas with mine in my home town of san diego. (we live in the bay) and this year we are flying back to spend xmas with his family on the evening of xmas eve (5:05pm flight lands to be exact) and my dear fiance's father threw a fit. (even though we ran this past them before, and they said just be home for xmas!) he said he wanted my fiance home on the 23. and we told him that there wasnt anything with his side of the family the morning of xmas eve so why cant we just come home then? i like to actually spend some time with my family this year! (bc of school, this year we will only be down with my family for about 3 days!!) his father then replied to my fiance (i was on the phone) "well you two arent even married!" i was crushed!! ive felt so numb and hurt since. his family and i used to get along, until i found out how fake they were to me. because i was not filipino or white (but i am asian!) they do not like me. (however they adore the brother's gf because shes white. when she is a druggy and brags on how shes a hs drop out and how she aborted her child) last year we didnt talk for a year because of the way they were treating me. i did everything for their family. cooking and cleaning, running their family business, doing all their legal paper work. and they give me crap. then they finally asked me to join for lunch after almost a year of never talking or seeing each other. (mostly because my fiance would just come to my place every day for that year. they felt they lost their son) and once we started talking, they were alright. and now with the holidays their true colors are showing. im so stressed. im usually so jolly esp around the holiday season. i cannot wait to just leave this place and go to see my family. this year i refuse to spend thanksgiving with his family so i will be doing nothing. ive told him to spend it with his family, i wouldnt want to stop him. and this christmas i told him i wanted to just stay down with my family. he'll fly home alone. it'll be our first holidays not together in 3 years. :[ im def. bummed!

bobobags · Nov 21st, 2007, 07:55 PM

Holidays just make me sad because my children have to make the choice of where they want to spend the holiday, with me or with their dad. .......They left to their dad's today.................

.
I try not to make a big deal out of it so they won't feel guilty but it still makes me sad!

ladyjane76 · Nov 22nd, 2007, 02:15 AM

holidays definately depress me, I dont know why, always have. the last 4 yrs SO and I were stationed in south florida, so we missed thanksgiving with my family we'd spend christmas on a good awful cruise with his family and we agreed this year we'd spend thanksgiving with my parents well... my dad died in august and noone feels like doing anything, so He's going fishing with friends back home and Im flying to my BFF on thanksgiving for her daughters (and my new god daughters) baptism on sunday. I dont know what I'd do without her.

surlygirl · Nov 23rd, 2007, 01:25 AM

My birthday is right before Thanksgiving, and every year that starts my end-of-year depression. It usually lasts from my birthday until well after the new year. For me, it's a combination of getting older, going home to visit family and then just feeling like there are so many things that I want to change in my life. Most of my friends know that I start hibernating this time of year. I try not to let this time of year affect me, but it does.

sheishollywood · Nov 23rd, 2007, 01:36 AM

Originally Posted by BacardiGirl

Does anyone start to get somewhat depressed when the holidays roll around? I am experiencing that at the monent...I have a busy week of family gatherings, parties and dinners, but I am just not feeling up to any of it anymore. I feel tired, stressed and just down in the dumps. Is this normal?

Totally. I was with my ex boyfriend for years and I almost forgot what it was like to not have someone there for the holiday season. This would definitely be the first. But it also reminded me about all the times I missed with my dearest friends.

I think I'm beginning to embrace the solitude and the complete control over my own life and although sometimes I'm bummed about it all, I am actually look forward to spending this Christmas somewhat alone. I don't know what it'd be like on Christmas morning but all I can say that it's just another addition to my independence.

It's normal to feel down, but don't be too hard on yourself and just try to let it go and just think of it as any other day. :)

bagnshoofetish · Nov 23rd, 2007, 10:42 PM

I personally can not wait for January every year. As a Christian, I so dislike what the holidays have turned into. Its all about shopping and getting gifts. Its not my birthday afterall. It saddens me but I keep my chin up by not buying into it. Finding more charitible things to do this time of year helps alot!

Nov 21st, 2007, 08:20 AM	#16
dearmissie formerly oo0ehxtahcee0oo Joined: Aug 2007 Location: After a much needed break, I'M BACK!! Posts: 7,269	Re: holiday blahs every year holiday season is soooo stressful i feel like crap each year. mostly bc my fiance's family is so difficult. they are very unreasonable and big headed. they just seem to think the world evolves around them and do not care how they come across to others esp. my family. every year we spend thanksgiving and christmas with his family. and we just spend the week before xmas with mine in my home town of san diego. (we live in the bay) and this year we are flying back to spend xmas with his family on the evening of xmas eve (5:05pm flight lands to be exact) and my dear fiance's father threw a fit. (even though we ran this past them before, and they said just be home for xmas!) he said he wanted my fiance home on the 23. and we told him that there wasnt anything with his side of the family the morning of xmas eve so why cant we just come home then? i like to actually spend some time with my family this year! (bc of school, this year we will only be down with my family for about 3 days!!) his father then replied to my fiance (i was on the phone) "well you two arent even married!" i was crushed!! ive felt so numb and hurt since. his family and i used to get along, until i found out how fake they were to me. because i was not filipino or white (but i am asian!) they do not like me. (however they adore the brother's gf because shes white. when she is a druggy and brags on how shes a hs drop out and how she aborted her child) last year we didnt talk for a year because of the way they were treating me. i did everything for their family. cooking and cleaning, running their family business, doing all their legal paper work. and they give me crap. then they finally asked me to join for lunch after almost a year of never talking or seeing each other. (mostly because my fiance would just come to my place every day for that year. they felt they lost their son) and once we started talking, they were alright. and now with the holidays their true colors are showing. im so stressed. im usually so jolly esp around the holiday season. i cannot wait to just leave this place and go to see my family. this year i refuse to spend thanksgiving with his family so i will be doing nothing. ive told him to spend it with his family, i wouldnt want to stop him. and this christmas i told him i wanted to just stay down with my family. he'll fly home alone. it'll be our first holidays not together in 3 years. :[ im def. bummed!

Nov 21st, 2007, 07:55 PM	#17
bobobags I love your bag!!! Joined: Mar 2006 Location: Markham Texas Posts: 1,343	Re: holiday blahs Holidays just make me sad because my children have to make the choice of where they want to spend the holiday, with me or with their dad. .......They left to their dad's today................. . I try not to make a big deal out of it so they won't feel guilty but it still makes me sad!

Nov 22nd, 2007, 02:15 AM	#18
ladyjane76 ladyjane Joined: Jul 2007 Location: Agrestic Posts: 1,524	Re: holiday blahs holidays definately depress me, I dont know why, always have. the last 4 yrs SO and I were stationed in south florida, so we missed thanksgiving with my family we'd spend christmas on a good awful cruise with his family and we agreed this year we'd spend thanksgiving with my parents well... my dad died in august and noone feels like doing anything, so He's going fishing with friends back home and Im flying to my BFF on thanksgiving for her daughters (and my new god daughters) baptism on sunday. I dont know what I'd do without her.
	__________________ LadyJane

Nov 23rd, 2007, 01:25 AM	#19
surlygirl where my ring at??!! Joined: Jun 2006 Location: Washington, DC area Posts: 5,411	Re: holiday blahs My birthday is right before Thanksgiving, and every year that starts my end-of-year depression. It usually lasts from my birthday until well after the new year. For me, it's a combination of getting older, going home to visit family and then just feeling like there are so many things that I want to change in my life. Most of my friends know that I start hibernating this time of year. I try not to let this time of year affect me, but it does.

Nov 23rd, 2007, 10:42 PM	#21
bagnshoofetish keep smiling.... Joined: Feb 2006 Posts: 20,358	Re: holiday blahs I personally can not wait for January every year. As a Christian, I so dislike what the holidays have turned into. Its all about shopping and getting gifts. Its not my birthday afterall. It saddens me but I keep my chin up by not buying into it. Finding more charitible things to do this time of year helps alot!
	__________________

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